Deal Breakers

When to Work on a Relationship and When to Walk Away

By: Dr. Bethany Marshall

Narrated by: Renée Raudman

Length: 5 hrs and 16 mins

Publisher's summary

This is a book about men. Not all men, just emotionally unhealthy men. The ones who make you ask, "Is it him or is it me? Am I making too big a deal out of this? I try to tell him how I feel, but he says I'm overreacting or needy or it's all my fault". Relationships are hard work, but how hard should they be? When do you know you are struggling too hard to make a relationship succeed?

Deal Breakers is about getting out of this "relationship purgatory": where the present is unfulfilling and the future is the only thing you can hope for. But there is no magic future. If he won't work on problems today, it's unlikely they'll ever be resolved. And passively hoping for change will only cost you years of depression or expensive therapy.

Dr. Bethany Marshall is here to remind women that relationships, like business relationships, are deals. In the business world, a deal breaker is the one non-negotiable term that, if not agreed to, means the deal is off. But in the world of relationships, identifying your deal breaker can be much more promising, as it holds out the possibility of helping you to understand where the relationship has gone wrong, what needs to be done in order to make it better, and when to walk away because you're doing more work than him to fix it.

©2007 Dr. Bethany Marshall (P)2007 Tantor Media Inc.

Every Woman...This is a MUST Read!!!! (listen)

Where does Deal Breakers rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

I enjoyed this audio book very much. The narrator has a nice voice.

What was one of the most memorable moments of Deal Breakers?

I learned more about unhealthy men listening to this audio book than I could ever imagine.

Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

I was able to relate and learn. This audio book helped me take a step back and take a different point of view of the my slowly ending relationship and FINALLY understand what is going on.

Any additional comments?

I think I want to purchase this book and give it to every woman that I know!!!!

I listened then bought the Kindle version

Would you consider the audio edition of Deal Breakers to be better than the print version?

I am an avid listener and have been so since the days of Books-on-Tape. This is the first book that I have listened to then immediately downloaded the Kindle version so that I could go back and reference some of the parts that I wanted to study more closely. I did enjoy the interview with the author after the book so that is a bonus over the print version.

What did you like best about this story?

I am in the throes of a breakup now and found this helpful. I downloaded the print so that now I can have a copy to look at once I start dating again. I think this book would be helpful to anyone dating or even thinking about dating.

Excellent Book For Relationships

Would you listen to Deal Breakers again? Why?

Yes, I need to refresh every now and again about relationships status'

What did you like best about this story?

It helped me to identify the situation I was in and make the decision to face the fact that my boyfriend was NOT the one for me.....

Fantastic!

I wish I had this book years ago. I recognized relationships from the past that were mistakes and now I know why. I also know how to avoid them and recognize them if I run into that type again.

A must read if having doubts!!!

What made the experience of listening to Deal Breakers the most enjoyable?

This book is a must read that I wish I had sooner. It is a real eye opener to intimate relationships of will this work or not. I have been having problems in my marriage and have been deciding for years whether I should stay or not. Deal breakers put the concerns and issues I have about my husband into perspective of what is workable and what isn't. I found through this book if its a personality trait problem the situation most likely won't change. This book has changed how I see my relationship. It showed me how a partner is suppose to be part of a relationship. I have for years been working harder at my marriage than my husband and this book has made it clear, a relationship should not be one person doing most of the work. Deal breakers describes relationship problems in a different most helpful way. I have listened to this book three times already and recommend it to friends, family, and co-workers. Please read the book if you are having relationship problems, you will be surprised!

Great For Repeat Listening and a Keeper!

I loved this book and will keep it in my Library. I highly recommend it for trying to figure out who that guy is that you love but don't understand. Excellent one to repeat from time to time. Although it is about understanding Five main personality traits of Men, it can also include women in the categories. The Author offers insight into that personality and helps you understand when it's worth staying in the relationship and when it's time to end it. I might have ended my relationship sooner if I had read this book earlier.

If you already know it's no go

I found this book too general and metaphoric to be helpful. Many of the stories offered as examples seem overly obvious. And the tone of the reading sounds too informal to build trust or confidence. It is also targeted specifically to women. And it seems to be aimed at those who are looking for a justification to leave their relationship. I only made it through a couple of chapters before I stopped. I will be returning this book. I would recommend "Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay" as a more helpful book if you are ambivalent about your relationship and need help deciding.

Great Eye-Opener!

I found this book to be very helpful and insightful. It is a must-read for anyone, male or female, straddling the fence trying to decide to whether to stay or leave a relationship. The book is written more for a female audience but if the "he's" are replaced with "she's" the book can work for a male audience as well. I did not find that the book was male bashing at all as some readers have suggested.

A must have

I thoroughly enjoyed this book and highly recommend it! And I don't recommend just any book. If you are wondering if the man in your life is someone you can work a deal with or not this book will help. It puts things in perspective and not only points out flaws with certain men it also asks you to look at yourself plus she gives incredible examples!!

Read If You're Confused & Want To Change That

You're with someone who isn't good for you and you keep giving them chances, but they never really improve your relationship or return to being that great person you fell in love with. Your day-to-day or long term relationship looks bleak and you don't know what to do. You do know what to do, but you're scared and 2nd guessing that decision for some reason. If you want help analyzing your decisions to break up & stay with this person and need help going from optimist to realist or even pessimist (because then you'd be living life by the rules not the exceptions and giving bozo the chance to prove you wrong) this book will allow you the chance to do that.

Better than friends and family, this book will allow you ALL THE TIME you need to comb through the details of your messy relationship and it will reinforce your self-confidence and intuition which you certainly need at the moment you're considering reading this book.

It was a not a male bashing book at all as some other reviews have stated. And I'm a girl's girl so I know what male bashing looks like. This book just gives you reassurance that No, It's Not You and details the 5 types of deal breakers. If this were a male bashing book, it would go on to say "and even if it is you, screw him because he's not good enough for you". I got through the 5 types of problematic men, realized my guy was most if not all of them, fell asleep through the rest of the book and woke up knowing my decision to break up with him was the best thing for both of us. And if I needed more time to mull over my decision, I could always replay the book.

The best parts are the "how bad is it?" levels that the author gives you. Just in case you're still thinking about working on it. She tells you the cases where you should work on it and other cases where it's difficult to see this person changing and you should probably get out of dodge. So if he calls back promising to change, you already know if he's a moderate or severe problem.

This book will help you get through the pain and confusion and identify the things that are so hard to see because you're using your heart more than your head.