The Real Purpose of Parenting

The Book You Wish Your Parents Read

By: Dr. Phillip B Dembo

Narrated by: Dr. Phillip B Dembo

Length: 6 hrs and 47 mins

Publisher's summary

The Real Purpose of Parenting is a series of stories and life lessons from the world of a therapist, known as The Parent Coach. Very well-intentioned, well meaning parents are at the point of crisis with their kids because their own best parenting efforts are NOT producing the children they want them to be. And there, according to Dr. Phil Dembo, lies the problem.

In The Real Purpose of Parenting, even the best parents are capable of smothering the growth of their kid’s life. This can happen because the truth of who the child is, and what the child truly needs is often overlooked or ignored in the agenda that many parents lay out for their kids. Thus...often landing the family in a colossal melt down.

Dr. Dembo shows simple family “turn around” strategies that reframe the real purpose of parenting and gives each family, and child, their own salvation.

©2012 Dr. Phillip B. Dembo (P)2012 Gildan Media, LLC

Critic reviews

“If only we all could have had Dr. Phil Dembo as our father! His book reads less as a self-help manual and more like insights from a wise elder.” (Vickie Falcone, M.A., author of Buddha Never Raised Kids & Jesus Didn’t Drive Carpool: Seven Principles for Parenting With Soul)

recommend daily

Any additional comments?

As a pediatrician, I recommend this book daily to parents as overview of goals in parenting: raise a child with a conscious who can self regulate, parent to emotions and create your family culture. If you read one parenting book this is it.

helped me with my 19 year old son to think differe

Makes me look at things in a different way with my very difficult 19 year old son. I was about to disown him and instead am trying what I learned from the book. We will see if it works, but I was at the end of my rope. Thank you for the information.

Great parenting concepts, delivery could be better

Any additional comments?

Dr. Dembo outlines a great philosophy that the role of parents is to coach children. I like a lot of the concepts and philosophy that he outlines and will try to use many of the ideas. Athough we might tweak them a bit so they don't sound so academic or negative. For example , rather than having a family meeting maybe we call it the family check in. I also like his suggestions for family rituals and responding to children without emotions. I would actually be very interested in hearing more of his thoughts on responding to childens accomplishments. The book does not really spend time describing how to respond to children's accomplishments and successes, instead it focuses on how parents deal with events they find challenging.

I have to agree with others who commented that the narration was very even toned. I didn't find it as annoying as some of the other readers. After a while you get used to his slow-pace. I think it reflects how he tries to work with children and parents in stressful situations (by remaining calm at all times.) While his attempts at humor are not lol funny, I though they were endearing because you know he's genuinely trying to keep things lighthearted.

My only critique of the books content is that at times the doctor is too academic in his explanation. At times I got lost in his general explanation of the theory. I think it would be more helpful to use more examples to illustrate the concepts; as well as provide alternative responses that parents could have used instead. I assume this is intentional on the doctor's part, that he wants parents to find their own solutions. However, for me examples are the best way to learn soft skills like this that require more practice.

For instance, honoring the intentions of the child's feelings is fairly vague. A few more examples might make the desired behavior clearer. Likewise the cop and Mohawk examples he provides on responding vs reactioning were helpful. I wish he had given more examples or even compared / contrasting responses vs reaction. A side by side comparison would have helped me start to recognize the patterns.

Overall I really enjoyed the book gave it 4 out of 5 stars because I think that concepts are what matters and you can get over the sometimes academic approach.

Good advice for parents, learn to forgive the narration

Let me start off by agreeing that the author perhaps might not have been the best person to narrate his work. That being said, it wasn't distracting enough to really detract from the advice for parents. It took me a while to catch on. At first, I think it was a little difficult to get into the book. I felt like I was about halfway through before I got to the practical advice or concrete examples of how to implement his suggestions. I've certainly started paying more attention in my interactions with my child and attempting to repeat to myself that I should respond and not react. This is worth listening to for any parent

I loved the content

But it was a struggle to listen to this man read without any emotion or intonation besides what his limited nasal cavity could supply.

I’m still going to recommend people listen/read this but be wary if you’re sensitive to poor narrators.

Good advice.

Very good, solid advice from an experienced therapist. As a narrator, though, Dr. Dembo is a pretty good therapist.

Loved it

This book will change your life. It explains how parents want children to be the same as them, held up to their standards. But it's much more than that. It's a whole different way of looking at the world. It changed my world view. This book is a must read. Not only that, the author is entertaining and tells about case studies which really livens up the book. It's excellent.

Lots of good parenting info

Would you consider the audio edition of The Real Purpose of Parenting to be better than the print version?

I prefer audio for non-fiction because I have a harder time getting through them in print version. This book, however, had lots of stories woven in, so it probably would have been good both ways. There was one chapter that was a little heavy that I think was much easier to get through being on audio.

What did you like best about this story?

A great parenting book to shift the way you parent

What do you think the narrator could have done better?

I personally just didn't care for the narrator's voice. I usually am happy when the narrator is the author, but this time it made it a little hard to listen to.

Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

I could definitely see myself and my children in some of his anecdotes.

Terrific

Would you listen to The Real Purpose of Parenting again? Why?

I have and will. So I will remember

What was one of the most memorable moments of The Real Purpose of Parenting?

His parents trying to make him look like everyone else.

Which character – as performed by Dr. Phillip B Dembo – was your favorite?

Himself

Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

Yes

Any additional comments?

no

Great Information at the Right Time

I didn't know I needed to hear the words in this book when I started listening, but I quickly realized the advice was exactly what I needed.

The author gives plenty of examples of family situations, with at least one that is sure to resonate with you, as well as techniques for managing them.

I want to buy the hardcopy version to use as a reference book. I will be buying a new yellow highlighter too!