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You Suck  By  cover art

You Suck

By: Christopher Moore
Narrated by: Susan Bennett
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Publisher's summary

"You bitch, you killed me. You suck!"

Being dead sucks. Make that being undead sucks.

Literally. Just ask Thomas C. Flood. Waking up after a fantastic night unlike anything he's ever experienced, he discovers that his girlfriend, Jody, the woman of his dreams, is a vampire. And surprise! Now he's one, too.

For some couples, the whole biting-and-blood thing would have been a deal breaker. But Tommy and Jody are in love, and they vow to work through their issues. Like how much Jody should teach Tommy about his new superpowers (and how much he needs to learn on his own). Plus there's Tommy's cute new minion, 16-year-old goth girl Abby Normal. (Well, someone has to run errands during daylight hours!)

Making the relationship work, however, is the least of Jody and Tommy's problems. Word has it that the vampire who nibbled on Jody wasn't supposed to be recruiting any new members into the club. Even worse, Tommy's erstwhile turkey-bowling pals are out to get him, at the urging of a blue-dyed Las Vegas call-girl named (duh) Blue.

And that really sucks.

Love in vein: listen to more vampire fiction.
©2007 Christopher Moore (P)2007 HarperCollins Publishers

Critic reviews

"A cheerfully perverse, gut-busting tale of young vampires in love....Moore writes with the jittery energy of a brilliant, charming class clown, mixing sex and gore and a potty mouth with a goofy-sweet sensibility to deliver laughs on nearly every page." (Publishers Weekly)

Featured Article: The 25 Best Vampire Audiobooks to Suck You In


Vampire stories have fascinated people across cultures for generations. From gothic Transylvania to early-aughts Washington, it seems like vampires have taken every form in every culture and every country around the world. From all of these options, we’ve selected 25 of the best audiobooks from the pack—those with the most captivating characters, creepiest settings, and, perhaps most importantly, the best vocal performances available.

What listeners say about You Suck

Average customer ratings
Overall
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    1,730
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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars

The narrator is fantastic!

I like C. Moore and all, but I am REALLY liking these books because Susan Bennett did such an amazing job. I never thought I would find another reader I liked as much as I liked Jim Dale (who read all the Harry Potter books). I think I will be getting all the other books she read aloud just because ...

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Christopher Moore is my new favourite author!

From the comically twisted mind of Christopher Moore has come some very funny and imaginative stories and likable characters, and this book is no exception! I am in love with the goth poser turned minion, Abbie Normal! She is a delightfully funny shallow yet deep, larger than life presence that brilliantly represents the fantasy-driven callousness, angst and vulnerability of the digital age teenager. Well-written, funny and engaging story! More, please, Mr Moore!

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Hilarious AND amazing listen!

I mentioned it, in my review of "Bloodsucking Fiends', the first in this trilogy of books, but this... and the follow-up, Bite Me... are the best audiobook performances I gave ever heard. Hands down. Susan Bennett's ability to give each character such unique personalities is unparalleled. Especially, when it comes to Abbie Normal. Laugh. Out. Loud. Funny.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Susan Bennett is a treasure

As much as I love this book, I listen to You Suck and Bite Me over and over just because Susan Bennett is hilarious as the narrator. She has a broad range of character voices, and makes the books come alive. My favorite voice in these books is Abby Normal. Cracks me up.

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars

This book almost got me fired--lol

This is a great book, great reading, and literally laugh out loud funny. I generally listen to Audio books while working, I have a multi-track mind so they help me focus.
Serveral parts of this book made me laugh out loud as my boss passed by

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9 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Yay ABBY!!!

Any additional comments?

Let's face it – Abby Normal is the real hero of this book (and series). She just rocks, and the wonderful language Moore has endowed her with is absolutely double-over hysterical.

If you're looking for a mindlessly fun romp through an authentic San Francisco, this series if totally for you. But be sure to start at the beginning – Bloodsucking Fiends! You won't be sorry.

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars

Hilarious

Christopher Moore isn't for everyone. Incredibly irreverent, profane, offbeat. But this is the fourth book of his I've read or listened to and I liked it the best. Part of that is due to the narrator, Susan Bennett, who absolutely does the best narration I've heard on any book. When she starts reading Moore's character "Abbie Normal," th book takes off. I loved it.

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Twice as funny as first one

Brilliant mesh up of story and narrator, with even funnier storyline and new characters.

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars

Narrator

It was hard to tell which character was talking. The narrator use practically the same tone and pitch with all the characters.

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars

Very funny

This is my first Christopjer Moore book... and I am glad I listen to it. It is very funny, especially in the beginning part. The author captured the behaviour of the characters perfectly ... from the barely adult vamp to the teenage goth girl vampire wannabe.
The only mark off was the story ran out of its edginess humour towards the end.

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