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The Science of Trust Audiobook
The Science of Trust
Written by: 
John M. Gottman
Narrated by: 
J. Charles
The Science of Trust Audiobook

The Science of Trust: Emotional Attunement for Couples

Regular Price:$17.49
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Publisher's Summary

For the past 35 years, John Gottman’s research has been internationally recognized for its unprecedented ability to precisely measure interactive processes in couples and to predict the long-term success or failure of relationships. In this groundbreaking book, he presents a new approach to understanding and changing couples: a fundamental social skill called “emotional attunement,” which describes a couple’s ability to fully process and move on from negative emotional events, ultimately creating a stronger relationship.

Gottman draws from this longitudinal research and theory to show how emotional attunement can downregulate negative affect, help couples focus on positive traits and memories, and even help prevent domestic violence. He offers a detailed intervention devised to cultivate attunement, thereby helping couples connect, respect each other, and show affection. Emotional attunement is extended to tackle the subjects of flooding, the story we tell ourselves about our relationship, conflict, personality, changing relationships, and gender. Gottman also explains how to create emotional attunement when it is missing, to lay a foundation that will carry the relationship through difficult times.

Gottman encourages couples to cultivate attunement through awareness, tolerance, understanding, non-defensive listening, and empathy. These qualities, he argues, inspire confidence in couples, and the sense that despite the inevitable struggles, the relationship is enduring and resilient.

This book, an essential follow-up to his 1999 The Marriage Clinic, offers therapists, students, and researchers a detailed intervention for working with couples, and offers couples a roadmap to a stronger future together.

©2012 John M. Gottman (P)2012 Brilliance Audio, Inc.

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

4.2 (120 )
5 star
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4.0 (104 )
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4.0 (106 )
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Performance
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  •  
    Jesse 04-07-15
    Jesse 04-07-15 Member Since 2015
    HELPFUL VOTES
    5
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    "Every married man should read this book."

    This book and the 7 principles book have been vital tools in my efforts to save my marriage from my emotional distance and neglect. I recommend it to all men and women who want a committed relationship, period.

    5 of 5 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Garry United States 10-08-15
    Garry United States 10-08-15 Member Since 2014
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Very detailed and thorough, but not an easy listen"

    While the information included was very detailed and thorough, it was a difficult book to listen to because it was very academic and scientific in nature. There was some application, but it got lost amongst the definitions and figures. As long as you go in with the right expectations, you'll be OK, but if, like me, you were expecting more of a how-to in easy to understand layman's terms, you're better off looking elsewhere.

    3 of 3 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Amazon Customer Cleveland, OH USA 04-10-13
    Amazon Customer Cleveland, OH USA 04-10-13 Member Since 2015

    Dragon Mama

    HELPFUL VOTES
    12
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    "Like having tables of data read out loud?"
    What would have made The Science of Trust better?

    It would have helped significantly if the narrator had at least ATTEMPTED to differentiate the voices when reading transcripts of conversations between husbands and wives. Instead, he just keeps reading in his regular voice which is confusing AND annoying. The poor editing job of the written text did not help matters at ALL. This information would have been better presented if it was more concisely presented. It could be cut by at least 25%.


    What do you think your next listen will be?

    I may avoid Gottman's work in audio format after this... I admire his work as an academic, and wanted to learn more after he was mentioned in Gladwell's books, but clearly I need to be able to visually scan through to get to useful bits.


    What didn’t you like about J. Charles’s performance?

    I didn't LIKE anything about J. Charles's performance. Lacking in differentiation between "speakers", and my text-to-speech software on my Android has about as much inflection.


    What reaction did this book spark in you? Anger, sadness, disappointment?

    Disappointment in how crappy an editing job was done. Paragraphs are repeated in several places and the flow of the text is bad. Where the heck were the copy editors in this???


    Any additional comments?

    Gottman is doing important work into human relationships. Please don't let the poor quality of this specific publication keep you from looking into what he's been doing.

    12 of 15 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Earl Vories Dyersburg, TN USA 07-15-15
    Earl Vories Dyersburg, TN USA 07-15-15 Member Since 2015
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Good insight"

    The linking of science and research to issues of trust and marriage adds legitimacy. This book is more like a college textbook.

    My only complaint is the use of multiple variables with similar terminology got confusing, especially because there was no easy way to recheck meanings. Unlike a textbook, there was no easy way to find definitions or to use a chart/graph to help you follow along.

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Robert 04-07-15
    Robert 04-07-15
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Great application of math theory to marriage."
    Would you listen to The Science of Trust again? Why?

    Probably not again because it is 16 hours long.


    What was one of the most memorable moments of The Science of Trust?

    The Zeigarnik Effect. Understanding this alone may save your marriage.


    Which character – as performed by J. Charles – was your favorite?

    N/A


    Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

    No...to long.


    Any additional comments?

    While this book was written for practitioners, I found it great and a lay person.

    3 of 4 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Chris 06-14-16
    Chris 06-14-16 Member Since 2015
    ratings
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    "His best work"

    I've read most of Gottmans books and love him but when I started reading this one I thought it was so boring. It started slow and went deep into game theory. Half way through though it became my favorite book by him with detailed descriptions of his research and finding and in my option his best published work. This book was so helpful!

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Jasper 05-18-16
    Jasper 05-18-16 Member Since 2016
    ratings
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    "A little long winded"

    There were some good ideas, but the mathematical modeling, especially in audio form, was not very engaging to listen to.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    M. Thea Temple Dallas, TX, USA 04-26-16
    M. Thea Temple Dallas, TX, USA 04-26-16 Member Since 2014

    Texus T

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    "Interesting research."

    Much couple's therapy ignores the findings of Gottman, and so it fails. Good companion piece to Terry Real's applied therapy based on personal experience and Gottman.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Luke Morrison Pefferlaw, Ontario 02-29-16
    Luke Morrison Pefferlaw, Ontario 02-29-16 Member Since 2011

    I love Audible. I think Mario Martinez's Audiobook "Mind-Body Code" is my overall favorite so far.

    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Exceptional Work"

    Very detailed and wordy. I suspect most would not make it to the end unless you like discussion on statistics and math combined with social science. The last chapters are the best. IMHO he could have summed them up in the opening chapters and he would have kept more readers interested longer. But this work is amazing. His mathematical theory will change the world. Once it includes outside influencers.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Caleb Martin 01-13-16 Member Since 2015
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Insightful but complicated and abstract at times"

    The author has an incredible understanding of what makes relationships tick. However this book was written for academia and is very dry at points, and I wish it came with his graphs.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
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  • Mr
    12/16/14
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "This book saved my relationship!!!"
    Where does The Science of Trust rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

    Very high in fact it was life changing completely shifted my perspective and made me more solid in my lifes philosphy


    What was one of the most memorable moments of The Science of Trust?

    When I found out the actual secret to couples who make versus those who dont, example one happy couples still make jokes or smile or touch lovingly even when arguing. Happy couples dont escalate by throwing blame at each other and pointing fingers, happy couples state their exact need calmly without anger or blame or shame.


    Which scene did you most enjoy?

    When the doctor said happy couple argue as much as unhappy couples also the exact formula that people should stick to for creating trust


    Did you have an emotional reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

    It made me cry with joy as i was reading it during a time of relationship trouble and as it happens my partner simply did not trust me for whatever reason, she completely reversed her feelings and is now the happiest woman you could ever meet!


    Any additional comments?

    It literally saved my relationship.

    3 of 3 people found this review helpful
  • MR
    Sidcup, United Kingdom
    12/23/12
    Overall
    "Excellent Information for Couples"

    As practising couple therapist in the UK, who trained in Dr Gottman's work I can recommend this book. It contains excellent update on the research the Gottman's have done over the past few decades. And it works in practice. This book provides an introduction and update on their work.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  • Ms
    Versoix, Switzerland
    9/5/14
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Keep calm and read on"
    Would you try another book written by John M. Gottman or narrated by J. Charles?

    Yes


    What did you like best about this story?

    Among the tons of (rather irrelevant) reviews of past research and mathematical equations, hide a few nuggests of wisdom and insight that I found really valuable.


    What do you think the narrator could have done better?

    Not try to play roles in a pretend voice


    Could you see The Science of Trust being made into a movie or a TV series? Who would the stars be?

    ?


    0 of 0 people found this review helpful

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