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WS

Author failed to do his homework

Reviewed in the United States on January 15, 2018

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There are some valid points in this book, but the author is woefully ignorant in the field of comparative psychology, and repeatedly makes claims that simply aren't borne out by research. He claims, for example that humans are the only species in which adults engage in play, although he allows for the possibility in cetaceans. This is entirely inaccurate. He also claims that humans are the only species that exhibits compassion for unrelated individuals (although, again he holds out the possibility of cetaceans, for which he apparently has a fondness), a concept that is also belied by any number of studies of altruistic behavior in other species. I appreciate that Comparative Psychology is not his area of expertise, but for the sake of credibility, it would have been prudent to do at least a cursory review of current research before making such broad claims in a field he's unfamiliar with. The fact that he wasn't willing to take this most basic step to ensure the accuracy of his claims makes the reliability of his other premises suspect.

In addition, he makes claims based on his own opinions, rather than on empirical data, claiming, for example, that all humans find learning and accomplishments useless unless shared with others. His characterization of his friend hitting a hole-in-one on a golf course "disastrous" because he was alone on the course speaks more to the author's insecurities than to anything else. The author is, of course, entitled to his own opinions. The issue is that he presents them indiscriminately as facts.

Julia

Bridges of Madison County?

Reviewed in the United States on April 10, 2019

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NO!!! I can't get through this book, I don't know where the author gets all his "facts" about therapy, but he seems quite superficial. I had to give up when he decided he wanted to use the Bridges of Madison County as an example of how to do therapy. The Audible form of the book is particularly awful, as the narrator tries to do an Italian accent. He definitely has some weird ideas. He thinks we choose to depress, and ignores the chemical reactions of our bodies. He thinks that that people who value freedom should not get married... ok.

TrippSter

Away with Ye Scurvy Self-Help. Captain Glasser is Here.

Reviewed in the United States on January 20, 2015

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When you examine just how many self-help books really exist, calling this the best one may be a bit bold. However, I don't know that I would call this a self-help book. It does help you, make no mistake. However, it transcends the Newtonian mechanics of most self-help books and avoids the personality assessment pop-psychology of many others. This is a book about the importance of relationships and cuts through all the daddy issues crap to get to the heart of what is truly as stake and what is the issue. Understanding that others have sought to control us as we have sought to control others in throughout our life and that the big risk of allowing others to choose and striving to draw near to them regardless of their choice is not risky at all.

I have had my copy for over three years and have read it at least twice each year. It is my scientific companion to other writings that have helped make my life and relationships better.

Amazon Customer

The best book i have ever read!

Reviewed in the United States on July 20, 2019

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I never read "self improvement" kinda books cause most of them are bs and trying to play with your emotions and make you feel like you are doing something. this book however, is written by a psychologist who had both education and practice. he explains why he says what he say, rather than just making unsubstantiated claims. he also proposes meaningful and practical solutions. my sister recommended this to me. after a year of conflict with her daughter, she said she read this book and put it to use, and they are closer than ever before, which is really amazing given that i was in the process helping them with it.
it is not easy to change yourself over night, but at least knowing what is going on and how you can work on it to get where you wanna be in your life and communications, is the best gift ever.

Amazon Customer

I liked the emphasis about how we can choose to control ...

Reviewed in the United States on September 8, 2016

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I liked the emphasis about how we can choose to control our emotions and reactions, and that control in relationships is destructive. However, I didn't appreciate that it talked of mental illness as completely a choice. It lacks sympathy sometimes, and I got caught up in guilt about my depression, and it worsened my mood slightly. However, I chose to take the good ideas and leave the bad. Overall great book.

Raymond W. Kent

Yet another be here now book.

Reviewed in the United States on November 23, 2015

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A maverick phycologist suggests that your life is based on decisions that you make, therefor make better decisions, and your life will be better. What a novel idea, yet I had to read this book in order to realize this for myself. I suggest that everyone do the same, and stop blaming your problems on other people. Other people did not get you where you are now, you did.

Amazon Customer

Can't say enough good about this book - sensible

Reviewed in the United States on March 24, 2017

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Can't say enough good about this book - sensible, enlightening, practical and kind. Well written and so easily incorporated into one's daily plans and worldview. I find myself thinking of this book throughout the day. Looking forward to Dr. Glasser's next book. I am ordering extra copies for Christmas presents. Very helpful for dealing with teenagers and family members.

Amazon Customer

This book changed my life.

Reviewed in the United States on February 14, 2017

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Therapist recommended this book. Its an easy read, not too technical. I use the knowledge I acquired from this book daily. For the first time ever I feel in control of my life and my anxiety is nonexistent.

Top reviews from other countries

M. L. Mcintyre

Item arrived promptly and secure. Attended a conference where ...

Reviewed in the United Kingdom on April 9, 2016

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Item arrived promptly and secure. Attended a conference where this approach was highlighted. I wanted to explore its approach for myself and for my work with young people. Started the book last week and am finding theory very pertinent and will incorporate into my personal and professional life.

E Cunningham

Loved this book

Reviewed in the United Kingdom on October 18, 2019

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This is a great book. Very readable but deep and thought provoking

Zeus Faber

A light bulb moment

Reviewed in the United Kingdom on October 31, 2011

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Fantastic book that I am in the process of reading for the second time.Lots of thought provoking stuff not least that choice is freedom so we all have freedom, maybe not in terms of where we live or how much money we have, but undoubtedly our attitude to it. I have also read 'positive addiction' & 'getting together & staying together', all fantastic reads. Its funny how we spend all our lives trying to amend other peoples behavior yet we can only amend our own but rarely bother.

mrs patricia mcnabb

Excellent

Reviewed in the United Kingdom on April 7, 2014

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I use this book, as a therapist, frequently with clients. It is lay man friendly, not full of psychobabble and very common sense. It empowers the client on how to manage their lives whether it is depression, anger or relationship management. This book is the tool that was used when I was the client and helped me take responsibility for my life and start to thrive. I graduated with a 2:1 honours degree in counselling and psychotherapy last year.

David Doyle

just what I needed thank you

Reviewed in the United Kingdom on December 31, 2013

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I chose this rating because I thought this is the best product for me and I would recommend it to all my family and friends

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