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The Riptide Ultra-Glide: A Novel | [Tim Dorsey]

The Riptide Ultra-Glide: A Novel

Freshly laid-off Wisconsinites Patrick and Barbara McDougall are going to sunny Florida for a modest romantic vacation. But the motel they picked isn't quite a pastel paradise, and they have to be midwesterners and make the best of a bad situation. Except bad goes to worse, and a string of misfortunes renders them unable to leave the state. Meanwhile, the next Mexican-American War is being fought, this time in Fort Lauderdale, between the Kentucky mafia and the Oxy cartel over control of the lucrative pain clinic market.
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Publisher's Summary

Welcome to Paradise!

Freshly laid-off Wisconsinites Patrick and Barbara McDougall are going to sunny Florida for a modest romantic vacation. But the motel they picked isn't quite a pastel paradise, and they have to be midwesterners and make the best of a bad situation. Except bad goes to worse, and a string of misfortunes renders them unable to leave the state.

Meanwhile, the next Mexican-American War is being fought, this time in Fort Lauderdale, between the Kentucky mafia and the Oxy cartel over control of the lucrative pain clinic market. Latinos are turning up dead, hillbillies are wandering the beach trampling sand castles, and cops continue arresting doctors wriggling out of office windows.

But it's never really a party until Serge and Coleman arrive. Cruising down U.S. 1, Captain Florida and his perpetually altered sidekick are on a mission to film the best reality show ever!

Back at their motel, the McDougalls are peeking out the curtains. They've become very popular, especially with Serge, who believes he's found the perfect stars for the pilot of his new TV series.

Are the McDougalls safer with Serge or should they take their chances on the mean streets?

Will Coleman get tired of signing autographs?

Can pelicans be used as murder weapons?

Is time running out for our heroes?

And, finally, the question still on everyone's lips: What's up with Florida? Stay tuned for all the answers in...The Riptide Ultra-Glide!

©2013 Tim Dorsey (P)2013 HarperCollinsPublishers

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

4.2 (136 )
5 star
 (68)
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4.1 (124 )
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4.3 (122 )
5 star
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3 star
 (13)
2 star
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Performance
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  •  
    James FRANKLIN, WI, United States 02-20-13
    James FRANKLIN, WI, United States 02-20-13 Member Since 2012
    HELPFUL VOTES
    60
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    "More Serge and Coleman"

    Readers of this series will have to continue with this episode. New listeners would be better advised to start at the beginning of the series, but not completely necessary. As usual, Dorsey pokes at Florida issues, (violence and crime), and even some local Wisconsin political crazyness. Same great reader. He does an excellent job with this zanyness and the characters.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Elizabeth St. Johns, FL, United States 02-18-13
    Elizabeth St. Johns, FL, United States 02-18-13 Member Since 2011
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Tim Dorsey is a genius"

    Because I love historical fiction that is sommetimes very heavy with drama, Its always great to read another fun story about Serge Storms and Coleman. It's like having a couple of crazy friends that you love to hear about their antics to have a lighthearted and sometimes a laugh-out-loud time with. Another great work by Tim Dorsey.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Joan Rice, VA, United States 09-15-13
    Joan Rice, VA, United States 09-15-13 Member Since 2001

    Say something about yourself!

    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Unbelievably Funny"

    Tim Dorsey comes up with some of the most ridiculous phrases and situations one can imagine. When I first start one of his books, I think 'no, this is just too much' yet if I listen much beyond 15 minutes, I'm hooked! I typically read spy and murder mysteries and Dorsey is a nice switch to lighten up my listens! Give any of his books a go! I do prefer the previous reader. Serge sounded more Serge-like in the earlier books.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    C. Byrd Fort Worth, TX 07-11-13
    C. Byrd Fort Worth, TX 07-11-13 Member Since 2007
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Full speed ahead!"
    Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

    Oh, yes, the whole series is a must listen/read


    What was one of the most memorable moments of The Riptide Ultra-Glide?

    the double cross, you know


    Which character – as performed by Oliver Wyman – was your favorite?

    all of them, but Serge is the best


    Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?

    the end, because now, I have to wait for a new one to come out!!!


    Any additional comments?

    going thru withdrawal waiting on the next installment

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    ShowerHead Tallahassee, FL, United States 07-10-13
    ShowerHead Tallahassee, FL, United States 07-10-13
    ratings
    REVIEWS
    2
    2
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "Serge isn't a member of Alvin and the Chipmunks"
    What made the experience of listening to The Riptide Ultra-Glide the most enjoyable?

    Dorsey once again delivers a frightfully realistic tale of the the twisted Fun House that is the State of Florida. A place where only the iced-coffee and water propelled Serge A. Storms inflicts his own delightful vengeance on modern day Carpet Baggers and con men.


    Who was your favorite character and why?

    Serge...of course.


    What do you think the narrator could have done better?

    This is the first audio book that I've listened to from Dorsey. I've read all of his previous books. I didn't like that Serge had this higher-pitched, somewhat spastic sounding voice. With that said, it did assist in always letting the reader know exactly when Serge was speaking.


    Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

    Very enjoyable listen, References to places and issues in the State were always dead-on! If you're a Dorsey fan, I strongly recommend it.


    Any additional comments?

    Once you're able to get past the fact that Serge sounds like Alvin from the Chipmunks, the story is excellent.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Terri Hartsville, SC, United States 07-08-13
    Terri Hartsville, SC, United States 07-08-13 Member Since 2012
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "No Point to this Story"
    What would have made The Riptide Ultra-Glide better?

    Less of the word "said" and actually having a story line.


    Which scene was your favorite?

    Interesting opening - downhill from there


    If you could play editor, what scene or scenes would you have cut from The Riptide Ultra-Glide?

    The two bumbling idiots that basically were pointless in the first two hours of listening.


    Any additional comments?

    I am trying new authors and was disappointed with this selection. The lack of purpose of the story was hard to get past. This story just rambled in no direction at all. If you wait it out, good luck - I couldn't.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Richard 04-15-13
    Richard 04-15-13 Member Since 2010

    I live on Puget Sound and my wife and I spend our summers on our boat out on the water.

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    "Lots of Fun"

    This is the most fun you can have reading about a serial killer. Serge and Coleman are up to their old tricks showing non-Floridians the "real Florida," including Mac 10's.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Paul Scoles New York, NY 03-18-13
    Paul Scoles New York, NY 03-18-13 Member Since 2009

    The Cat reviews

    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "what a combination!"

    What could possibly be more fun than a Tim Dorsey book read by Oliver Wyman? (answer, a Christopher Moore book read by Oliver Wyman, but its a near miss). Dorsey takes his irrepressible Serge through a chase involving two sets of drug dealers, shady pain clinics, Coleman becoming a celebrity, and an unsuspecting couple from Minnesota. Never lose track of even chance characters in a Dorsey novel, because they'll probably be back. I'm particularly fond of his way of retelling, Rasholmon like, the tale from different angles.

    Wyman, as always, is a joy. He's like a one man repertory company. He's got a voice (the right voice!) for each character, he never confuses them, or you. I've got a library full of books i wouldn't otherwise read, just because Wyman reads them.

    "Rip tide Ultra Glide" ends with Serge racing off with the couple, and you're glad the story hasn't ended , because you know there's another on the way.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    monica ROSWELL, GA, United States 03-11-13
    monica ROSWELL, GA, United States 03-11-13 Member Since 2010
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "One of Dorsey's BEST!!"
    Where does The Riptide Ultra-Glide rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

    One of Tim Dorsey's BEST. You gotta love Serge!! Him and Coleman are in great form in this book. Tim Dorsey can do no wrong for me, but this was one of his best. A great RIDE!


    What other book might you compare The Riptide Ultra-Glide to and why?

    There is no comparision! Fun, Funny, Strange, Horrific, all at the same time.


    What about Oliver Wyman’s performance did you like?

    Excellent, He IS Serge and Coleman!!


    Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?

    The entire book moved you to laugh and to be sick all at the same time.


    Any additional comments?

    LOVE, LOVE, LOVE!! But you have to have a sense of humor!!

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Carla 03-05-13
    Carla 03-05-13
    ratings
    REVIEWS
    3
    3
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    Story
    "Not Surfing"
    Where does The Riptide Ultra-Glide rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

    It was not what I thought. However, I just picked it out without reading much about the actual storyline. I did like it. I thought it was different, and not the same predictalble storyline. I would reccomend it.


    What was one of the most memorable moments of The Riptide Ultra-Glide?

    I couldn't pick one. Just the way the 2 main characters intereacted with each other.


    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
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