Different

Gender and Our Primate Heritage

By: Frans de Waal

Narrated by: Jonathan Davis

Length: 12 hrs and 55 mins

Publisher's summary

In Different, world-renowned primatologist Frans de Waal draws on decades of observation and studies of both human and animal behavior to argue that despite the linkage between gender and biological sex, biology does not automatically support the traditional gender roles in human societies. While humans and other primates do share some behavioral differences, biology offers no justification for existing gender inequalities.

Using chimpanzees and bonobos to illustrate this point—two ape relatives that are genetically equally close to humans—de Waal challenges widely held beliefs about masculinity and femininity, and common assumptions about authority, leadership, cooperation, competition, filial bonds, and sexual behavior. Chimpanzees are male-dominated and violent, while bonobos are female-dominated and peaceful. In both species, political power needs to be distinguished from physical dominance. Power is not limited to the males, and both sexes show true leadership capacities.

Different is a fresh and thought-provoking approach to the long-running debate about the balance between nature and nurture, and where sex and gender roles fit in. De Waal peppers his discussion with details from his own life—a Dutch childhood in a family of six boys, his marriage to a French woman with a different orientation toward gender, and decades of academic turf wars over outdated scientific theories that have proven hard to dislodge from public discourse. He discusses sexual orientation, gender identity, and the limitations of the gender binary, exceptions to which are also found in other primates.

With humor, clarity, and compassion, Different seeks to broaden the conversation about human gender dynamics by promoting an inclusive model that embraces differences, rather than negating them.

Cover painting © 2022 Succession H. Matisse / Artists Rights Society (ARS), New York

©2022 Frans de Waal (P)2022 Recorded Books

Fantastic

I loved this book. It was fascinating and I learned a great deal.

I highly recommend it.

Excellent, Fascinating Book

Frans de Waal is so knowledgeable in his field. This book is wonderful and insightful.

Different by Frans de Waal

This was a terrific book that brought me back to my college sociology and anthropology studies and forward to a future of equality for all genders. Read it and learn how similar and how different we are from Chimps and Bonobos.

Another outstanding book from Frans de Waal!

I have read or listened to virtually all of the books Prof. Frans de Waal has written for a popular audience. I never fail to learn an incredible amount from each book. De Waal write beautifully and authoritatively about the primates he has studied over his lengthy career. I highly recommend this book for anyone interested in learning about primates and why we exhibit the traits we Homo sapiens do. Observing our closest primate relatives, the chimpanzees and bonobos, we can learn that we all share many common behaviors and traits, e.g. empathy and compassion.

Full of Insight and Nuance

Gender identity, sexuality, gender roles, nature/nurter, biology/society, gender stereotypes- what do our closest evolutionary ancestors (the chimpanzees and the bonobos) have to teach is about these all-to-often polarizing topics?

Frans de Waal tackles these topics head-on with fascinating stories that add texture and life to the scientific data and research regarding these subjects. I think that almost everyone will have at least a couple of their own personal assumptions challenged after reading this book, as it's conclusions don't land on either end of the ideological spectrum. If not, it will certainly add nuance and life to the conversation.

And, as any honest scientist will admit, there is still more to learn...

A perfect surprise.

I had no idea what this book was about when I bought it. I like Dr. DeWaal's work and trusted thatbthis book would be a good read. Excellent and relevant to our times. Check it out, it's almost like being on a mind trip but sober.

Worth the Read

I didn’t agree with everything - but it was a fascinating read that made me think. Definitely worth it !

Wonderfully insightful view into the primate world

The author speaks from a vast knowledge of primates - especially apes - built up over decades, and the much greater impartiality with which humans are able to observe other species than their own, allows for much more clarity on the actual makeup of primate societies and the roles of gender and sex than is common when talking about humans - given so many inbuilt biases and agendas. It’s much harder to look objectively at ourselves than at others.

There are many great insights in the book that help to ground the gender debate in a more solid foundation on fact, which is always a good starting point! In addition, it reveals an incredible beauty, subtlety, and intelligence in the natural order of ape societies, where gender and sex have their roles without leading to discrimination or counterproductive divisions. There are touching stories about how primates such as chimps and bonobos, show incredible care for one another, forgiveness, responsibility, selflessness, wisdom, and other qualities usually reserved for descriptions of humans. There seems to be almost no discrimination in the primate world based on physical appearance, and in general a much greater acceptance of relative differences - including non-typical gender presentations - than amongst humans. Once again in comparing humans to the rest of nature, one has the sinking feeling of humans coming up woefully short on many counts!

One of the many wonderful bits of information gleaned from the book, is that ape societies have both an alpha male and alpha female, and that neither is narcissistic and self aggrandising the way we usually use the term applies to humans. As in so many other ways, nature shows us that it doesn’t need to be either or, and that positions of power don’t need to be abused. In fact so much of human social organisation is a perversion of what we see in nature.

A few small parts of the book appear to be verging on pandering to the current culture war climate and may not age well, but they are few and far between - and perhaps a necessary pandering to allow safe passage of the rest of the book, which certainly throws up many well founded challenges to much of the current orthodoxy on sex and gender.

All in all an incredibly thoughtful, kind and wise book, with much to learn especially for any non-primatologists. I have a new found respect for the apes and hope one day again to see some of these wonderful animals in the wild.

de Waal weighs in on nature & environment inputs

By comparing the lives of primates and various other species with Homo Sapiens, de Waal illustrates the complexity of human nature. Clearly, in comparison, none of the species examined are entirely the product of their genetics. Meanwhile, environmental conditions factor most into the development of Homo Sapiens traits since our species has a more encompassing culture. The many examples provided for other species' traits compared to the most controversial Homo Sapiens traits are comprehensive and lead the reader to a more clear picture that "natural" is an acceptable explanation for nearly all traits.

De Waal's extensive understanding in his primary expertise coupled with his gift for plainly presenting complicated topics provides an entirely accessible text for consideration by open minded readers. The narration adds to the richness of de Waal's words.

Another great book about primate behavior

Frans de Waal gives us a peak into the lives of our private cousins to help us understand more about ourselves. While we aren't exactly like any other species, we have many things in common. Sometimes the commonalities are very surprising, especially when they relate to things we try to hide or ignore about humans.

In a world where we still have gender based violence and gender based discrimination, it helps to see our genders and the underlying biology of sex through different lenses. Some of the things we take for granted are wrong. Others are partially correct, but need more nuance to fully grasp what is "natural" and why.

As i finished this book i had many new things to think about. I look forward to my second time through the book, as well.