Almost everyone has heard of or knows someone who is part of a verbally abusive relationship--if they're not involved in one themselves. In The Verbally Abusive Relationship, you'll find validation and understanding--it's not "all in your head"--and encouragement for your efforts to change the situation.
Author Patricia Evans explores the damaging effects of verbal abuse on children and the family, and offers valuable insight and recommendations to therapists, as well as those who seek therapeutic support.
©1996 Patricia Evans; (P)2008 Listen & Live Audio, Inc.
"A ground-breaking book." (Newsweek)
"This is a new day in America. The most important thing is to realize is that you don't deserve to be treated that way." (Oprah Winfrey)
"A great, great book." (Sonya Friedman, CNN)
I could never say enough about Patricia Evans and her work in the field of verbal abuse. She understands it so fully and explains it so simply that the fog you had about it becomes a clear understanding that gives you the tools to go forward. She has helped me and countless others. I am sure you will enjoy this and take away a clearer mind on the subject, that by nature is extremely confusing and frustrating.
Helpful book as I seek help on the topic.
It helped me to develop a language for the issues I face and realize I too can be verbally abusive.
As a man who lives with an abuser I was really disappointed that is was so one sided. Abusers and victims are both sexes but this book assumed that it was the male abusing every time which did get tiring. Over all a very helpful book. I would rate it a 7/10 and if the sexist issue was resolves a 9.5/10
This book is very enlightening on the subject. It helped me to have more equality in my relationship, and gave me the tools to put a stop to the verbal abuse I was subjected too.
Although written from a woman's perspective, I consider the book to apply for both genders, and therefore useful for both. One needs to read and apply it with discernment as SOME of her advice can lead him/her to become verbally abusive, themselves. One the other hand I find many of her suggestions quite helpful. It tends to have a negative tone but... I do recommend this book to both men and women, single or married. Just make sure you do not allow yourself to be instigated to anger. Just stand your ground and try to differentiate yourself from the abuser.
My mom shared this book with me after finding out I was in a verbally abusive relationship. It saved me. I don't know where I go from here, but I'm free to know I'm not wrong to have felt abused and I've started using the techniques in the book. To my surprise, it's working.
I am a psychologist and was looking for a resource to recommend to my clients. The author presents the information clearly. This is a good resource for professionals and non-professionals. Yes, I will listen to this book again and discuss the concepts with my clients as they read it as well.
This book was recommended by my therapist. I don't usually leave a review but this one has helped me so much, I would love to help another. I never thought I was in an verbally abusive relationship, until I left my ex 2.5 years ago. I've struggled with guilt, regret, questioning myself if I made the right choice, wishing I held on just a little more until it's consumed everything I have left. That's until I listened to this book. I am not alone. You are not alone. Everything I've felt, is normal and is part of "the process". 2 days after feeling the hurt and anger that comes from reading this book, I feel free again. This is the last step in affirming my decisions are validated and worth it. Take notes. I actually listened and just kept writing and writing and writing. that too was therapy. I found myself writing I, him, me...so I immediately related to everything she said and was very helpful! good luck to you I hope this review/book helps you like it did me :)
This book presents an oversimplified argument on the topic of verbal abuse. Some of author's remarks contradict other books/articles I have read. She mention's that:
-Verbal abuse is caused by feelings of powerlessness and fear.
The book "Why Does He Do That?" by Bancroft, however, traces the root of the issue to the abuser's thinking system.
-The partner should defend herself by telling the abuser to "stop it."
This unwise suggestion could be very dangerous as It might provoke the abuser to physically threaten or abuse the partner.
Overall, Evans' faulty definitions and solutions coupled with her disorganized writing style were very disappointing to me. It is difficult for me to understand why my supposedly experienced therapist recommend this book to me.
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