Is there a science to love? In this groundbreaking audiobook, psychiatrist and neuroscientist Amir Levine and psychologist Rachel S. F. Heller reveal how an understanding of attachment theory - the most advanced relationship science in existence today - can help us find and sustain love.
Attachment theory forms the basis for many best-selling books on the parent/child relationship, but there has yet to be an accessible guide to what this fascinating science has to tell us about adult romantic relationships - until now. Attachment theory owes its inception to British psychologist and psychoanalyst John Bowlby, who in the 1950s examined the tremendous impact that our early relationships with our parents or caregivers has on the people we become. Also central to attachment theory is the discovery that our need to be in a close relationship with one or more individuals is embedded in our genes.
In Attached, Levine and Heller trace how these evolutionary influences continue to shape who we are in our relationships today. According to attachment theory, every person behaves in relationships in one of three distinct ways: "anxious" people are often preoccupied with their relationships and tend to worry about their partner's ability to love them back. "Avoidant" people equate intimacy with a loss of independence and constantly try to minimize closeness. "Secure" people feel comfortable with intimacy and are usually warm and loving. Attached guides listeners in determining what attachment style they and their mate (or potential mates) follow. It also offers a wealth of advice on how to navigate relationships more wisely, given a listener's attachment style and that of his or her partner. An insightful look at the science behind love, Attached offers a road map for building stronger, more fulfilling connections.
©2010 Amir Levine, M.D., Rachel Heller, M.A. (P)2010 Gildan Media Corp
Physician in Healthcare IT. Commuter. Listen to a lot of books. Recently introduced to Audible. I am hooked.
His voice is a bit boring. Message was good.
We can all learn something from this insight.
I know I did.
One thing I disliked about this audiobook was the focus on anxious attachment. I have avoidant attachment and would've preferred more suggestions toward a secure relationship. Overall this book provides a great understanding of what adult attachment is and insecure patterns people in relationships have. Very helpful in creating a positive secure relationship.
As an attachment based psychoanalytic psychotherapist, trained in London at the Bowlby Centre, I was intrigued about this book. I listened to it all the way through with a few short breaks and found it fascinating. Many people will find this clear and compelling account of how attachment styles manifest themselves and interact, very useful indeed for understanding themselves and relating to others. Beautifully read, though I'd like to hear more female readers for the science books! Well worth every penny or cent!
This book is educational in a way that should be part of our foundational education as humans. I appreciate the structure for effective communication immensely. Communication in a relationship is a skill that is so basic that we often assume that it is inherent. It is not.
Many thanks to the authors for their incite.
So much good stuff in here! After following many wrong paths to love, this book taught me how to understand myself and other people in compassionate and healthful ways. Highly recommended!
Say something about yourself!
I enjoyed listening to the book and thought the narrator was wonderful. The theory makes sense, and I can see ways to apply it in my own life.
However, about 2 hours into the book I had totally gotten the point they were trying to make. The theory was well explained at the beginning of the book, so toward the end I was tired of listening instead of hoping that there would be more. Also, there was a good chunk of the book dedicated to quizzes and questionnaires that are just not something you can do while driving.
This book is for everyone. No matter who you are, where you're from, its a must read and you will wish you had this book in your life sooner. Even if you are secure, it will help you understand the people around you who aren't. It's not just dating advice based on opinion, it's all fact and well researched, you will be amazed. Every story example, I could think of another couple in which it sounded just like them. One sounded just like me and my ex. He was anxious and I, a woman, am avoidant. I'm not gonna lie, this book made me cry a little. It's a lot to think about and if you're not secure, you will suddenly have answers for why you act the way you do and won't feel so alone in your issues. Although it reads from a scientific point of view, its still an easy read as it gives you lots of examples and scenarios you can relate to. I will continue to read this over and over throughout my life to sort of try to brainwash myself into being secure. It will help you and give you hope to becoming a secure.
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