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I Need Your Love, Is That True?
- How to Stop Seeking Love, Approval, and Appreciation and Start Finding Them Instead
- Narrated by: Kimberly Farr
- Length: 6 hrs and 47 mins
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Publisher's summary
In Loving What Is, best-selling author Byron Katie introduced thousands of people to her simple and profound method of finding happiness through questioning the mind. Now, I Need Your Love, Is That True? examines a universal, age-old source of anxiety: our relationships with others. In this groundbreaking book, Katie helps you question everything you have been taught to do to gain love and approval. In doing this, you discover how to find genuine love and connection.
The usual advice offered in self-help books and reinforced by our culture advocates a stressful, all-consuming quest for love and approval. We are advised to learn self-marketing and manipulative skills: how to attract, impress, seduce, and often pretend to be something we aren't. This approach doesn't work. It leaves millions of walking wounded, those who, having failed to find love or appreciation, blame themselves and conclude that they are unworthy of love.
I Need Your Love, Is That True? helps you illuminate every area in your life where you seem to lack what you long for most; the love of your spouse, the respect of your child, a lover's tenderness, or the esteem of your boss. Through its penetrating inquiry, you will quickly discover the falseness of the accepted ways of seeking love and approval, and also of the mythology that equates love with need. Using the method in this book, you will inquire into painful beliefs that you've based your whole life on, and be delighted to see them evaporate. Katie shows you how unraveling the knots in the search for love, approval, and appreciation brings real love and puts you in charge of your own happiness.
“Everyone agrees that love is wonderful, except when it’s terrible. People spend their whole lives tantalized by love - seeking it, trying to hold on to it, or trying to get over it. Not far behind love, as major preoccupations, come approval and appreciation. From childhood on, most people spend much of their energy in a relentless pursuit of these things, trying out different methods to be noticed, to please, to impress, and to win other people’s love, thinking that’s just the way life is. This effort can become so constant and unquestioned that we barely notice it anymore.
This book takes a close look at what works and what doesn’t in the quest for love and approval. It will help you find a way to be happier in love and more effective in all your relationships. What you learn here will bring fulfillment to all kinds of relationships, including romantic love, dating, marriage, work, and friendship.” (Byron Katie)
Critic reviews
"Katie's chatty style and her use of detailed dialogues and simple exercises will make many readers feel transformation is inevitable." (Publishers Weekly)
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In You Can Heal Your Heart, self-empowerment luminary Louise Hay and renowned grief and loss expert David Kessler have come together to start a conversation on healing after loss. Louise and David discuss the emotions and thoughts that occur when a relationship leaves you brokenhearted, a marriage ends in divorce, or a loved one dies.
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Good Information, Poor Narration.
- By Ryan Healey on 04-20-14
By: David Kessler, and others
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When Your Best Isn't Good Enough
- By: Kevin Leman
- Narrated by: Chris Fabry
- Length: 7 hrs
- Unabridged
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Some people feel they don't measure up to anyone's expectations. As a result, they tend to procrastinate, set unrealistic goals, or continually try to please others. With the positive, no-nonsense strategies offered in When Your Best Isn't Good Enough, listeners can raise their low self-perception and overcome these feelings of rejection and inadequacy.
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Therapy
- By E.M.Knight on 03-25-19
By: Kevin Leman
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Daily Wisdom for Why Does He Do That?
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- Narrated by: Gary Galone
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Like a constant friend, this collection of meditations is a source of strength and reassurance designed to speak to women like you, women in relationships with angry and controlling men. It helps you to digest what is happening a piece at a time, so you can gain clarity, safety, and freedom.
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Just what I needed.
- By lori Goodson on 11-07-15
By: Lundy Bancroft
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Turn Your Mate into Your Soulmate
- A Practical Guide to Happily Ever After
- By: Arielle Ford
- Narrated by: Karen White
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Internationally best-selling author and relationship expert Arielle Ford offers the keys to rediscovering love, passion, respect, and renewed commitment years after the simple act of falling in love and getting married. It's one thing to fall in love and get married. It is quite another thing to have a marriage you love. This is the true purpose of Turn Your Mate into Your Soulmate.
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SO Hard To Listen To!
- By froglover on 12-03-16
By: Arielle Ford
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10 Conversations You Need to Have with Yourself
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Some of the most effective talk therapy is self-talk therapy - learning to connect positively with that internal voice that serves as your own personal GPS to guide you through life. Rabbi Shmuley teaches the reader to reconnect with the inner voice of conscience, the source of personal dreams and values, which has been so drowned out by the noise of a culture that emphasizes form over substance, career over calling, and consumption over conviction. Drawing on Rabbi Shmuley's extensive counseling experience, this book helps you defeat negative self-talk.
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Grateful for inspiration, guidance and humility
- By Mike on 07-27-15
By: Shmuley Boteach
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We Love Each Other, But . . .
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We Love Each Other, But... offers simple, practical tips that will help you restore and strengthen a relationship that has gone off track. It lays out the nuts and bolts of building relationships so they continue to be gratifying over the long haul. Dr. Ellen Wachtel shows how, even when you feel like giving up on a relationship or marriage, you can recapture why you fell in love in the first place. Dr. Wachtel promises that there is more and suggests simple ways to keep vitality in relationships.
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Some interesting material
- By Scott on 10-25-12
By: Ellen Wachtel
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Finding Your Own North Star
- Claiming the Life You Were Meant to Live
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As the creator of Life Designs, Inc., Martha Beck has helped hundreds of clients find their own North Stars and figure out how to fulfill their potential and create joyful lives through her lectures, seminars, and one-on-one counseling. In this book she shares her step-by-step program that will guide you to fulfill your own potential.
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Narration not for me
- By MARYANN ORDONEZ on 10-02-17
By: Martha Beck
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Make Miracles in Forty Days
- Turning What You Have into What You Want
- By: Melody Beattie
- Narrated by: Melody Beattie
- Length: 4 hrs and 8 mins
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Melody Beattie has been a trusted counselor for millions of people for more than 25 years. Her books are infinitely relatable, flush with candor and insights, and rooted in firsthand experience. Make Miracles in Forty Days is punctuated with Beattie's own stirring stories of overcoming obstacles and dealing with life's tragedies.
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"An Amazing Book"
- By Liz on 03-19-11
By: Melody Beattie
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The Dark Side of the Light Chasers
- By: Debbie Ford
- Narrated by: Debbie Ford
- Length: 8 hrs and 6 mins
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Debbie Ford explains that the dark side of our personality should not be hidden. By denying our dark side, we reject aspects of our true natures rather than giving ourselves the freedom to live authentically. Here she shows that it is possible to acknowledge and accept our so-called weaknesses, proving that these qualities may be hidden strengths. Full of illuminating stories and practical exercises, Debbie Ford shows us how to reconcile our darker impulses and find the gifts they offer.
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Great book and I would combine it with others
- By Jes_074 on 05-01-17
By: Debbie Ford
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What If This Is Heaven?
- How Our Cultural Myths Prevent Us from Experiencing Heaven on Earth
- By: Anita Moorjani
- Narrated by: Anita Moorjani
- Length: 6 hrs and 52 mins
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Following her near-death experience as shared in the New York Times best-seller Dying to Be Me, Anita Moorjani knows well the truths that exist beyond common knowledge and acceptance. The clarity she has gained has led her to further understand who she was born to be. Part of that truth has involved contemplating the cultural myths infused into our everyday lives. Passed down from generation to generation, these myths are pervasive and influential.
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Excellent Follow-up to Dying to Be Me
- By Gillian Culff on 06-19-19
By: Anita Moorjani
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What listeners say about I Need Your Love, Is That True?
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall
- Ms Emma Gavin
- 07-05-11
Audio Vs. CD
I didn't like this book in audio as I felt the narrator Kimberly Farr was very mundane to listen to after listing to the audio book 'Loving What Is' by Byron Katie which was amazing. However, having now also listened to the CD version of this same book 'I Need Your Love, Is That True?' narrated by Byron Katie herself, it was far more interesting and I would urge anyone seriously considering purchasing this book to purchase in it in the CD form instead. Kimvberly Farr lacks that passion and insight that Byron Katie oozes from the same material.
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17 people found this helpful
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- Deb Dake
- 10-13-11
As always the material is EXCELLENT and yet...
Byron Katie has a unique style in her way of communicating and I grew very accustomed to it from other speeches and books. That fact made listening to this narrator a trial. I am not yet finished with the book and every single time I turn it on I cringe. I try to relax by focusing on the material, trying to mentally overlay any other remembered voice but the narrator's intonations and vocal interpretation. Ms. Farr's expressions while reading feel incongruous at times and like bad mimicry at others. It's like a lot of typos on the page - you can understand what the writer is saying but the typos slow you down, you keep trying to read anyway because you want the material.
Byron Katie is a blessing on the planet and the queen of personal accountability. I recommend any of her books and speeches.
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13 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Terry Tuznik
- 04-07-05
Life changing
This book is life changing. I never thought a book could be so powerful yet after the first day of listening I felt the changes starting. I went out and bought copies for all my non-audible listner friends.
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12 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Amy
- 06-05-07
WOW
This book, even if you do what she calls 'the work' on only a few thoughts, it will dramatically change how you see things. I was very impressed at how the book was read, and how easy it is to understand and learn the tools that she teaches. And with personal work, the tools that the author gives you WILL create a whole new way of looking at things. Since I have used them I am happier, more peaceful and I have much more patience.
While there are a few things in this book that I do not agree with, I did enjoy the book and am looking forward to continue to use the tools on negative thought patterns. Also, the worksheets that she speaks about can be downloaded at www.thework.com.
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10 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Deb
- 06-07-06
Best Book I've read-changed my life
The book is a powerful guide for changing your life. Her teachings are simply stated and in harmony with past great teachers. Katie is an average American lady who finds the truth and is capable of presenting a path for other average people to follow if they chose. I believe my life has improved immensely from following the simple but profound teachings presented in this book.
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10 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Deepti
- 04-30-05
Life Changing Book, Beautifully Narrated.
If you've heard the words "love yourself" but have wondered how one goes about doing that REALLY, try reading this book AND doing the exercises. Once all the rubbish got swept away( in 2 weeks of intense work,) all the silly assumptions that made me feel unsure and sad, all that has remained is a love and respect for myself and for my husband. Everyone is better for it. Thank you Katie!
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9 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Barbara
- 06-17-05
Waking up to Love
Katie's book speaks to the true nature of people who want to love, crave love, seek it out and yet find it elusive and painful. In her amazing wisdom she provides tools for us to go inside our own minds and find out what is true for us and unravel the pain we think we are in. It was extremely supportive esp. when I was dealing with my own personal pain in relationships. If you have never heard a true teacher, let this be your first. You won't be disappointed
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8 people found this helpful
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- Jane
- 12-19-12
3 ½ stars. Some good ideas.
Some are common sense but good reminders. The difference between self-help books and therapy is that self-help books can raise your consciousness, but they do not apply specifically to you, your situation, and your history - the way therapy would.
MAIN IDEAS IN THIS BOOK.
1. Everyone wants approval and appreciation from others - even strangers. Everyone wants to be loved.
Example: a guy brings a magazine to a doctor’s office. He sets it on the table in the waiting room. When he leaves he picks it up to take with him but he tells the other patients “I brought this with me when I came.” He doesn’t want strangers to think bad of him.
When others are talking and you want to interrupt, it’s because you want to say something to impress them. You want them to think you are smart or attractive or funny or other. But the bottom line is they rarely give you the appreciation you crave. You must give that to yourself. Don’t expect others to pat you on the back and be impressed. Your greatest happiness is from your internal feelings, not from being loved or approved by others. You need to be honest with yourself. Do things that make you proud of yourself and happy with yourself. Don’t do things you don’t want to do. Be comfortable saying no.
2. In relationships, especially with your spouse, be honest. A happy marriage is when she can say I want you to enjoy going to the races without me. I will attend my poetry event. We can meet for dinner later. The goal is to love your spouse and truly want their happiness and not require them to do things they don’t want to do.
3. When your spouse criticizes you, agree with it. Say I hear you. You could be right.
4. Your own fears are due to erroneous thoughts. The author has a set of questions to help you see the truth. These questions are to be used whenever a thought causes you fear, hopelessness, or frustration.
Examples: You waved at a man and he did not wave back. You fear he thinks something negative about you. But maybe he wasn’t wearing his glasses and did not see you. Your husband doesn’t say hello when you walk into the room. You fear he doesn’t love you anymore. Maybe he loves you but was really engrossed in the newspaper.
The author’s questions are the following:
Is it true?
Can I absolutely know that it’s true?
How do I react when I believe that thought?
How do I treat others and myself when I believe that thought?
Who would I be without that thought?
Then, turn around the thought and find three ways in which the opposite is truer or as true as your original statement. For example.
Original statement: He doesn’t like me.
The turn around statement: He does like me.
Three ways the turn around is true: He did not see me because he wasn’t wearing his glasses. He did a favor for me yesterday. He said something nice to me recently.
MY OPINIONS:
Item 1.
I’M DOING SOMETHING DIFFERENT AS A RESULT OF READING THIS BOOK --- HOW I TREAT OTHERS:
I’m smiling more at others. I’m trying to give approval and appreciation to others. When in doubt I’m quieter, asking questions, and listening more. The point of the book is I should do things that have me appreciating myself. I like that idea because it gives me comfort and justification for being selfish and for doing things that I want to do. But at the moment, the reverse thought of how I treat others is more valuable to me.
Item 1 - another thought. I know one person who does not care what strangers would think if he took a magazine, but he does care about what potential customers think of him. So it’s not exactly everyone in every situation.
Item 3. I don’t think this should be done if one has a verbally abusive spouse. When an abuser criticizes and insults, the recipient needs to refuse to accept it, stand up to it, and fight back (verbally).
Item 4. People who are clinically depressed probably need more help than what is proposed in item 4.
The author’s use of sweetheart and honey to people asking questions was distracting and felt uncomfortable. These words put the author in a Parent role and the rest of us in the Child role.
The narrator Kimberly Farr was excellent.
Genre: self-help psychology.
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7 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Maple Counseling Center
- 01-14-08
Very eye opening
Byron Katie takes her work deeper in this book than ever before. I had to listen to it a couple of times to truly comphrend what she was talking about. At first "weird and foreign", now eye opening and compelling! Understanding Katies material sets the listener free in their minds and in their lives.
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4 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Leigh
- 01-20-06
Very Helpful
I enjoyed hearing more about "the work" which I was introduced to in "Loving What Is". I didn't like it quite as much as the "Loving What Is". It does not have actual sessions with Katie like Loving What is does which makes a big difference. None the less, if you are interested in "The Work" it is still a good resource.
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4 people found this helpful