Instead of being merely the receiver of the parents' psychological and spiritual legacy, children function as ushers of the parents' development. Parents unwittingly pass on an inheritance of psychological pain and emotional shallowness. To handle the behavior that results, traditional books on parenting abound with clever techniques for control and quick fixes for dysfunction.
In Dr. Shefali Tsabary's conscious approach to parenting, however, children serve as mirrors of their parents' forgotten self. Those willing to look in the mirror have an opportunity to establish a relationship with their own inner state of wholeness. Once they find their way back to their essence, parents enter into communion with their children, shifting away from the traditional parent-to-child "know it all" approach and more towards a mutual parent-with-child relationship. The pillars of the parental ego crumble as the parents awaken to the ability of their children to transport them into a state of presence.
©2010 Namaste Publishing Inc. (P)2014 Namaste Publishing Inc.
amazing book to become a better person and consequently a better parent. theory, why, and practical advises, how; nice voice and narrator (which is the writer her self).
should be thought in schools and universities.
Una abierta de ojos a la gran influencia que tenemos en el comportamiento y formacion de nuestros hijos y de donde bienen nuestras limitaciones como Papas. Algunas de las teorias que la Dra.Tsabary presenta fueron sorpresivamente refrescantes para mi. Altamente recomendable para Papas nuevos.
I loved every minute of this book. It's one I'll refer back to over the next several years as my children grow. I loved her approach of the there's-no-quick-fix-parenting out there. Good kids begin with a conscious parent.
This book has lots of great ideas and goals to achieve as a parent but no real advice regarding what to do when faced with a teenager who is directly antagonistic or recurrently challenging a boundary that must exist. I have 3 good kids but I bought this book because I want to be the best parent possible. This book wasn't a useful tool.
See above. I stopped listening about half way through the book and may have missed the more concrete material. If that's the case, it needs to be included earlier. You win a reader over by building on small successes and bringing them along.
Her accent was pleasing. Her voice sounded friendly and approachable, and consistent with her message/philosophy.
I wholeheartedly agree with the author's message. I believe strongly that I don't get to "choose" my kids, only guide and support them. This book affirmed my belief but didn't help me get there. I don't know that it would convince a more authoritarian parent of the primacy of autonomy either.
a different author and reader
disappointment and revolt, annoyed by the reader's tone of voice.
The book has proven to be a waist of my time and money. It is not only superficial, is full of empty cliches and phraseology that do not apply to the majority of parents in today western society.
There is so much Freudian crap in it, it makes your mind spin! There is so much superficially understood and badly used new age Buddha zeny varnish, that is painful to go through. Pronouncements are offered, a dime a dozen, repetitively, unrealistically, and uncritically presented, most of them based on the outdated (and never substantiated) Freudian psychic energy model.
There is an assumption the writer makes and brings in this book about the reader, that makes the tone of the book patronizing and belittling. There is so little real life advice and examples, that it makes it a waste of time and money.
Most situations presented, although offered as 'majority' are anecdotal at best. No studies are quoted, explained, or described, no other school of thought is ever mentioned and compared. The book seems to be written for overachiever parents, on the higher income strata, with unresolved and unacknowledged emotional baggage and problems, which the author assumes, they tend to bring into their own child rearing. Pleassse!
Also, there is an implied authoritarian and strict tradition functioning as an undercurrent that informs the "model parent" in this book, that is not specific to contemporary western life. Most of the parents I know today in the western world are generations away from the authoritarian cultural models she takes issue with.
She contradicts herself constantly, interprets situations with both sides of her mouth, and gives contradictory advice for similar problems.
It is the worst parenting book I ever encountered! Most of the theoretical foundation of her approach has actually been around for at least two generations now, most of it based on work done by luminaries like Mary Ainsworth, and John Bowlby, and there are many books, much better written, researched, and practical out there.
As for the 'making of the parent', she so proudly presents as her own and singular approach, remember Dr. Spock? He's been telling parents this very truth since the 40's. And remembering Dr. Spock's message, 'trust yourself as a parent, you know more than you think you know', to this book's main message fear that you parent as badly as your own parents did, is a step I am not recommending anyone take. Nobody is just the result of one's upbringing, or tradition, and children react to real life present situations, not to their parents elusive subconsciousness (whatever that may be) and so do parents. Besides, the book rarely talks about children, but more about parents, assuming them to be of one or two kinds, and badgering and nagging at them constantly.
More than a parenting book! Must read!! Loved every word in this book!! Have listened twice already and will listen again! Message is so important!
This book totally changed not only the way I look at parenting my 2 year old son, but at all of my relationships. I'm so grateful I found this when he was young. I thought I was already a conscious parent but I had lots of opportunities to change. I love that Dr. Tsabary reads the book - her voice is so soothing.
I am eternally grateful I record super soul Sunday. It is there I first heard of this book and bought it the next day. I have never read a book that I could not wait to read again before finishing my initial read. Words do no justice. This is no book it is an experience that upon completing you find you have been transformed into a capable parent without fear of doing it wrong.
Dr. Shefali has changed the trajectory of my life with this book. Reinvigorating my faith in my loving spirit as a mom and erasing old patterns of damaging, behavior, this book is my new gift to all moms. Thank you, Dr. Shefali for allowing Spirit to guide and speak through you! Suriyah
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