Confessions of a D-List Supervillain

By: Jim Bernheimer

Narrated by: Jeffrey Kafer, Talmadge Ragan

Length: 5 hrs and 46 mins

Publisher's summary

Exploding from the pages of Horror, Humor, and Heroes, Volume One - it’s the full length adventures of the one and only Mechani-Cal! So grab your battlesuit and prepare to get a little nasty.

"Being a supervillain means never having to say you’re sorry - unless it’s to the judge or the parole board. Even then, you don’t really have to. It’s not like it’s going to change the outcome or anything." Those are the words of Calvin Matthew Stringel, better known as Mechani-Cal. He’s a down-on-his-luck armored villain. Follow his exploits as he gets swept up in a world domination scheme gone wrong and ends up working for these weak willed, mercy loving heroes. Immerse yourself in epic battles and see what it’s like to be an outsider looking in at a world that few have ever experienced. Climb into Cal’s battlesuit and join him on his journey. Will he avoid selling out his principles for a paycheck and a pardon? Can he resist the camaraderie of being on a super team? Does he fall prey to the ample charms of the beautiful Olympian Aphrodite? How will he survive the jealous schemes of Ultraweapon, who wears armor so powerful it makes Cal’s look like a museum piece?

See the world of “righteous do-gooders” through the eyes of someone who doesn’t particularly care for them. Revel in his sarcasm and hang on for one wild ride! Just remember: losing an argument with a group of rioters isn’t a good excuse to start lobbing tear gas indiscriminately at them. You’ve only got so many rounds and it’s going to be a long day, so make sure you get as many as possible with each one.

©2011 Jim Bernheimer (P)2011 Jeffrey Kafer

A bottom-of-the-barrel villain levels up

Calvin Stringel, aka "Mechani-Cal," is, as the title of his autobiography indicates, a D-list supervillain. He's that guy you barely remember who took up about 4 pages in issue #277 six years ago. Spider-Man beat him up once, and maybe he was part of a gang that got flattened by the Avengers during an ill-conceived plan to raid Fort Knox.

Mechani-Cal is basically, as he is repeatedly reminded, a cheap knockoff of Ultraweapon, who is this universe's Iron Man. As the story starts, however, the villainous Overlord has unleashed a plague of mind-controlling insects that have taken over most of the planet. Mechani-Cal, by staying in his armor for the last few weeks, is one of the few free-willed humans left on Earth. When he runs into the Olympians — the most powerful superhero team on Earth, and all mind-controlled — he manages to free Aphrodite from her mental enslavement. They head back to his secret underground base, which is basically a rathole in a junkyard.

The plot thenceforth flows in heroic fashion as Mechani-Cal ends up literally helping save the world, and thus "reformed," tries to earn a pardon for all past crimes by joining the good guys. Of course, none of them trust him, and Calvin is, while not truly evil, certainly not a hero. And he's now dating Aphrodite. Who used to be dating Ultraweapon. Ultraweapon doesn't take this very well.

Mechani-Cal is actually a "realistic" character given the givens of a superhero universe. The explanation for how an engineering genius has wound up being a low-rent villain mostly known for getting pounded by any hero he has the misfortune to fight makes sense, and Cal's struggle to redeem himself, without really feeling like he needs redemption, makes him a character you root for even if he is still kind of a jerk. It helps that it turns out that some of the heroes are even bigger jerks.

Cal levels up in a big way over the course of the book. He also gets to bang two of the most beautiful and powerful superheroines in the world, despite being a nerdy, unattractive ex-villain. A wish-fulfillment fantasy? Oh yeah. But he never really stops being a dork who screws up more often than he succeeds. And yet, he's very human and endearing in a fallible way. He continually does all the right things, not necessarily for the right reasons.

I enjoyed this book quite a lot. It was like a good miniseries based on some obscure mainstream comics character that a writer took a shine to, except of course these are all characters who exist only in this book.

Eh.

Well, the story was OK. Nothing special. Given the name, the story is predictable. The narrator I can do without.

Tons of story packed into a small book!

I admit, I was skeptical that a book this short would really amount to much. Turns out, I was DEAD wrong. This book had everything a great story should have, and then some! Seriously an outstanding book! The reading was well-done, and overall I loved listening to this during my drives. Can't wait for the next one!

Mindless fun

Shallow, fast-paced and entertaining.

I'm not used to the accent, so for the first chapter or so I thought the protagonist was a super-villain named Mechanicow, and pictured him in bipedal cow-themed armor with razor horns and stuff. Which was amusing in a wtf kind of way :)

Cal was quite likeable, but this book seems like a bit of wish-fulfillment for those lads in high school who were considered nerdy - man meets woman, man and woman forced into extended period of interaction (he basically locks her in a dungeon) which forces woman to see man as he truly is, she of course falls for him, etc. etc. So I didn't find the main female character to be particularly believable, but there were some others (Wendy for instance) who were interesting.

If you're willing to go along for the ride and don't think about it too closely, it's a very entertaining listen.

Saving the world, one sarcastic remark at a time!

When it comes to this title, I was pleasantly surprised at the idea of a villain actually saving the world. In most cases like this, villains would be most likely to turn on the world or revert back to the dark side after everything was said and done. Overall, I think that this was a really good concept, but I was not a fan of the ending all that much, it was somewhat not expected and didn't flow like the rest of the book.

Pleasantly surprised!!!

I'm into realistic superheroes and seen this story recently on sale.

I asked my brother told me about this story and told him that it seemed interesting and liked the sample.
He just finished listening to to the book and was very happy with the writing.

I really liked the maturity of the character development. Mature and realistic. The mainstream heroes is what I also share in perception ranging from patriotic to outright self righteousness.

Bravo to Mr. Bernhiemer.

I will be looking for the next book!

great humorous sci-fi!

if you like sci-fi and enjoy a bit of sarcastic wit then this is a good book for you. I'll definitely read more from this author

Great book, almost as good as the prequel

I listened the the most awesome prequel book first, and bought this before I was 1/2 way through the first book I liked it so much.

Performance 4 of 5
This performance was quite good, but the prequel was a 5 of 5. The reader really embodies the main characters sarcasm and humor!

Story 5 of 5
I absolutely love the storyline. Once you realize the world this story is set in is a superhero enabled future, then the story flows wonderfully.

Overall 4of 5
I would recommend this series to any scifi fans.

biz fan

Just a great / fun story. I've read it maybe 4 times and when I saw it on audible I had to buy it.

Not bad

I enjoyed this geek! It was dry, but it had enough to keep me listening.