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Heads in Beds: A Reckless Memoir of Hotels, Hustles, and So-Called Hospitality | [Jacob Tomsky]
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Heads in Beds: A Reckless Memoir of Hotels, Hustles, and So-Called Hospitality

  • UNABRIDGED
  • by Jacob Tomsky
  • Narrated by Jacob Tomsky
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  • Regular Price :$24.50
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  • Average Customer Rating
  • Overall
    (206)
    Performance
    (193)
    Story
    (195)
 
  • LENGTH
    8 hrs and 8 mins
  • RELEASE DATE
    11-20-12
  • AUDIO FORMATS
    About Audio Formats
    2 3 4 Enhanced Audio
 

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Publisher's Summary

In the tradition of Kitchen Confidential and Waiter Rant, a rollicking, eye-opening, fantastically indiscreet memoir of a life spent (and misspent) in the hotel industry.

Jacob Tomsky has worked in hotels for more than a decade, doing everything from valet parking to manning the front desk. He's checked you in, checked you out, separated your white panties from the white bed sheets, parked your car, tasted your room service, cleaned your toilet, denied you a late check out, given you a wake-up call, eaten M&Ms out of your mini-bar, laughed at your jokes, and taken your money. And in Heads in Beds, he pulls back the curtain on the hospitality business, revealing the crazy yet compelling reality of an industry we think we know. It is an incredibly funny, authentic, and irreverent chronicle of the highs and lows of hotel life and boy, is there a market for it: in 2010, the American lodging industry generated $127.7 billion in revenue. Prepare to be amused, shocked, and amazed as he spills the unwritten code of the bellhops, the antics that go on the valet parking garage, and the housekeeping department's dirty little secrets.

Prepare to be moved, too, by his insightful honesty about the profession; employees are often poorly paid and frequently abused. However, Heads in Beds is more than just a memoir. Jake explains the secrets of the industry, offering easy and legal ways to get what you need from your hotel without any hassle - from scoring late check-ins and upgrades to getting that pay-per-view charge knocked off your bill. This book will give you the knowledge you need to get the very best service from any hotel or property, from any business that makes its money from putting heads in beds. Or, at the very least, it will keep the bellhops from taking your luggage into the camera-free back office and stomping the crap out of it.

©2012 Jacob Tomsky (P)2012 Random House Audio

What the Critics Say

"Jacob Tomsky is a star. The kid writes like a dream. Heads in Beds is hilarious, literate, canny, indignant and kind - revealing an author who manages somehow to be both a total hustler and a complete humanitarian. I love this book. Keep an eye on this writer. I'm telling you, he's a star." (Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman's Search for Everything Across Italy, India and Indonesia)

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

4.1 (206 ratings)
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Overall
4.0 (195 ratings)
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4.2 (193 ratings)
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Performance
  •  
    Abigail URBANA, IL, United States 12-03-12
    Abigail URBANA, IL, United States 12-03-12 Member Since 2012
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Funny, honest writing."

    I love that the author read it because you are experiencing the moments as he intended. I think anyone who has ever had any job in a service industry would completely appreciate this book. The writing is crass at times but that is how people talk. People who are not ok with crass or crude humor should probably not read this.... or work at a hotel. I love crude, honest, and brutal humor and real-life observations and telling it like it is so I absolutely loved this book.

    3 of 3 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Grant NANTUCKET, MA, United States 03-10-13
    Grant NANTUCKET, MA, United States 03-10-13 Member Since 2008

    caffeinated

    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "The presidential suite of audiobooks"

    I travel on business a lot. I stay in hotels over 150 nights a year. This book was not only entertaining and a pleasure to listen to (Thomsky is a natural reader/actor/performer), it gave me some real insight and tips for how I should approach my stays in hotels. Funny as hell. Full of interesting stories. And the author experienced something of a dramatic arc from beginning to end. Very well done.

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Rachel Bremerton, WA, United States 01-04-13
    Rachel Bremerton, WA, United States 01-04-13 Member Since 2012
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    "If only it was longer....."
    Would you consider the audio edition of Heads in Beds to be better than the print version?

    Not sure but I would assume yes due to the amazing performance by the author. Knowing his own characters he brought them to life in a way that I would not have been so bold to create myself.


    Which character – as performed by Jacob Tomsky – was your favorite?

    All of them. Seriously.


    If you were to make a film of this book, what would be the tag line be?

    -tip the usher on the way in :)


    Any additional comments?

    This storys characters came alive. It was almost a mistake to listen to this at work as I had a couple close calls of "coffee sprayed monitor" due to the amazing writing and narration. Ne'er again will I say the oh so ignorant phrase "I don't want to trouble him" and just say "No thank you, I appreciate the offer".

    Thankfully I have always learned to book through the actual hotel. I rebelled against hotels a while back due to expensive rooms and usually sub-par service, opting to spend a couple extra dollars on a B&B (they are always happy to see you but not so great for epically loud sex).


    Also a cool shout out to The Las Vegas Hard Rock for having exceptional concierge. I really hope my husband tipped them for bringing my drunk ass up to the hotel room that night I got lost. Stay in their suite tower, drop the extra coin as I assure you, they are amazeballs.

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  •  
    dustin OAK HARBOR, WA, United States 11-29-12
    dustin OAK HARBOR, WA, United States 11-29-12 Member Since 2007
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    "Outstanding book and even better narration!"
    Where does Heads in Beds rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

    This book in its category ranks in the top two.


    Who was your favorite character and why?

    Torn between the author and the bellman/doorman.


    What does Jacob Tomsky bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?

    His very real voice I.e. the street talk.


    Any additional comments?

    Truly a great listen one of about three books I was able to listen to straight thru, the author was an amazing narrator as well. Opened my eyes into a service I love to use but always wondered how to improve my stays, and more importantly how not to behave.

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Karen Wanaque, NJ, USA 02-12-13
    Karen Wanaque, NJ, USA 02-12-13 Member Since 2006
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    "A Bit Juvenile, But Some Good Info"
    What disappointed you about Heads in Beds?

    The writer gave some useable, laughable tips for regular hotel users, although I can't see how I'll ever use ghetto names for hundred dollar bills, either at home or in my travels. Generally, this is just so much juvenile macho "grooming" by a very young man. Everybody at some point thinks the world will be fascinated by their tales at work. This is no different. Nobody over a certain age wants to read about drinking, drugging and general mayhem in a twenty-something's life as a hotel staffer. I hope the writer's next book appeals to a wider, more mature (by that I mean over 18) audience. Also, the writer read the book, himself, in a not very appealing way. Maybe somebody else could have made this work.


    What could Jacob Tomsky have done to make this a more enjoyable book for you?

    Maybe if he'd approached his subject matter with a bit more maturity and allowed someone else, a professional reader, do the narrative, it might have been more enjoyable


    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Laurie Florence, KY, United States 02-09-13
    Laurie Florence, KY, United States 02-09-13 Member Since 2005
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Just let me sleep, thanks"

    I had heard alot about this book, so I thought I might pick up some great tips for traveling. Turns out, it's just a ho hum tell-all written by a whiny ex hotel worker. His big insight? Tip well. Gee, thanks!

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Matthew Torrance, CA, United States 01-07-13
    Matthew Torrance, CA, United States 01-07-13 Member Since 2013
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    "Great book, great narration - couldn't get better"
    If you could sum up Heads in Beds in three words, what would they be?

    Was fantastic, interesting, engaging and really worth the liste.


    Who was your favorite character and why?

    Tommy (main character). Was extremely funny and interesting.


    Which scene was your favorite?

    The whole book!


    Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?

    Just the plain honesty was really moving.


    Any additional comments?

    Fantastic, couldn't have asked for a better book!

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Julian MERRITT ISLAND, FL, United States 01-03-13
    Julian MERRITT ISLAND, FL, United States 01-03-13 Member Since 2012
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    "Wow - Nailed it on the head"

    A Hotello myself I found myself laughing out loud and tearing in other moments. Thank you for your book.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Jim United States 01-02-13
    Jim United States 01-02-13 Member Since 2011
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    "great insight into the hospitality industry"

    Dont pick it up if you are put off by adult language. Otherwise, it is great and it works in the context.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Andy Westport, CT, United States 12-29-12
    Andy Westport, CT, United States 12-29-12 Member Since 2002
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    "simply hilarious"

    A decade or so of stories from a former front line hotel employee. If you've listened to My Korean Deli, this is the equivalent for the hotel business.

    3 of 4 people found this review helpful
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