In The Gifts of Imperfection, Bren Brown, a leading expert on shame, authenticity, and belonging, shares 10 guideposts on the power of Wholehearted Living - a way of engaging with the world from a place of worthiness. Each day we face a barrage of images and messages from society and the media telling us who, what, and how we should be. We are led to believe that if we could only look perfect and lead perfect lives, we'd no longer feel inadequate. So most of us perform, please, and perfect, all the while thinking, "What if I can't keep all of these balls in the air? Why isn't everyone else working harder and living up to my expectations? What will people think if I fail or give up? When can I stop proving myself?"
In The Gifts of Imperfection, Bren Brown, Ph.D., a leading expert on shame, authenticity and belonging, shares what she's learned from a decade of research on the power of Wholehearted Living - a way of engaging with the world from a place of worthiness.
In her 10 guideposts, Brown engages our minds, hearts, and spirits as she explores how we can cultivate the courage, compassion, and connection to wake up in the morning and think, "No matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough," and to go to bed at night thinking, "Yes, I am sometimes afraid, but I am also brave. And, yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable, but that doesn't change the truth that I am worthy of love and belonging."
©2010 Brene Brown (P)2010 Audible, Inc.
"Courage, compassion, and connection: Through Bren's research, observations, and guidance, these three little words can open the door to amazing change in your life." (Ali Edwards, author of Life Artist)
"Bren Brown courageously tackles the dark emotions that get in the way of leading a fuller life; read this book and let some of that courage rub off on you." (Daniel H. Pink, New York Times best-selling author of A Whole New Mind)
"This important book is about the lifelong journey from 'What will people think?' to 'I am enough.' Brown's unique ability to blend original research with honest storytelling makes reading The Gifts of Imperfection like having a long, uplifting conversation with a very wise friend who offers compassion, wisdom, and great advice.' (Harriet Lerner, New York Times best-selling author of The Dance of Anger and The Dance of Connection)
I bought this book after watching an amazing youtube video of her Ted Talk. Unfortunately, I didn’t feel like this book gave me that much more insight than her 15 minute talk did. The author kept referring to herself as a “researcher” but she didn’t include any of her research! She summed her findings up for us, but we didn’t get to hear any of the specifics. Instead, she talked about her own life (which is only semi-interesting). And she also spent a lot of time defining key terms, which also got old after a while. It was nice that she opened up and made the book personal, but it would have been more compelling to hear about other people’s stories and experiences (such as all those people she was supposedly researching) to help illustrate her points. Using her own life as the only example came acrosss as self-involved, and it really limited the whole scope of the book. She should have included her own story in the introduction as a way of framing her main points and then delved into the research in the body of the book.
I really enjoyed the authors humor throughout.
I have heard the author's talk on TED (highly recommended) so I have heard her speak and really enjoy her speaking style. She has a snappy, dry wit that would have been most enjoyable to listen to. But the reader's voice is pleasant.
This book came along at a perfect time for me. I have been accompanied by shame my entire life, this book showed me how to process shame and negativity instead of carrying them around with me. It not only discussed the topic but showed me new ways to move forward. I can truly say I am and my relationships are better for having listened to this book and I will listen over and over.
P.S. To the reviewers point about the book dealing too heavily with children and family issues. I do not have children and found it perfectly enjoyable and was able to extrapolate the point the author was trying to make. It is not a book on or about family. It's about how we choose to live our lives. The author has children and that is the paradigm she speaks from. It by no means diminishes the meaning for those of us without.
One thing I must say is that I do NOT like this rating system...this work is not a novel, and what does performance mean? The work is based on Brown's research. It expands on the YouTube videos. I wish we could all have the courage to work though the issues that she puts to paper (so to speak). I have read this book much the same way as I do many of the books like this, which are in my library--helter skelter and then go back to the beginning and read it beginning to end.
I study this work from a slightly different angle. Our imperfections are our gifts--what we bring to the table to make this a better place to live. Reading with an open heart is essential otherwise the person walks away disappointed and put off. Brown's work is not a how to. Her work does give real to life examples that requires us to listen and then do the work--does it speak to you and if so then search for your solution and do your work. She makes visible the shift of consciousness. Well worth the time.
I've never read the print version
Absolutely. Love her sense of humor, the obvious amount of research she puts into her subject matter, and how she personalizes all of that into a very down-to-earth, intelligent book about how to get over yourself and live life more fully.
She gives lots of quotes from other authors, recommends their books, gives a pep talk but in a non-corny way (for the most part). I did get a little tired of the repetitious "How do you dig deep?" I could have done without ever hearing that more than once and it's throughout the entire book. Along with that question is the "breakdown/, strike that, spiritual breakthrough" or something like that. You'd think I would remember but I think I purposely blocked it out because it was sorta but not really funny the first time I heard it. It was making me want to throw things out my window at other cars on the freeway by the hundredth time I'd heard it. Which is a a little bit against what I'm trying to learn here - to be a little more patient with other people and myself. I'm wanting to free myself of some bad habits at work, home, and in my head. It's a special little playground for my sickest thoughts. She gave really good advice with excellent research and references to back up what she was saying.
I felt as though she was a good friend of mine siting in the backyard telling life stories together. It just was't my turn yet but it didn't matter because I was transfixed by her and her descriptions of how she came to her realizations personally and professionally. The narrator was so good that I thought it was actually the author until I looked to see for myself. This was very inspiring in a barefoot in the backyard drinkin a brew and talkin with my girlfriend kinda way. Except this girlfriend is sober, funny, unbelievably intelligent and caring.
kinda like most of my girlfriends are anyway. :)
Not that I know of
I didn't want to stop listening and actually enjoyed my 2.5 hour commute yesterday morning coming in to work rather than trying to stay awake and in a positive frame of mind while battling Houston rush-hour traffic.
Loved it! Definitely gonna listen to another one of Brene' Brown's books and I'll probably look up some other stuff the narrator has done too. I loved her voice.
I am a retired social worker/psychotherapist/group therapist. I am also a qualified senior flight instructor. I served as an air traffic control officer in the Australian Air Force during the Vietnam War. I am a keen sea-kayaker. I recently completed a Master's degree and am working towards a PhD.
This book is a must for anyone serious about becoming a more authentic human being. The content is not merely the author's opinion, it based on scientifically riqorous research conducted by the author. It is not only enlightening but also entertaining. The author courageously illustrates her points with examples from her own life. This is a book to be listened to over and over again.
There are no useful real-world coping mechanisms in this book. The book isn't much about dealing with imperfections in the world. Rather its a meandering stroll through an academic's insecurities about being a scholar, public speaker, writer, and parent.
After DIG deep hours and hours of fluff, some of which tangentially had to do with DIG deep.
Frame the content of the book in an outline rather than what appeared to be stream of conscious writing
I liked the way she poked and prodded at what wholehearted living is. She does it in an entertaining way using many personal stories that you can relate to. Wholehearted living is about engaging in our lives from a place of worthiness. Her expertise as a researcher on shame, authenticity, and belonging gives her experiences more depth. This is not a how to guide and she raises as many questions as she answers. Highly recommend this audio and her Ted Talks.
practicing psychotherapist interested in therapy, psychology, and recommendations for those seeking happiness, practical solutions, and understanding
Brene Brown is one of my favorite researchers in the field of emotional study. The Gifts of Imperfection is a great illustration of what it means to life a full life along with operational goals and definitions of words like shame, authenticity, and vulerability. She uses anecdotes and research to make these points in a powerful way.
My only disappointment with the audio book is the narrator, who is not at all a bad narrator, just isn't at all like Brene Brown. Like many people, I became aware of Brene Brown's work after her TED talk went viral ("The Power of Vulnerability") in June 2010. Her voice and way of speaking is moving and powerful to say the least. I was disappointed not to hear her voice on the audiobook since she's inspiring, funny, and kind of comforting to me.
**Campaign for Brene Brown to read her audio books!!** Other than that, I loved it :)
Entrepreneur, marketer, Zen Buddhist.
If you'd like to listen to one person's tale of overcoming their large array of minor addictions, going into therapy, having a breakdown, and learning to let go of being who she thinks she is supposed to be, you may very well get a lot out of this book.
However, this book is positioned as the work of "a leading expert on shame, authenticity, and belonging" who "shares what she's learned from a decade of research". Nearly all of the research she shares is her own personal story. She makes occasional references to her academic research with what other experience, giving some short summaries. She doesn't give details about anybody else's experience. It's all about Brene Brown.
If you are a lot like the author, whom I'd describe as a woman who is more wrapped up in her own feeling states than most people are, this book may be just wonderful for you. If you're not, if you're seeking actual research findings, if you're looking for insights that are more broadly applicable, pass this book by.
I got this book after listening to Brene Brown's wonderful TED talk. There is nothing more in this book than in the talk, except that the talk was 20 minutes long or so and this book is over 4 hours.
That being said, this book does serve the purpose of a good pick-you-up for someone feeling down. Its message is feel good about yourself, no one is perfect, you are good enough. There's nothing really wrong or arguable with that.
There are two things that did bother me. At some point she says to be happy all people MUST do creative art work. I don't agree and don't know why she says that. Also she talks a lot about how terribly she reacts to criticism, how devastated she was when some random person didn't like a photo she'd taken, which I felt was kind of like trying to manipulate me into not writing a bad review, it didn't work!
The reading was very good.
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