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Lamb
- The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal
- Narrated by: Fisher Stevens
- Length: 15 hrs and 20 mins
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Magical Apocalypse "Lite"
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Publisher's summary
Verily, the story Biff has to tell is a miraculous one, filled with remarkable journeys, magic, healings, kung fu, corpse reanimations, demons, and hot babes. Even the considerable wiles and devotion of the Savior's pal may not be enough to divert Joshua from his tragic destiny. But there's no one who loves Josh more (except maybe "Maggie," Mary of Magdalan) and Biff isn't about to let his extraordinary pal suffer and ascend without a fight.
Critic reviews
"Moore...gets style points for his wild imagination as Biff recalls his journey with Jesus...into and out of the clutches of Balthasar, then into a Buddhist monastery in China and finally off to India, where they dabble in the spiritual and erotic aspects of Hinduism. The author gets more serious in his climax, offering a relatively straightforward, heartfelt account of the Passion and Christ's final days that includes an intriguing spin on how the Resurrection might have happened." (Publishers Weekly)
"An instant classic...terrific, funny, and poignant." (Rocky Mountain News)
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Aminah lives an idyllic life until she is brutally separated from her home and forced on a journey that turns her from a daydreamer into a resilient woman. Wurche, the willful daughter of a chief, is desperate to play an important role in her father's court. These two women's lives converge as infighting among Wurche's people threatens the region, during the height of the slave trade at the end of the nineteenth century. The Hundred Wells of Salaga offers a remarkable view of slavery and how the scramble for Africa affected the lives of everyday people.
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Wicked
- The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West
- By: Gregory Maguire
- Narrated by: John McDonough
- Length: 19 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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Heralded as an instant classic of fantasy literature, Maguire has written a wonderfully imaginative retelling of The Wizard of Oz told from the Wicked Witch's point of view. More than just a fairy tale for adults, Wicked is a meditation on the nature of good and evil.
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It's not easy being green
- By PangaeaReads on 07-30-08
By: Gregory Maguire
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Muhammad: A Story of the Last Prophet
- By: Deepak Chopra MD
- Narrated by: Deepak Chopra
- Length: 8 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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Born into the factious world of war-torn Arabia, Muhammad's life is a gripping and inspiring story of one man's tireless fight for unity and peace. In a world where greed and injustice ruled, Muhammad created change by affecting hearts and minds. Just as the story of Jesus embodies the message of Christianity, Muhammad's life reveals the core of Islam. Deepak Chopra shares the life of Muhammad as never before, putting his teachings in a new light.
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Poorly written and poorly narrated
- By Shahrad Milanfar on 10-21-10
By: Deepak Chopra MD
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The House of the Stag
- By: Kage Baker
- Narrated by: Sean Crisden
- Length: 13 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Before the Riders came to their remote valley, the Yendri led a tranquil, pastoral life. When the Riders conquered and enslaved them, only a few escaped to the forests. Rebellion wasn't the Yendri way; they hid, or passively resisted, taking consolation in the prophecies of their spiritual leader. Only one possessed the necessary rage to fight back: Gard the foundling, half-demon, who began a one-man guerrilla war against the Riders.
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Delightfully humorous
- By Katherine on 09-09-11
By: Kage Baker
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The Tiger's Daughter
- By: K Arsenault Rivera
- Narrated by: Caroline McLaughlin
- Length: 14 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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The Hokkaran Empire has conquered every land within their bold reach - but failed to notice a lurking darkness festering within the people. Now their border walls begin to crumble, and villages fall to demons swarming out of the forests. Away on the silver steppes, the remaining tribes of nomadic Qorin retreat and protect their own, having bartered a treaty with the empire, exchanging inheritance through the dynasties. It is up to two young warriors, raised together across borders since their prophesied birth, to save the world from the encroaching demons.
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Writing format that didn't work for this book
- By kara-karina on 02-24-18
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The Sword-Edged Blonde
- By: Alex Bledsoe
- Narrated by: Stefan Rudnicki
- Length: 8 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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It should have been a case like any other: a missing princess, a king willing to pay in gold for her return. But before he realizes it, private investigator Eddie LaCrosse, a slightly shopworn sword jockey with a talent for discretion and detection, is swept up in a web of mystery and deceit involving a brutally murdered royal heir, a queen accused of an unspeakable crime, and the tragic past he thought he'd left behind.
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No Redeeming Qualities
- By MightyMite68 on 09-27-20
By: Alex Bledsoe
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Henna House
- By: Nomi Eve
- Narrated by: Hillary Huber
- Length: 13 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Yemen in 1920: After passage of the Orphan's Decree, any unbetrothed Jewish child left orphaned will be instantly adopted by the local Muslim community. With her parents' health failing, and no spousal prospects in sight, Adela Damari's situation looks dire until her uncle arrives from a faraway city, bringing with him a cousin and aunt who introduce Adela to the powerful rituals of henna tattooing.
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historical fiction, read like an autobiography.
- By Anonymous User on 02-11-19
By: Nomi Eve
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Women of the Bible
- Jael's Story
- By: Ann Burton
- Narrated by: Effie Johnson
- Length: 6 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Ann Burton - best-selling author of Rahab's Story - pens a sweeping historical novel about the Biblical heroine who risks all by wielding a tent peg and mallet. In this compelling tale of faith, courage, and romance, Jael boldly seizes a pivotal opportunity to free Israelites - and herself - from years of oppression.
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when she choose the one true GOD.
- By Ruth Reynoso on 01-04-24
By: Ann Burton
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Fishers of Men
- Kingdom and the Crown, Vol. 1
- By: Gerald N. Lund
- Narrated by: Larry A. McKeever
- Length: 22 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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In an ancient land in a time foretold by prophets, a babe was born beneath a shining star. Thirty years later, Jesus of Nazareth began teaching a message of hope, peace, and love. He claimed to be the Son of God, and his words - and his life - would change the world. Though David ben Joseph is quick to accept Jesus as the Messiah, the rest of his family is more cautious.
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Please more books like these.
- By Elizabeth on 07-06-16
By: Gerald N. Lund
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A Dirty Job
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People start dropping dead around Charlie, giant ravens perch on his building, and it seems that everywhere he goes, a dark presence whispers to him from under the streets. Strange names start appearing on his nightstand notepad, and before he knows it, those people end up dead, too. Yup, it seems that Charlie Asher has been recruited for a new job, an unpleasant but utterly necessary one: Death.
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Great Listen!
- By Janie on 03-24-06
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Noir
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It's not every afternoon that an enigmatic, comely blonde named Stilton (like the cheese) walks into the scruffy gin joint where Sammy "Two Toes" Tiffin tends bar. It's love at first sight, but before Sammy can make his move, an air force general named Remy arrives with some urgent business. 'Cause when you need something done, Sammy is the guy to go to; he's got the connections on the street.
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A Laugh Riot, Inconsistently Delivered
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Practical Demonkeeping
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In Christopher Moore's ingenious debut novel, we meet one of the most memorably mismatched pairs in the annals of literature. The good-looking one is one-hundred-year-old ex-seminarian and "roads" scholar Travis O'Hearn. The green one is Catch, a demon with a nasty habit of eating most of the people he meets.
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I named my cat after the demon Catch
- By colleen on 08-24-11
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Fluke
- Or, I Know Why the Winged Whale Sings
- By: Christopher Moore
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Just why do humpback whales sing? That's the question that has marine behavioral biologist Nate Quinn and his crew poking, charting, recording, and photographing very big, wet, gray marine mammals - until the extraordinary day when a whale lifts its tail into the air to display a cryptic message spelled out in foot-high letters: Bite Me.
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Best way to ruin a good book.
- By colleen on 02-18-08
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Razzmatazz
- A Novel
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San Francisco, 1947. Bartender Sammy “Two Toes” Tiffin and the rest of the Cookie’s Coffee Irregulars—a ragtag bunch of working mugs last seen in Noir—are on the hustle: they’re trying to open a driving school; shanghai an abusive Swedish stevedore; get Mable, the local madam, and her girls to a Christmas party at the State Hospital without alerting the overzealous head of the S.F.P.D. vice squad.
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Noir Has Never Been So Funny
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Coyote Blue
- By: Christopher Moore
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Overall
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With New York Times best-sellers like Bloodsucking Fiends to his credit, Christopher Moore has developed a devoted cult following. Coyote Blue introduces Samuel Hunter, a young man who's running from his past while being tormented by an ancient Crow God with a talent for mischief.
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ehhhh...
- By Michelle on 08-17-09
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A Dirty Job
- By: Christopher Moore
- Narrated by: Fisher Stevens
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Overall
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Performance
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People start dropping dead around Charlie, giant ravens perch on his building, and it seems that everywhere he goes, a dark presence whispers to him from under the streets. Strange names start appearing on his nightstand notepad, and before he knows it, those people end up dead, too. Yup, it seems that Charlie Asher has been recruited for a new job, an unpleasant but utterly necessary one: Death.
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Great Listen!
- By Janie on 03-24-06
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Noir
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- Length: 9 hrs and 3 mins
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
It's not every afternoon that an enigmatic, comely blonde named Stilton (like the cheese) walks into the scruffy gin joint where Sammy "Two Toes" Tiffin tends bar. It's love at first sight, but before Sammy can make his move, an air force general named Remy arrives with some urgent business. 'Cause when you need something done, Sammy is the guy to go to; he's got the connections on the street.
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A Laugh Riot, Inconsistently Delivered
- By Maggie May on 04-18-18
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Practical Demonkeeping
- By: Christopher Moore
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In Christopher Moore's ingenious debut novel, we meet one of the most memorably mismatched pairs in the annals of literature. The good-looking one is one-hundred-year-old ex-seminarian and "roads" scholar Travis O'Hearn. The green one is Catch, a demon with a nasty habit of eating most of the people he meets.
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I named my cat after the demon Catch
- By colleen on 08-24-11
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Fluke
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Just why do humpback whales sing? That's the question that has marine behavioral biologist Nate Quinn and his crew poking, charting, recording, and photographing very big, wet, gray marine mammals - until the extraordinary day when a whale lifts its tail into the air to display a cryptic message spelled out in foot-high letters: Bite Me.
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Best way to ruin a good book.
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San Francisco, 1947. Bartender Sammy “Two Toes” Tiffin and the rest of the Cookie’s Coffee Irregulars—a ragtag bunch of working mugs last seen in Noir—are on the hustle: they’re trying to open a driving school; shanghai an abusive Swedish stevedore; get Mable, the local madam, and her girls to a Christmas party at the State Hospital without alerting the overzealous head of the S.F.P.D. vice squad.
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Noir Has Never Been So Funny
- By Stefan Filipovits on 06-24-22
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Coyote Blue
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With New York Times best-sellers like Bloodsucking Fiends to his credit, Christopher Moore has developed a devoted cult following. Coyote Blue introduces Samuel Hunter, a young man who's running from his past while being tormented by an ancient Crow God with a talent for mischief.
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ehhhh...
- By Michelle on 08-17-09
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Sacre Bleu
- A Comedy d'Art
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Overall
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In July 1890, Vincent van Gogh went into a cornfield and shot himself. Or did he? Why would an artist at the height of his creative powers attempt to take his life... and then walk a mile to a doctor's house for help? Who was the crooked little "color man" Vincent had claimed was stalking him across France? And why had the painter recently become deathly afraid of a certain shade of blue? These are just a few of the questions confronting Vincent's friends who vow to discover the truth of van Gogh's untimely death.
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Is Nothing is Sacre'?
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Island of the Sequined Love Nun
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Take a wonderfully crazed excursion into the demented heart of a tropical paradise - a world of cargo cults, cannibals, mad scientists, ninjas, and talking fruit bats. Our bumbling hero is Tucker Case, a hopeless geek trapped in a cool guy's body, who makes a living as a pilot for the Mary Jean Cosmetics Corporation.
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Fun Read
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Bloodsucking Fiends
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A striking red-head, 20-something Jody is attacked and transformed into a vampire while walking home one night in downtown San Francisco. Befriending 19-year-old Tommy, Jody tries to understand her new undead life, but trouble finds her when the cops start suspecting Tommy of being a local bloodsucking serial killer.
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Bloodsucking FUN!
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Noir
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San Francisco 1947: Es kommt nicht jeden Tag vor, dass eine rätselhafte, anmutige Blondine namens Stilton (ja, wie der Käse) in den verlotterten Laden kommt, in dem Sammy "Two Toes" Tiffin Gin ausschenkt. Es ist Liebe auf den ersten Blick. Aber bevor Sammy den ersten Schritt machen kann, betritt ein Air Force General mit einem eiligen Auftrag für ihn den Saloon. Doch Sammy hat eigentlich besseres zu tun: Er arbeitet an einer eigenen Geschäftsidee. Als aber an der Pazifikküste ein unbekanntes Flugobjekt gesichtet wird und Stilton plötzlich spurlos verschwindet, muss er sich seinen dunkelsten Geheimnissen stellen, um seinen Käse zu retten.
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Excellent German Translation and Performance
- By Verena Fuchs on 05-24-21
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Icarus Falls
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Icarus Falls is the latest poetry book out by Christopher Moore. Using a proto-mythological theme, the poems in Icarus Falls combine personal poetry with themes from mythology, particularly a heavy influence of Ancient Greek mythology.
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Not imprrssed
- By Blake on 10-17-22
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A Confederacy of Dunces
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The hero of John Kennedy Toole's incomparable, Pulitzer Prize-winning comic classic is one Ignatius J. Reilly, "huge, obese, fractious, fastidious, a latter-day Gargantua, a Don Quixote of the French Quarter". His story bursts with wholly original characters, denizens of New Orleans' lower depths, incredibly true-to-life dialogue, and the zaniest series of high and low comic adventures.
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Well Done
- By Jon on 09-18-05
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For fans of Tina Fey and David Sedaris - Internet star Jenny Lawson, aka The Bloggess, makes her literary debut. Jenny Lawson realized that the most mortifying moments of our lives - the ones we'd like to pretend never happened - are in fact the ones that define us. In Let's Pretend This Never Happened, Lawson takes readers on a hilarious journey recalling her bizarre upbringing in rural Texas, her devastatingly awkward high school years, and her relationship with her long-suffering husband, Victor.
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Actually, not for fans of Sedaris and Fey
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The Gospel According to Jesus Christ
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blasphemous story
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By: Giovanni Pontiero - translator, and others
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Subtly Funny Musings on Life Experiences
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Somewhere on the frontier between thought and reality exists the Discworld, a parallel time and place that might sound and smell very much like our own, but which looks completely different. Particularly as it’s carried though space on the back of a giant turtle (sex unknown). It plays by different rules. But then, some things are the same everywhere. The Disc’s very existence is about to be threatened by a strange new blight: the world’s first tourist, upon whose survival rests the peace and prosperity of the land.
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TERRIBLE Narration!
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Good Omens
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According to The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch (the world's only completely accurate book of prophecies, written in 1655, before she exploded), the world will end on a Saturday. Next Saturday, in fact. Just before dinner. So the armies of Good and Evil are amassing, Atlantis is rising, frogs are falling, tempers are flaring. Everything appears to be going according to Divine Plan.
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Brilliant and epic
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Audie Award, Humor, 2016. In Furiously Happy, number-one New York Times best-selling author Jenny Lawson explores her lifelong battle with mental illness. A hysterical, ridiculous book about crippling depression and anxiety? That sounds like a terrible idea. But terrible ideas are what Jenny does best.
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Review by a Social Worker
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By: Jenny Lawson
What listeners say about Lamb
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall
- Timothy
- 08-19-08
Blasphemus or righteous?
I was skeptical of this book. I thought, how dare someone write their own version of events?! But I decided to have an open mind, after all, I absolutely loved "A Dirty Job". So, here's Biff & Josh (Jesus) growing up in Jerusalem. They have a typical childhood, just two young boys growing up in Roman controlled Israel. Getting into typical little boy mischief with the Roman guards, going to school together, and both having a crush on the same girl (Mary of Magdalen) ; with the exception that Josh must deal with being The Messiah. He knows he's The Messiah, because his Mother won't let him forget, being the stereo-typical Jewish Mother that she is.
Finally Josh and Biff come of age, and it's time for Josh to figure out what exactly a Messiah is supposed to do. So, off they go to find The Three Wise Men. Along the way, they learn the ways of the Buddhists, Hindu's and even walk into a cult sacrifice ceremony, before finally returning home.
I have to say here, that through out all of their adventures, Josh remains true to who and what he is. The one thing I liked most about this book is the believability. Reading the Bible, many of the Gospels are almost surreal, and the speech difficult to understand. Moore brings everything down to Earth, gives Jesus errrr I mean Josh, a personality that fits, just a down to earth man who happens to be the Son of God, and can heal the sick, raise the dead, etc... Even conversations that took place in The Bible are brought down to earth, and written in such a manner that allows one to actually believe that is the way they would have gone down. So, was the book Blasphemous, or righteous? Well, since it never really deviated from actual events, I would have to say righteous. One just need to keep an open mind while reading, or listening as the case may be.
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123 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Gene
- 04-17-07
Perfect for intelligent comedy!
After many laughs in the first 10 minutes, I couldn't believe this book could contain 15 hours of worthwhile listening. Currently at hour 13, I can't believe the journey I have taken with J.F.C. and Biff -- experiencing wonders of the East and loving the bibilical references that have me chuckling every minute - sometimes several times a minute. As a semi-learned bibilcal scholar, I found the author's creativity to be brilliant! For example - did you know how chinese food became tradition on J.C.'s b-day? Or how bunnies became associated with bad J.C. days? Now you will.
I'm very impressed Moore could put so many humorous references for such an epistle! Perfect for a long drive, or a whole weekend of cooking for Easter dinner! Best in a couple long segments rather than several smaller segments!
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78 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Hope
- 04-02-07
A Worthy Book, indeed
This is a favorite book of mine. Biff is Jesus' best childhood friend, and Biff has been raised from the dead to write his witness of Jesus' young life. Problem is, Biff is a real smart-arse. Typical of Christopher More, there is plenty of chuckles. Fortunately for us, it's better written than anything else he's written. I've given this book to friends of different faiths, both liberal and conservative, and did not O-ffend. Fisher Steven's narration is a bit scratchy, but you get past it. The witness account of Biff is funny, touching, moving and lasting.
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54 people found this helpful
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
- Kim
- 12-30-11
Lamb Bam Thank You Ma'am!!!
OK - I know that heading is way too corny but you should be thankful you don't have to read the other ones I came up with :) I LOVE LOVE LOVE this book - I'm on my 3rd listen since I used my very first Audible credit to get it - over 100 books later I still rate it in my top 5 of all time! If you are religious in an "uptight-don't-make-jokes-about-the-Bible-or-you-will-burn-in hell" way then you probably won't like it - a sense of humor is a requirement for this one. I think Jesus would have laughed his ass off reading this - so lighten up already and enjoy the holy genius that Christopher Moore has to offer.
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48 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Talia
- 09-19-07
Not your typical Easter story
I am in love with book. I downloaded it on a whim, and then avoided it for a while, not really sure if I wanted to listen to a book that some might deem a bit iffy in how it dealt with the life of Christ.
Boy, am I glad I listened to it. This book, more than anything I've read or listened to in church growing up, really made me step back and look at my faith and the life of Christ/Joshua in a completely different way. Highly irreverent, extremely witty and chock full of laugh moments, "Lamb" made me step back and look at Joshua as a real person with real issues and emotions for the first time.
How can you not love Biff? He's eccentric, selfish and carnal - but his heart is 100% with his friends. We could all use a friend like that.
I know people have written that they weren't too keen on Stevens' narrative - but I LOVED it. I think he did an excellent job - especially with Joshua's voice.
Two thumbs up! And great for traveling across Texas!
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32 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Tiffany
- 03-08-08
Moore is hilarious!!
I read my first Christopher Moore book when "A Dirty Job" was released. Since then, I have read EVERYTHING he has published. I absolutely love his stuff. He is one of the most entertaining writers I have had the pleasure of coming across. "Lamb" is definitely one of my favorites. The first time I read it, I laughed so hard I cried. When I saw that it was finally offered on Audible, I had to get it. Again, I laughed until I cried. The story of Christ's lost years from the perspective of Biff is so incredibly blasphemus that I am sure Moore will go to Hell for it, but hopefully God will give him a glass of water to take along for the trip just because Moore made people laugh. Maybe the Devil will let Catch keep him company (in his non-eating form, of coarse). I'd give this 10 stars if I could. This is a must read, but you have to go into it with an open mind and leave any preconceived notions about Jesus Christ behind. Remember, IT'S A COMEDY AND IT'S FICTION!!!!! Once you get past that, enjoy the wild ride.
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Overall
- Courtney
- 12-01-08
Funny and Memorable
The first thirty to forty-five minutes of this book, I wasn't sure how I felt, but as I got pulled into the story more and more, I loved it. The narrator's voice is perfect for the main character and the story gets better as Biff and Jesus travel around the world learning different philosophies.
Some of the jokes are a little low brow, but it works and it's funny.
It's one of those books you listen to and are sad when it's over.
I thoroughly enjoyed it and do recomend it to others.
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- Stephen McLeod
- 06-17-08
Wonderfully made, wonderfully read
The story of Jesus' missing years - his adolesence and early adulthood - is here told by his decidedly worldly best friend, Biff. Don't worry; it's not disrespectful. It's actually joyous, in its own hilarious way. The idea that Christ had a sense of humor was a huge theological heresy in the 13th century. It shouldn't be so today. As on "A Dirty Job", also by Moore, Fisher Stevens (the narrator) is really, really good. He completely inhabits the prose and totally sells it. I wish he had narrated all of Mr Moore's books.
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- Julie W. Capell
- 11-02-13
Offensive for all the wrong reasons
I notice that most of the other people who rated this as a one-star read are women. Seems that I am not alone in not being able to see the "humor" in the Mary Magdalene rape scene, masturbation, animal fornication, or the endless descriptions of a 13-year-old boy's innermost thoughts upon seeing [insert here a part of the female anatomy normally covered by clothing]. Don't misunderstand me: I wasn't offended because these despicable/schoolboy acts and thoughts are attributed to Christ. The few and far between parts where Christ actually makes an appearance in the book are really quite benign and non-controversial. No, all of this nonsense is perpetrated by the main character, his best friend Biff. I tried to keep going, hoping it would get better, but by page 150 or so (not sure . . . I was listening to it as an audio book) where Biff is being tended to by eight Chinese concubines for pages upon pages, I just had to quit.
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- Jennifer Glover
- 09-14-12
WWJD? He'd buy this book!
Would you listen to Lamb again? Why?
I actually listened to Lamb twice in a row. I mean, I finished listening on the way to work one day, and I started over from the beginning on my way home. I didn't want the story to end.
What was one of the most memorable moments of Lamb?
On Passover night, when Maggie (Mary Magdalene) anointed Joshua's feet with oil, I cried so hard I almost couldn't see the road (as I was driving to work). It was one of the most beautiful and touching renditions of the story I've ever heard.
What about Fisher Stevens’s performance did you like?
I think it's definitely tricky to tell a story about the life of Jesus without making it sound cliche or just totally sacrilegious, and I believe that Christopher Moore did a fantastic job with that (although I'm sure some will heatedly disagree with me), but in addition, Fisher Stevens did an amazing job of keeping the lightheartedness, the humanity, and the love well delivered throughout the story. He does an excellent rendition of a Jewish mother to be sure. His interpretation of the friendship between Biff and Joshua was inspired.
If you were to make a film of this book, what would be the tag line be?
Sex, Lies, and Matza: Second-coming this Passover to a theater near you.
Any additional comments?
I think Mel Brooks could film the hell out of this book.
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