In this playful and informative exploration of the science behind how to choose a great mate, acclaimed relationship psychologist Dr. Ty Tashiro explores how to find enduring love. Dr. Tashiro translates reams of scientific studies and research data into the first audiobook to revolutionize the way we search for love. His research pinpoints why our decision-making abilities seem to fail when it comes to choosing mates and how we can make smarter choices.
Dr. Tashiro has discovered that if you want a lifetime of happiness - not just togetherness - it all comes down to how you choose a partner in the first place. With wit and insight, he explains the science behind finding a soul mate and distills his research into actionable tips, including:
Illustrated using entertaining stories based on real-life situations and backed by scientific findings from fields such as demography, sociology, medical science and psychology, Dr. Tashiro provides an accessible framework to help singles find their happily-ever-afters.
©2014 Ty Tashiro (P)2014 Audible, Inc.
That list....yea thats non existent after this book. My standards are now based around logic instead of looks, or being taller than me, or making a ton of money, or being so remarkably different than me that they add something special to my life that I cannot. God, none of that crap matters! That's how i feel about it 3 months after finishing it. It still makes sense.
Kind of dry, but a great listen. Lots of relate-able stories about others.
Great book that gives a gery pratical framework for bettee understanding yourself and what drives your behaviour and how to assess potential partners.
Started a bit slow and theoretical but is definitely worth it. Chapter 8 provided a framework that allowed me to instantly tly see myself and my wife's behaviour and understand the underlying dynamics of our behaviour, the way no counselling session ever has. This will truly make a difference in my life. I recommend to every single person and its still useful for people like me that are in a relationship to better understand ourselves and partners and to improve the relationship dynamics.
This book helped straighten out a lot of dating/relationship confusion for me. Sometimes I need processes and data for my big decisions - this book provided both.
This book wasn't great. The main take-home message was that, statistically speaking, you can only reasonably expect to find a partner with 3 'traits' and you need to be careful what traits you pick so you don't end up giving up something you need to be happy for something that you don't. Ok...but what is a 'trait'? That point was never well defined. In theory, any trait could be defined in positive or negative terms (i.e., 'I would like a partner who attractive' or 'I would like a partner who is not unattractive'), and many traits might be better described as an absence of something (i.e., cheating, abuse, etc). So, let's brainstorm possible partner traits. Trustworthy. Non-abusive. Physically mobile (i.e., able to walk). Attractive. Doesn't use drugs. Funny. Respectful to your parents. Rich. Won't cheat on you. Interested in having sex with you. Etc. So, remember you can only pick 3, so let's say you decide that you want a partner who is 1) respectful to your parents, 2) physically mobile, 3) won't cheat on you...does that mean it is OK to put up with an abusive partner? Or a partner who is a drug addict? Are you really asking too much to want a partner who respects your parents AND isn't abusive??? This example may take it to the absurd extreme, but the book's basic premise doesn't work. We expect our partners to be a lot of things; picking someone who happens to meet three criteria is one way to go about it, but it is disingenuous to imagine that we should give up on everything else about a partner if we can find someone with those 3 traits. In my dating experience, I am less shopping for traits and more looking for red flags--and there are a lot of red flags to be wary of. This book was kind of useless for those problems.
Probably not. Wasn't really impressed.
This was a non-fiction book.
This book was packed full of objective information and advice, But I never felt like I was reading a textbook (other than wishing I had a paperback copy and a highlighter at the ready many times lol). The stories and case studies that are presented and seamlessly woven in with the statistics and facts.
Most of this information could be applied to relationships of a nonromantic nature as well!
I would recommend it to anyone. plain and simple. I believe that it's currently one of the best buys on Audible!
The negative sounding "settle" has such a different meaning now. Hearing the numbers on just how few people meet all of a person's ideal mate criteria was eye opening. I'm still sticking to the single life, but still very interesting listen.
Judge the book by its title. It is indeed about science. The book often reads (and sounds) like an academic paper.
However, Tashiro does a great job keeping it all interesting, and he does an even better job making the information relevant to the reader.
The narration is high quality.
I definitely recommend this book.
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