Was your mother too busy, too tired, or too checked out to provide you with the nurturing you needed as a child? Men and women who were "undermothered" as children often struggle with intimate relationships, in part because of their unmet need for maternal care.
The Emotionally Absent Mother will help you understand what was missing from your childhood, how this relates to your mother's own history, and how you can fill the "mother gap" by:
Psychotherapist Jasmin Lee Cori traces perceived personal "defects" back to mothering deficits, relieving self-blame. And by teaching today's undermothered adults to cultivate the mothering they missed, she helps them secure happier futures - for themselves and their children.
©2010 Jasmin Lee Cori (P)2015 Tantor
"This book is a revelation to those of us whose mothering was short of what we needed." (Connie Dawson, PhD, coauthor of Growing Up Again: Parenting Ourselves, Parenting Our Children)
I have been in and out of therapy for 25 years and have never come across such a powerful self help resource as this book. It is clear, concise, and every word has impact. I cannot express my gratitude for how this book is helping me understand my mother, myself, my relationships, and my fellow human beings. Thank you Jasmin Lee Cori for helping the under mothered of this world.
Not coming from an overt abusive mother I couldn't pin point why I feel so distant & hurt at times in my relationship w/ her. But The author here gives specific behaviors of how mothers & daughters 'connect' or don't and how the 'psychological patterns' of the mother effect the connectedness to the Dtr. The focus is on the Dtrs healing which Provides hope. The so thot discusses 10 characteristics of a 'good mother' and encourages reflection to whether you got that or not. Not leaving you hanging if you didn't get that good love from your mother, she goes on to encourage healing. She provides specific things, that as an adult, U can put into action- which I have found effective. Although not having a good mother, is no place anyone wants to find themselves…the book to me was informative and helpful.
If you were under mothered, it will give you ideas on how to improve your view of life and practice exercises to get a new life.
Didn't like the narrator though. Felt like she was going to "faint on me."
First couple of sentences were a bit "abrasive" to my ears, but then it got better.
helped me heal
I liked that this is not a blame game for mothers. It's about making us understand why mothers did what they did. That helped me so much to see my mother differently and it helped me to stop blaming her, she was a victim of life circumstances herself. This book is amazing. In just these hours it took me to listen to it I made more progress than in 40 years of my life.
no, but it opened my heart
I think this book replaces lifetime of therapy
This book really has help to relieve the sense of guilt I'd been feeling at not being able to get along with my now needy recently widowed mother.
I finally understand the mechanics of our relationship and I'm able to be more relaxed about it being just what it is and knowing it's not my fault I'm not a bad daughter!
This is a book I wish many people could read to grasp their story.
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