This Book Is Full of Spiders

Seriously, Dude, Don't Touch It (John Dies at the End, Book 2)

By: David Wong

Narrated by: Nick Podehl

From David Wong, the writer of the cult sensation John Dies at the End comes another terrifying and hilarious tale of almost Armageddon at the hands of two hopeless heroes.

Warning: You may have a huge, invisible spider living in your skull. THIS IS NOT A METAPHOR.

You will dismiss this as ridiculous fear-mongering. Dismissing things as ridiculous fear-mongering is, in fact, the first symptom of parasitic spider infection - the creature stimulates skepticism, in order to prevent you from seeking a cure. That's just as well, since the "cure" involves learning what a chainsaw tastes like. You can't feel the spider, because it controls your nerve endings. You won't even feel it when it breeds. And it will breed.

Just stay calm, and remember that telling you about the spider situation is not the same as having caused it. I'm just the messenger. Even if I did sort of cause it. Either way, I won't hold it against you if you're upset. I know that's just the spider talking.

"Like an episode of AMC's "The Walking Dead" written by Douglas Adams of "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy." …Imagine a mentally ill narrator describing the zombie apocalypse while drunk, and the end result is unlike any other book of the genre. Seriously, dude, touch it and read it." –Washington Post

"Kevin Smith's Clerks meets H.P. Lovecraft in this exceptional thriller… David Wong (Jason Pargin) is a fantastic author with a supernatural talent for humor. If you want a poignant, laugh-out-loud funny, disturbing, ridiculous, self-aware, socially relevant horror novel than This Book is Full of Spiders: Seriously Dude, Don't Touch It is the one and only book for you." –SF Signal

©2012 David Wong (P)2012 Brilliance Audio, Inc.

Holy Velvet Jesus Painting, My Jimmies Are Rustled

This book is better written then David Wong's last novel, John Dies At The End. Which was a fun read. Unlike his last, when the plot ambles, it's more on purpose, concise, cleaner, and he doesn't use periods of gross out horror slapstick to cover weak points in the story. There's still gross out horror, but it's intuitive. I mean, it's a book about sentient spiders. Uggghhuuuhhuuherr Blahhhh, my skin is crawling!

I can't remember the last time I was wide awake at 4 AM glaring at shadows in my room, certain that they would suddenly move. Maybe when I was eight? Or since the last time I watched Army of Darkness?

Don't judge. It was scary. I normally don't like horror, but when you get midway through this book you almost have to keep listening, you have to have the narrator tell you that the spiders are taken care of, and that everything will be okay. It's that well written. This book was like a literary roller coaster, terrifying, with just the right kind of humor and humanity to make it exciting. There are some really good intuitions of the human condition, including Wong's take on the Babel Effect, without getting too preachy. The alternate point of views is really interesting, as you get to see situations from every perspective. I would definitely recommend this book.

I absolutely loved this book

the performance was amazing! the story was great, this is easily my favorite audiobook. I play this in the car for my friends that use to think audio books were lame. my buddy listened for ten hours straight on our way to denver. he kept asking me to put the story back on

Deep thought wrapped in comic horror

Love his works. Just as with John Dies at the End, deep thought is wrapped in comedic horror fiction. The Dunbar Number and how that applies to stereotype, our affinity to loving to hate zombies, and the thoughts contained therein were wonderful, thought provoking ideas wrapped neatly into an easy to read story.

awesome

great mix of dark and suspenseful planar fiction, dark humor, and just the right amount of occasional fart and dick jokes

Enjoyed it thoroughly

The story was very imaginative shifting in ways to keep the reader interested and guessing. The performance was on point and definitely assisted in my own imagining and understanding of the story. I have a few minor complaints though. It felt a little less connected than the first novel and I felt a sense of some loose ends lingering about. Overall, if you like silly, horrifying, thought-provoking, cringe-inducing stories, this is for you.