How much do you know about farts? Did you know it would take just nine farts from every person on earth to power an atomic bomb? That fish farts nearly triggered a war against Russia? That women's farts smell worse than men's? Pfwoort! It's all in this book. Did you know that inhaling farts is healthy, yet people fart after death? That you can get a job as a professional fart smeller? That farting is illegal in Africa but polite in South America? Heard any ancient Babylonian fart jokes lately? Blorrrk! It's all in this book.

Liam Chapman cannot believe his good fortune. He just bought a real, working time machine at a garage sale for $3. Sure, it’s labeled “World’s Worst Time Machine,” but how bad could it be? The time machine, as it turns out, is so much worse than Liam could have imagined. First, it summons Thomas Edison, but not that Thomas Edison. This Thomas Edison is a 10-year-old aspiring gangster from 1933 who demands to be called “Tommy Twinkles” and is also very interested in robbing a bank of the future.

My name is Chase Cooper, and I'm a 6th grade ninja. It's my first day at a different school and the only person I know is my cousin, Zoe (but she might be a little too cool for me). I was just another scrawny kid until a group of ninjas recruited me into their clan. It was a world of trouble I wasn't prepared for, which is why I kept this diary (or "chronicle" as my dad would call it) - to warn other kids about the dangers of becoming a ninja. They say history is destined to repeat itself...well, not if I can help it.

Welcome to the town of Smellville, where a dozen kids all live in a big tumbledown house and have as much fun as they possibly can. People may think that they’re gross and weird and strange, but they’re not bad kids - they just don’t know any better. In this hilarious new series from best-selling author R. L. Stine, the Garbage Pail Kids - from Adam Bomb to Brainy Janie - get into mischief at their middle school, all while battling bullies and their archenemies, Penny and Parker Perfect.

When Jason meets his mom’s billion-dollar invention, an artificial intelligence device named Proto, he accidentally gets caught up in a mysterious adventure. Proto goes missing, and then people go missing. Now Jason and his coolest-neighbor-ever Maya must risk their lives to prevent global mayhem. But who is behind this devious plot? Is it another AI? The FBI? Or any other abbreviation with an I? What exactly is there to learn about artificial and human intelligence while fighting for your life against a legion of furry puppies or a battalion of drones?

To five-year-old Jack, Room is the entire world. It is where he was born and grew up; it's where he lives with his Ma as they learn and read and eat and sleep and play. At night, his Ma shuts him safely in the wardrobe, where he is meant to be asleep when Old Nick visits. Room is home to Jack, but to Ma, it is the prison where Old Nick has held her captive for seven years. Through determination, ingenuity, and fierce motherly love, Ma has created a life for Jack. But she knows it's not enough...not for her or for him.

Living and slaving in Fill City One, you get used to the smell. We call it the Everpresent Stink. But every once in a while, on a spring day with a breeze, it clears away enough to remind us that there is something more out there. Most Fillers' wildest dreams would be just to get past the walls and live in the mainland. But my dream? It’s a little bigger. I’m going to Mars.

Sixth grader Greg Heffley doesn't understand his annoying younger brother, obnoxious older one, or well-meaning parents. But he knows enough to record his daily thoughts in a manly journal - not some girly diary. In a unique novel brimming with laugh-out-loud moments, Greg chronicles his first turbulent year of middle school.

Morris College All-Sports Camp has everything 12-year-old Greyson Gray needs to distract him from his father's mysterious disappearance - intense athletic competition, weird friends, and a pretty girl. But when Greyson stumbles upon a terrorist's sinister plot brewing in the observatory, a place already haunted by a chilling camp legend, he suddenly toils with two dueling worlds - one of lurking danger and mystery, the other of competition and awkward romance.

Rebekah Daniels is always excited about something. Most of the time, it's anything at all to do with solving a mystery. Now, she's super excited to be going to a brand-new school with her best friend, Mouse. But so far, her first day isn't starting out so well. She really couldn't help running into the janitor, because how would she get to class in time without running? But, the bigger question remains.... That janitor had shown up in the hall out of nowhere! Rebekah is sure of it. So, now she has her first fifth-grade mystery to solve, and it's a big one!

Before Jake’s grandfather died, he was on the trail of a centuries-old mystery. And he has entrusted that mystery to Jake, leaving behind a set of hidden codes, riddles, maps, and other clues that lead Jake and his friends on a scavenger hunt into the heart of Colorado’s wild and rugged Rocky Mountain National Park.

When a four-inch-tall alien crash-lands through Zack McGee's bedroom window, Zack is sure he's about to become the first victim in a new War of the Worlds. But when the alien turns out to have weapons that are more ticklish than terrifying, Zack realizes that it's up to him to protect the alien in his pocket from the world. Like every audiobook in the Alien in My Pocket series, Blast Off! mixes Common Core - aligned science and safe, hands-on experiments with hilarious stories that young listeners will love.

The destinies of a 12-year-old boy and an alien man become inextricably linked as they go on the run from government agents and a shape-shifting enemy. The Alien Skill series is a science fiction adventure story for fans of Percy Jackson, A Wrinkle in Time, and Lost in Space. The young at heart will revel in this family-friendly, action-packed series filled with alien powers, engaging characters, and a riveting "alien" hunt.

Fourteen-year-old Ronan Boyle is the youngest and lowliest recruit to the secret Garda, an Irish police force that handles the misdeeds of numerous magical creatures. Ronan's parents are in jail, but Ronan is convinced they were framed by the wee people. So, despite his small size, poor eyesight, and social awkwardness, he's determined to learn all he can in the Garda in order to prove his parents' innocence.  

Jaques Papier has the sneaking suspicion that everyone except his sister Fleur hates him. Teachers ignore him when his hand is raised in class, he is never chosen for sports teams, and his parents often need to be reminded to set a place for him at the dinner table. But he is shocked when he finally learns the truth: He is Fleur's imaginary friend! When he convinces Fleur to set him free, he begins a surprising and touching, and always funny quest to find himself - to figure out who Jacques Papier truly is, and where he belongs.

When Murph Cooper rocks up to his new school, he can't help but feel a bit out of his depth. And it's not because he's worried about where to sit, and making friends, and fitting in, or not knowing where the loos are. It's because his mum has enrolled him at a school for superheroes by mistake. And unlike his fellow students Murph has no special abilities whatsoever. But just because you don't have superpowers, it doesn't mean you can't save the day....

It all started with a peanut butter cup...which leads Ben Braver to a secret school for kids with super abilities. Ben has never had any special powers - and maybe never will. But could this be his chance to become the superhero he's always dreamed of? The Super Life of Ben Braver is the first book in a hilarious adventure series about the greatness that lies within any middle schooler who dreams big from Marcus Emerson, the author of the smash hit Diary of a 6th Grade Ninja series.

Living and slaving in Fill City One, you get used to the smell. We call it the Everpresent Stink. But every once in a while, on a spring day with a breeze, it clears away enough to remind us that there is something more out there. Most Fillers' wildest dreams would be just to get past the walls and live in the mainland. But my dream? It’s a little bigger. I’m going to Mars.

In Ysabeau S. Wilce's exciting debut novel, Flora's mom is away, leaving Flora and her father home alone at Crackpot Hall with its 11,000 constantly shifting rooms. Late for school one day, Flora decides to take the elevator down to the first floor. But without her mother around, the elevator has ideas of its own and drops Flora in an unfamiliar room. Lost in her own house, Flora embarks on a harrowing quest to find her way back to where she started.

Nicola Berry's life is turned upside down the day a man from another planet comes to Earth on a strange mission. He's looking for somebody to travel back to his home planet and convince their stuck-up princess not to turn Earth into her planet's giant garbage dump. When Nicola is chosen as the Earthling Ambassador, she's not sure that she's up to the task. Can Nicola and her friends save the planet in time? Or will the nasty Princess Petronella cover Earth in a galactic ton of garbage?

My name is Chase Cooper, and I'm a 6th grade ninja. It's my first day at a different school and the only person I know is my cousin, Zoe (but she might be a little too cool for me). I was just another scrawny kid until a group of ninjas recruited me into their clan. It was a world of trouble I wasn't prepared for, which is why I kept this diary (or "chronicle" as my dad would call it) - to warn other kids about the dangers of becoming a ninja. They say history is destined to repeat itself...well, not if I can help it.

Zoe Guire just talked to an elephant. Well, technically speaking, the elephant spoke to her, but either way it was weird and, as a rule, Zoe doesn't do weird. Except the thing is, when Zoe goes along on her mom's business trip to India, things get very weird, very quickly. Soon after she arrives, Zoe finds herself tagging alongside a kid named Zak, lost in a crazy city, with no money and no way home.

After a botched escape plan from her boarding school, Abigail is stunned to discover the school is actually a cover for an elite spy ring called The Center, along with being training grounds for future spies. Even more shocking? Abigail's mother is a top agent for The Center and she has gone MIA, with valuable information that many people would like to have - at any cost. Along with a former nemesis and charming boy from her grade, Abigail goes through a crash course in Spy Training 101, often with hilarious - and sometimes painful - results.

Once upon a time (right about now) there was a planet (how about this one?) whose inhabitants consumed 36 billion gallons of beer each year (it's a fact, you can Google it). Among those affected, each in his or her own way, by all the bubbles, burps, and foam, was a smart, wide-eyed, adventurous kindergartner named Gracie; her distracted mommy; her insensitive dad; her non-conformist uncle; and a magical, butt-kicking intruder from a world within our world.

Funny Business is based around the theme of - what else? - humor, and if you’re familiar with Jon and the Guys Read Library, you already know what you’re in store for: 10 hilarious stories from some of the funniest writers around. Before you’re through, you’ll meet a teenage mummy; a kid desperate to take a dip in the world’s largest pool of chocolate milk; a homicidal turkey; parents who hand over their son’s room to a biker; and more.

24/7 Demon Mart: Publisher's Pack features two books from the 24/7 Demon Mart series: The Graveyard Shift, book one, and Monster Burger, book two. It also includes the bonus Hell for the Holidays, a 24/7 Demon Mart Christmas special. Lloyd Wallace is the most clueless crossing guard the intersection of hell and earth has ever seen. So clueless, that he doesn't even realize the beer cave in the corner store where he works is the gateway to hell.

Ten-year-old cousins Jesse and Daisy have always wanted something magical to happen to them. So it's a dream come true when Jesse's newly found thunder egg hatches and a helpless, tiny (but very loud) baby dragon pops out. Jesse names the bright green dragon Emmy, short for Emerald. Soon the two kids are at Emmy's beck and call, trying to figure out what to feed her. An Internet search leads them to the library and then back to the Internet, where they find a strange Web site called foundadragon.org.

In Scarborough, a low-income urban neighborhood, three kids struggle to rise above poverty, abuse, and a system that consistently fails them. The adults in their lives either rise to the occasion or fall by the wayside; together, they make up a troubled yet inspired community that refuses to be undone.

For years Chuck Palahniuk has reserved his best storytelling for his readings, often choosing to read a new short story instead of whatever novel he is supposed to be promoting. Make Something Up compiles these previously unpublished tales for the very first time, plus the Byliner social media insta-classic "Phoenix" and Palahniuk's most notable pieces from Playboy.

Meet Holling Hoodhood, a seventh-grader at Camillo Junior High who must spend Wednesday afternoons with his teacher, Mrs. Baker, while the rest of the class has religious instruction. Mrs. Baker doesn’t like Holling - he’s sure of it. Why else would she make him read the plays of William Shakespeare outside class? But everyone has bigger things to worry about, like Vietnam.