No wonder Smart Love has gotten media attention galore and was even recommended by Ann Landers. The smart love approach offers a new and better way to steer through the extremes of "tough love" and unbridled permissiveness. Parents and children alike will benefit from these innovative principles for raising happy and responsible adults. The good news is that no matter how unhappy or difficult children may be, it is not too late to create positive, loving relationships.
They show how unrecognized needs for unhappiness are created when parenting styles based on discipline, permissiveness, neglect and/oror excessive expectations condition children to equate unhappiness with love. These learned needs for unhappiness persist into adulthood and lead to maladaptive behaviors including eating disorders, compulsive gambling, disastrous romantic choices, substance abuse, problems at work, work-life balance issues, and more.