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Self-Compassion: Stop Beating Yourself Up and Leave Insecurity Behind | [Kristin Neff]

Self-Compassion: Stop Beating Yourself Up and Leave Insecurity Behind

The relentless pursuit of high self-esteem has become a virtual religion - and a tyrannical one at that. Our ultracompetitive culture tells us we need to be constantly above average to feel good about ourselves, but there is always someone more attractive, successful, or intelligent than we are. And even when we do manage to grab hold of high self-esteem for a brief moment, we can't seem to keep it. Our sense of self-worth goes up and down like a ping-pong ball, rising and falling in lockstep with our latest success or failure.
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Publisher's Summary

From leading psychologist Dr. Kristin Neff comes a step-by-step guide explaining how to be more self-compassionate and achieve your dreams in life.

The relentless pursuit of high self-esteem has become a virtual religion - and a tyrannical one at that. Our ultracompetitive culture tells us we need to be constantly above average to feel good about ourselves, but there is always someone more attractive, successful, or intelligent than we are. And even when we do manage to grab hold of high self-esteem for a brief moment, we can't seem to keep it. Our sense of self-worth goes up and down like a ping-pong ball, rising and falling in lockstep with our latest success or failure.

Fortunately, there is an alternative to self-esteem that many experts believe is a better and more effective path to happiness: self-compassion. The research of Dr. Kristin Neff and other leading psychologists indicates that people who are compassionate toward their failings and imperfections experience greater well-being than those who repeatedly judge themselves. The feelings of security and self-worth provided by self-compassion are also highly stable, kicking in precisely when self-esteem falls down. This book powerfully demonstrates why it's so important to be self-compassionate and give yourself the same caring support you'd give to a good friend.

This groundbreaking work will show you how to let go of debilitating self-criticism and finally learn to be kind to yourself. Using solid empirical research, personal stories, practical exercises, and humor, Dr. Neff - the world's foremost expert on self-compassion - explains how to heal destructive emotional patterns so that you can be healthier, happier, and more effective. Engaging, highly readable, and eminently accessible, this book has the power to change your life.

©2011 Kristin Neff, Ph.D. (P)2011 HarperCollinsPublishers

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

4.4 (206 )
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4.3 (173 )
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  •  
    C. Rodowsky colorado 04-20-15
    C. Rodowsky colorado 04-20-15 Member Since 2013
    HELPFUL VOTES
    7
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    15
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    "I am sure I will listen again"

    At first this book seems to be elaborating on a intuitive topic. Although once I started listening it occurred to me that most people including myself need to hear this and incorporate its message into daily life. Equipped with this tool I look forward to leading a life that is more accepting of who I am and my personal experience. I also plan to use the tool in relating to others.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Dan B. 03-29-15
    Dan B. 03-29-15 Member Since 2015
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Love, Love, Love It !"

    This is one of the best, most helpful books I've ever read. It helps you to feel not so alone, and that somebody truly understands. Not just the subject of the book, but all the feelings that go along with it. That there can be a light at the end of the tunnel. The narration is wonderful. It's all around a blessing !











    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    deborah 02-13-15
    deborah 02-13-15 Member Since 2015
    HELPFUL VOTES
    2
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    "This book has made a huge impact"

    I was skeptical about another self-help book, but everything Neff writes about self-criticism and how it can rule our lives without us even being aware of the damage we do to ourselves, makes perfect sense. Some of us just live with the suffering caused by our internal negative dialogue, and it isn't until we become aware of it, that we are able to change. It's not easy, but my change has begun.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Jocelyn 06-16-15
    Jocelyn 06-16-15

    Say something about yourself!

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    "A life changer! I shall bathe in compassion!"

    This book teaches ways to love yourself and embrace lifes difficult times in a positive healthy way.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    rpm 05-11-15
    rpm 05-11-15 Member Since 2013
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    2
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    "Worth the read"

    As one of many people who tries to be kind to everyone but myself, this book helps me focus on putting reasonable boundaries on my self expectations. Have retread it twice after some tough days.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    V. Quinn 12-27-14
    V. Quinn 12-27-14 Member Since 2013
    ratings
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    7
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    "good program"
    What did you love best about Self-Compassion?

    The program is great! I read the print book b/c I couldn't stand the reading of this book. The reader uses NO intonation which makes it very dull to listen to. But, the book, and the CD Course are great!


    Who was your favorite character and why?

    Kristin Neff is really good.


    How could the performance have been better?

    reader use more intonation so it is easier to listen to


    What insight do you think you’ll apply from Self-Compassion?

    loving-kindness and self-compassion and meditation


    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Brad San Antonio, TX, United States 02-05-13
    Brad San Antonio, TX, United States 02-05-13
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    "Amazing Book!"

    This book has really helped me a lot with my mood-disorder (minor Bi-Polar)
    Praise the Lord!

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    A. Kim Rochester, NY USA 12-11-12
    A. Kim Rochester, NY USA 12-11-12

    good_old_fashioned_smell

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    "Very Helpful"
    Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

    Yes, I thought it was very helpful. Even though I didn't do all of the exercises, simply hearing this new perspective was immensely helpful for me to be less self-critical. I believe that my overall sense of self has improved and I have less anxious episodes caused by self-judgement and doubt.


    Did the narration match the pace of the story?

    Yes, though I found the narrator's voice slightly ingratiating - she had one of those voices that sounds almost too soft and pandering, like she is trying really hard to sound gentle instead of just speaking like a normal person. I wish she had just spoken in a straightforward manner.


    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    O. Oye Houston, TX United States 12-17-13
    O. Oye Houston, TX United States 12-17-13 Listener Since 2008
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Not a good book."
    Would you try another book from Kristin Neff and/or Xe Sands?

    No


    Would you ever listen to anything by Kristin Neff again?

    No


    How did the narrator detract from the book?

    Indifferent to narrator though I think content made for a lifetime-movie reading.


    If you could play editor, what scene or scenes would you have cut from Self-Compassion?

    Everything about the author's life.


    Any additional comments?

    This really is more of a self indulgent autobiography not a book on self compassion.

    3 of 7 people found this review helpful

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