Welcome to the world of She Comes First, where the mystery of female satisfaction is solved and the tongue is proven mightier than the sword. According to Ian Kerner, clinical sexologist and evangelist of the female orgasm, oral sex has long been deemed an optional aspect of foreplay, but, in fact, it's coreplay: simply the best way for leading a woman through the entire process of sexual response.
Fun, informative, and easy to read, She Comes First is a virtual encyclopedia of female pleasure, detailing dozens of tried-and-true techniques for consistently satisfying a woman and step-by-step instructions to ensure success. These simple methods represent a new era in sexual intimacy, one in which the exchange of pleasure occurs on a level playing field and fulfillment is mutual.
She Comes First exuberantly offers a fresh new sexual philosophy that inspires every man to make a mantra of Rhett Butler's infamous line to Scarlett O'Hara, "You should be kissed, and often, and by someone who knows how."
For Adults Only: You must be 18 years or older to purchase.
Find out what else is on Ian Kerner's mind in this interview with the author.
©2004 Ian Kerner; (P)2005 HarperCollins Publishers, Inc.
"An entire book written strictly for the pleasure of women by a man. Hallelujah!" (Playgirl)
It falls right in line with other topics on sex. Yes a man wants to please a woman but if she don't talk to you how do you know. Finally a book that does tell you how to know and how to get her the enjoyment she deserves.
No one favorite.
Being honest and saying it hiw it is.
Keep writing on this subject
pretty much what everyone else is saying its an okay read but the author does sound a bit out of place reading it, still he helps with some toppics....
Dr. Ian has done men a great favor in putting together a clear, easy to follow guide to orally pleasuring a woman. Surprisingly, I even found his clinical descriptive definitions of ten parts of a woman's genitals very helpful. Its very comforting to finally know "what's what" down there. I continue to replay and review the terminology and incorporate his "core-play" techniques with great results. This is a skill that's great to have!
I was a 42 year old "virgin" to oral sex. I listened to this book and even told my girlfriend about it. She dismissed it as hooy. Then I actually mustered the courage to try it out on her and she called me a liar. She said there is no way I could have learned what I did to her from a book. We are now listening to it together and having a very enjoyable time. Thanks, Ian, for wrighting such a helpful book.
Just when you thought I knew it all... I found this book to be well written and tasteful (no pun intended). The author did a good job of presenting the subject matter in a very straightforward and easy to understand way. I learned things about the female anatomy that I had never heard of before and other things became clearer. I would recommend this title to those in a monogamous and secure relationship that want to improve their intimacy. Well done treatise of a delicate and not much talked about subject. I have tried some of the techniques and found them to be very useful.
The author spends most of his time referencing other studies and authors, while providing little original material. He also made a poor choice electing himself as narrator, it made a long ride much longer.
I have to admit, however, with 31 minutes remaining, I began fast forwarding, and may have missed answers to all my questions regarding love and the meaning of life. But, I doubt it.
I am having a hard time getting even an hour into this book. The narrator sounds like a guy who has never been laid in his life, and constantly smacks into the microphone. Getting sexual advice for this guy is like getting tax advice from Joe Francis.
I purchased this audio after learning about the author in the byline of an article he had written in the past that I really got some benefit out of. This book is great if and only if you are looking to learn ONE thing, and that's how to be pretty darned good at pleasing your spouse (or any other willing woman I guess) with your tongue and fingers, etc.
It seems that the author has something against vaginal intercourse, and this comes through in his writing. My take away is that he considers intercourse as secondary to cunnilingus, and this book focuses entirely on the latter, and almost seems to downplay the enjoyment a woman is able to get from intercourse. My wife, although not someone who generally enjoys oral over actual intercourse, requires penetration to orgasm even when she gets "revved up" by oral sex.
Ladies, if you like receiving great oral, buy this audiobook for your man. Guys, if you like giving it and your lady does too, get the book. It has a wealth of information, probably more than most textbooks on female anatomy. It's pretty clear the author has done his homework in that department.
Actual "case studies" I'm not so sure about. There is definitely a slant, and the author seems intent on making cunnilingus the norm as the primary source of sexual pleasure for a woman. He may correct in that most women can get off easier using these techniques than via penetration, it just doesn't apply too much to my particular relationship.
He's passionate about the subject though. I've gotta give him that!
She Comes First is an excellent book full of useful information. The book is a bestseller and justifiably so. I can definitely recommend it from experience.
The audiobook version, however, has two huge issues that should definitely be corrected in a future edition.
1>The text of the book should have been adapted for audio. The book is divided up into five parts, those parts divided into some 20 chapters, and some chapters are divided into subchapters (confusingly called "Parts"). Even on repeat listening it is very easy to get lost. Adding to the confusion is that there are also some very long numbered lists in this book. You *really* have to pay close attention.
2> Ian Kerner has written a book that is both useful and intelligent. The tone of his book is forthright (a manifesto, he calls it at one point) and ranges from humorous to heartfelt. However, his delivery of this material is tone deaf. Descriptions of ecstasy, polemics about safe sex, ribald stories of other cultures, and calls to action are related in a near-emotionless, clinical drone. What should be engaging and exciting (and generally is) is delivered in the tones of someone reading the phone book.
Harper Audio usually does a much better job that this with their adaptations. I'm not sure what happened here.
Overall, I still give it a 3 out of 5 because the material is so good. But in the hands of a reader who has the ability to emote, this would have been a home run.
Great detailed reference, for one of my favorite passtimes. Lots of good tips, for us guys who want to increase our skills in this area, for HER pleasure!
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