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The Disease to Please: Curing the People-Pleasing Syndrome | [Harriet Braiker]

The Disease to Please: Curing the People-Pleasing Syndrome

People pleasers are not just nice people who go overboard trying to make everyone happy. Those who suffer from the Disease to Please are people who say "Yes" when they really want to say "No". For them, the uncontrollable need for the elusive approval of others is an addiction. Their debilitating fears of anger and confrontation force them to use "niceness" and "people-pleasing" as self-defense camouflage.
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Publisher's Summary

People pleasers are not just nice people who go overboard trying to make everyone happy. Those who suffer from the Disease to Please are people who say "Yes" when they really want to say "No". For them, the uncontrollable need for the elusive approval of others is an addiction. Their debilitating fears of anger and confrontation force them to use "niceness" and "people-pleasing" as self-defense camouflage.

Featured on NBC's Today, The Disease to Please explodes the dangerous myth that "people pleasing" is a benign problem. Best-selling author and frequent Oprah guest Dr. Harriet Braiker offers clear, positive, practical, and easily do-able steps toward recovery.

Begin with a simple but revealing quiz to discover what type of people-pleaser you are. Then learn how making even small changes to any single portion of the Disease to Please Triangle, involving your thoughts, feelings, and behavior, will cause a dramatic, positive, and long-lasting change to the overall syndrome.

As a recovered people pleaser, you will finally see that a balanced way of living that takes others into consideration but puts the emphasis first on pleasing yourself and gaining your own approval is the clearest path to health and happiness.

©2001 Harriet B. Braiker, Ph.D.; (P)2004 AMI

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

4.1 (78 )
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  •  
    Christopher A Phipps 12-01-14 Member Since 2014
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Not overly religious"
    Would you consider the audio edition of The Disease to Please to be better than the print version?

    I've read the paperback version of this book and it was painful to get through. This may be, because I just don't like reading books.


    What was one of the most memorable moments of The Disease to Please?

    From the very beginning of the book, it pulls no punches. It explains that you can really screw up your life by letting others walk over you. It also tells you that you can cause relationships with others to fail because of your "give all" reactions to everything.


    Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

    While I didn't cry, the book gave me strong emotional reactions because it was like looking in a mirror. It has definitely helped me alter my life in a positive directoin.


    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Urias Silva Sao Paulo, Brazil 12-17-09
    Urias Silva Sao Paulo, Brazil 12-17-09 Member Since 2007
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    "Maybe all the people need this"

    Although this is a self help book it contains valuable and acessible information. Harriet Braiker is very very good in explaining the problem and remedies. She is not rosy, she is not tragic. Bernadette Dunne has a crystal clear pleasant voice. Maybe you think you don't need it. I dare say you are wrong.

    5 of 6 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Brooke 07-19-15
    Brooke 07-19-15 Member Since 2012
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    8
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    "Focused on sexual abuse"
    Would you say that listening to this book was time well-spent? Why or why not?

    This book is only about 4 hours long and she spend quite a lot of time on sexual abuse...which was disappointing because not all people who want to please others have that problem. And the example story she gives out is quite gruesome and disturbing, which I could not relate to at all.


    Any additional comments?

    I wish she wrote less about the sexual side of it and focused more on interpersonal skills in general so that the broad audience can relate to it. Talking about sexual abuse is fine, but that's not what the title represents. I was looking for general interpersonal skills based on guilt, insecurities, etc.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Carina 04-01-15
    Carina 04-01-15 Member Since 2015
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    "Everything I needed to learn"

    This book was very insightful. It gave me the tools and understanding of how I was sabotaging my self-esteem and many of my relationships without having the slightest clue. I recommend it for everyone who is struggling with conflict management, self-esteem and exhaustion from trying to please everyone. Great thanks to the author.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Deb Willmar, MN, United States 01-16-12
    Deb Willmar, MN, United States 01-16-12
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    "The Disease to Please"
    If you could sum up The Disease to Please in three words, what would they be?

    Excellent resource for co-dependent people.


    What other book might you compare The Disease to Please to and why?

    None


    Which character – as performed by Bernadette Dunne – was your favorite?

    None at this time


    What’s an idea from the book that you will remember?

    None at this time


    Any additional comments?

    None at this time

    1 of 4 people found this review helpful

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