Showing titles in Humor

Hefty Hugh and Lanky Len are two crafty robbers with a cunning plan to steal the farmer’s fine prize cow. But little do they know that the tiniest, quietest creature of all has overhead their plot, and she has a plan of her own.... What the Ladybird Heard is a fantastically funny story from the stellar partnership of Julia Donaldson and Lydia Monks. With brilliant rhyming verse read by Alexander Armstrong, this much-loved modern classic is perfect story for listening to together. This audio edition of the story features a read-along track and a song for lots of farmyard fun.

When Slappy, the world's most evil ventriloquist dummy, shows up after being abandoned by his previous owner, things start to go wrong around the house. But this time, Slappy may have met his match. There's another bad doll who loves to make a mess of things. Everyone better watch out for this imperfect couple.

When Hank the Cowdog sticks his nose where it doesn't belong - into an old pipe behind the machine shed - he gets more than he bargained for. Before he can say "boy howdy", Hank gets a nip that sets his eyes a-watering and his snouta-throbbing.

In book five of her enthralling adventures, Nanny Piggins discovers some startling truths about the ruthless Ringmaster, provides counselling to a Molavadinian princess with pre-wedding jitters, inadvertently wins a Nobel Prize while impersonating her sister and catches up with her favourite 4-tonne friend, Esmeralda the forgetful elephant.

Let's face it. Greg Heffley will never change his wimpy ways. In The Last Straw, book 3 of the Diary of a Wimpy Kid series from #1 international bestselling author Jeff Kinney, somebody just needs to explain that to Greg's father. You see, Frank Heffley actually thinks he can get his son to toughen up, and he enlists Greg in organized sports and other "manly" endeavors. Of course, Greg is able to easily sidestep his father's efforts to change him. But when Greg's dad threatens to send him to military academy, Greg realizes he has to shape up . . . or get shipped out.

Sometimes I take an opportunity to say good-bye to the cattle and wish them a safe journey. "Well, good-bye, you morons. It was nice having you here at the ranch, but it'll be even nicer having you gone. You ate all our grass and taking care of you was a pain in the neck. Good-bye, good riddance, and don't ever come back."

Gertrude, Eugenia, and Dee-Dee Porch do not belong. They don’t belong in the snooty town of Antiquarium, where all girls have to go to etiquette school and the only dog allowed is the bichon frise. They don’t belong with their adoptive family, where all their cousins are named Lavinia and their Aunt has more brooches than books. And they certainly don’t belong at Mrs. Wintermacher’s etiquette school—they’re far more interested in science. After getting kicked out of the last etiquette school that would take them, the girls expect to be sent away for good...

The New York Times best selling cartoonist behind the nationally acclaimed comic strip Pearls Before Swine, Stephan Pastis has won raves for Timmy Failure, the hilarious first book in a new series for young listeners. With the help of a polar bear named Total, Timmy Failure hopes to strike it rich by running the best detective agency around. The only problem is that our supremely confident hero is often more bumbling than brainy.

It is strange enough that Odo and Eleanor have stumbled upon a sword in a dried-up river outside their village. It is even stranger that Odo is able to remove it from where it's buried. And it's remarkably strange when the sword starts to talk. Odo and Eleanor have unearthed Biter, a famous fighter from earlier times. By finding Biter, Odo instantly becomes a knight - a role he is exquisitely unsuited for. Eleanor, however, would make a perfect knight - but she's not the one with the sword.

A super-duper dog show is Brother and Sister Bear’s greatest idea yet. What could possibly go wrong? Find out what happens when Too-Tall and the gang decide to crash the big show. This engaging audio chapter book features all your favorite Berenstain Bear family and friends. Dogs large and small will do amazing tricks. Dr. Hairball, the vet, will judge. The Arfo Dog Biscuit Company has even agreed to give out prizes to each and every dog. It’s sure to be the best dog show ever...or is it?

Uncle Bart reckons humans don't hate cane toads, but Limpy knows they do. He's spotted the signs. The cross looks. The unkind comments. The way they squash cane toads with their cars. Limpy is desperate to save his family from ending up as placemats. Somehow he must make humans see how nice cane toads really are.

Only one more week until book number five in the Nightmare on Zombie Street series comes out. When it does, Stink will be first in line at the bookstore to buy his copy and join the town’s Midnight Zombie Walk! Until then, Stink and his friends keep busy, working on zombie costumes and racking up points for the race to One Million Minutes of Reading. With all that talk about the undead, Stink starts to wonder: Is he being hunted by zombies?

Gooney Bird Greene has a fabulous idea after her teacher reads fables to the class. The children learn that fables are stories with animal characters that teach something important. Gooney’s fabulous idea is that each student create their own fable and tell it to the class! Everyone but Nicholas is excited about their stories and costumes. Can Gooney Bird find out why Nicholas is unhappy and get him to join in the fun? Now that would be truly fabulous!

Growing up in the shadow of his football star brother, Chris, Newt Newman has never felt particularly special. When Chris is knocked into a coma, Newt's two best friends decide that taking him out for Halloween is the best way to cheer him up. Using some of Chris's old, oversized clothes, Newt creates his best costume ever - Captain Nobody!

What do Real Pigeons do? They EAT DANGER, of course! This squad of crime-fighting feathered friends is nonstop action and nonstop laughs. Watch them as they infiltrate a secret warehouse full of bottled birds and take down a truly criminal ostrich. The DANGER is REAL. And so are the REAL PIGEONS.

Stacy Friedman is getting ready for one of the most important events of her young life—her bat mitzvah. All she wants is the perfect dress to wear, her friends by her side, and her biggest crush ever, Andy Goldfarb, to dance with her (and maybe even make out with her on the dance floor). But Stacy's well-laid plans quickly start to fall apart... Her stressed-out mother forces her to buy a hideous sequined dress that makes her look like the bride of Frankenstein. Her mitzvahs are not going well at all. And then the worst thing in the entire world happens.

Mitch and Amy both think being twins is fun, but that doesn't stop them from squabbling. Amy is good at reading. Mitch is a math whiz. Amy likes to play pretend. Mitch would rather skateboard. They never want to watch the same television show. And they always try to get the better of each other.

The Bailey School soccer team hasn't had a lot of success, but their new coach seems like the woman to help whip them into shape. Coach Graves is a little rough around the edges, but she's good at what she does. That is until a strange old lady turns up at one of their practices. After that, Coach Graves has a vacant look in her eyes, mumbles and groans in response to the kids, and moves like she's back from the dead.

Mr. Macky dresses up as Abraham Lincoln to get the students at Ella Mentry School excited about their Presidents' Day oral reports.

How much trouble could a second-grader cause? Plenty, if it's Horrible Harry. Whether he's making Song Lee scream by showing her his pet snake, or playing a dead fish in the Thanksgiving play, Horrible Harry's just not happy unless he's stirring up trouble. But when one of Harry's classmates tries to get even with him by pasting canary stickers on his chair, lunch box, and library book, a showdown can't be far off.