Cribsheet

A Data-Driven Guide to Better, More Relaxed Parenting, from Birth to Preschool

By: Emily Oster

Narrated by: Karissa Vacker

Length: 10 hrs and 36 mins

Publisher's summary

From the author of Expecting Better, an economist's guide to the early years of parenting.

With Expecting Better, award-winning economist Emily Oster spotted a need in the pregnancy market for advice that gave women the information they needed to make the best decision for their own pregnancies. By digging into the data, Oster found that much of the conventional pregnancy wisdom was wrong. In Cribsheet, she now tackles an even great challenge: decision-making in the early years of parenting.

As any new parent knows, there is an abundance of often-conflicting advice hurled at you from doctors, family, friends, and the internet. From the earliest days, parents get the message that they must make certain choices around feeding, sleep, and schedule or all will be lost. There's a rule - or three - for everything. But the benefits of these choices can be overstated, and the trade-offs can be profound. How do you make your own best decision?

Armed with the data, Oster finds that the conventional wisdom doesn't always hold up. She debunks myths around breastfeeding (not a panacea), sleep training (not so bad!), potty training (wait until they're ready or possibly bribe with M&Ms), language acquisition (early talkers aren't necessarily geniuses), and many other topics. She also shows parents how to think through freighted questions like if and how to go back to work, how to think about toddler discipline, and how to have a relationship and parent at the same time.

Economics is the science of decision-making, and Cribsheet is a thinking-parent's guide to the chaos and frequent misinformation of the early years. Emily Oster is a trained expert - and mom of two - who can empower us to make better, less fraught decisions - and stay sane in the years before preschool.

*Includes a Bonus PDF of graphs.

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.

©2019 Emily Oster (P)2019 Penguin Audio

Critic reviews

“Both refreshing and useful. With so many parenting theories driving us all a bit batty, this is the type of book that we need to help calm things down.” (LA Times)

“Parents who find comfort in statistics, and especially those who enjoy Malcolm Gladwell’s works, will appreciate [Cribsheet].” (Booklist)

"Cribsheet, a new book by Emily Oster of Brown University, shows that in the hectic haze of parenthood an economist’s perspective can prove surprisingly clarifying.... Parenting can be fraught. Cribsheet aims to help parents do better.” (The Economist)

Such a great book

I just love how Emily Oster presents information! I would recommend this book to any parent-to-be or parent with younger kids. She just does such a good job of tackling the mountains of data and research out there and explaining it all in an easy to stomach way manner, no pushiness either! I feel more confident making my own parenting decisions after hearing her logical summation of the various thought processes and related research.

Also, the narration is pleasant and easy to listen to, Karissa Vacker does a great job!

Practical Advice

Helpful to review the research and learn that there are many ways to parent, with pros and cons fitting each family uniquely.

Balanced and data focused

I loved all the information that was provided in such a straightforward and balanced way. In addition to data she discusses how to use that data to assess risks and make a decision that is right for YOUR family, which feels both refreshing and ultimately so helpful. Knowing some of these studies she brought out did help me make decisions I struggled with before and feel better about going toward as the kids get older. The narration was great and easy to follow!

Great insights

Loved learning about toddlerhood and choices for parents at this stage. The performance was great and not boring

Can’t stand the narrator’s voice.

The only complaint I have about this audiobook is the author’s choice of narrator. I don’t want to be read a bedtime story and the narrator’s tone is too gentle and quiet for a book of this nature. It really detracts from the great data and presentation of findings.

Love Emily Oster, not this narrator

I enjoy this book, but the lady narrating it is rather annoying to me. She sounds very worrisome the entire book and misses the author’s sense of humor. If you can stomach the narrator’s voice, give it a listen.

best parenting book out there

I absolutely loved this book! didn't feel guilted, just informed. the author has done all the heavy lifting of collecting the data and delivered it in an easily digestible package :) a delight!!

I (heart) Data and Science

With all the advice floating around, I love this unbiased, research driven yet compassionate approach

Baby-toddler cliff notes

This took me a while and I got a little bored because I had already read about most of the topics she discusses in detail; however, if you are looking for just one baby book to read, this one is great!! Wish I had skipped some of the other baby books and started off here. Touches on all the important topics without diving in too deep. You can always google the stuff you want to know more about later.

(Soon to be Dad) Loved the book! Here are the notes I took

Birth
Washing a baby
No issue with temp control
Doesn’t really matter.
Tubs are better than sponge

Circumcision
Not really any reason to do it or not.
Can prevent hetero HIV but doesn’t apply to US gays
US pediatrician groups says health outways risk but isn’t a big deal


Skin to skin contact helps with breast feeding
?


Rooming in (staying in the same room in the hospital)
Mixed - helps breastfeeding
Doesn’t do much to help

Infant weight
Baby’s always lose weight after birth
After 48 hours, 50% of infants lost 7% of their weight.
5% lost more than 10%
C section loses a little more
Formula fed only lose 3%
Quick formula supplement doesn’t hurt breast feeding later

Johndus
50% get it a little
Can cause brain damage but VERY rare. Only 3 a year in the US

Cord clipping
Pre me babies should wait
Full term baby delayed is good too
Lowers risk of anemia but increases johndus

Vitamin K injections.
No risks only benefits!

Eye antibiotics
If not at risk for STI, it’s not necessary
No risk though

Conclusion at 50:50 chapt 1



Chapt 2 coming home
Swaddle
Miracle blanket is a good brand
Really helps sleep! Longer and more REM
To prevent hip displaca, let the legs have room to wiggle
Make sure to let them sleep on their back
No issues with temperature

Collic and crying
Rule of 3: 3 hours of unexplained crying for 3 days a week for more than 3 weeks
Only 2% for this definition
Rule if 331: 3 hours 3 days for 1 week
9% have this
Goes away after 3 months
It’s ok to leave a baby crying while you take a shower
No herbs or gas pills work to reduce
Some studies show anti biotics help

Germ exposure
Don’t over sanitize everything !
Do prevent major contagious disease infections though
Younger is more at risk. Under 1 month, docs will do extreme care. Over 6 months, they don’t even care about fevers



Body’s after birth
You bleed a lot after birth

Excercise
Can start doing small stuff a few days after birth
Should be back to normal at 6 weeks


Post pardum depression
Use Edinburgh questionnaire
In last 7 days
I was able to laugh
Look forward to things
Blamed myself unnecessarily if stuff goes wrong
Anxious for no reason
Scared for no reason
Things have been getting on top of me
Missing sleep because unhappy
Sad
Want to harm myself



First year Part 2
Breast feeding!
Rich smart educated people breast feed more.
Breast feeding Early health affects
Randomized study with 17k pairs
Half were encouraged to breast feed
40% did va 7%
After a year, breast had fewer gut issues and less exema
Really good for pre-me
No fewer colds
Slightly fewer ear infections
SIDS. breast feeding has very little effect
No affect on obesity
No real affect on diabetes and cancer
IQ no good connection

Brest feeding effects on moms
You are less likely to get pregnant while breast feeding but it is NOT highly affective BC!
Not very effective on weight control. Study shows you only lose about a pound.
Good link to less breast cancer

Breast feeding is slightly better but not crazy necessary


How to best breast feed
It’s hard!
Skin to skin contact helps
Latching can be difficult. Need to get the whole nipple in it’s mouth.
Nipple shields are great
Lip and tongue tie can happen. Easy to fix but donesnt have a huge affect on latching.
Mastidus is an infection in the boob. Partial Causes are not emptying your milk store all the way.
Nipple confusion.
pacifiers have no effect!
Bottles have no effect either!
Milk supply
feed on demand might be better.
Collastrum is the first few days after birth
See graph to see when most people’s milk comes in. 25% take longer than 3 days.


Breastfeeding Diet
No restrictions! Except for high murcury food
Alcohol is fine!


Sleep position
Back to sleep
in own baby bed
Out of parents bed
Nothing else in crib
Nothing soft in bed
SIDS is cause of 90% of baby deaths
90% of SIDS were from stomach sleepers!
Side sleeping doesn’t matter
CO sleeping is a bit more dangerous but not a big deal if you don’t smoke and drink

Room sharing for first 4 months is good.
After 4 months it’s better to be in separate room.

Crib bumpers aren’t a big deal.


Baby sleep
Takes 2 naps a day at month 9
1 nap at month 16
New born sleep 16 hours
13 hours at age 1

Bays wake up between 6 and 8 am.
Getting to bed early is best.


Vaccines
DTAP lawsuits made it so it almost went away. Congress passed a bill stopping lawsuits.


Stay at home or stay at work
Make sure to figure out the costs. Consider how much take you make, not your total salary cost.

Better daycares are better for kids!

Has to be safe: no exposed wires, teacher knows about illnesses
Fun: toys, special play
Individualizations: kid per caretaker

Mom vs daycare
Mom care makes kids slightly smarter and better behaved.
Effect wears off by mid elementary school
Kids get more colds in daycare but that gives them slightly fewer colds in elementary

Parenting matters!



Sleep training
Cry it out
Very effective and very few side effects
No difference between attachment and sleep train at year 6!

Sleep training is more hit or miss during the day vs at night.
Graduated extinction is one of the best methods
Be in agreeance with each other about your strategy.
Be consistent


Beyond the boobs. Introducing solid foods.
5x more likely to be allergic to peanuts if not exposed
No real evidence for food introduction sequence
Most allergies come from 4 foods: milk, egg, peanut, tree nut
Baby led weening eans you just fed them what you’re eating
low evidence this is better though.
No increase in chocking
Getting kids to like all sorts of food is increased if you introduce more variety early. Not a slam dunk though.
Kids are most picky at 2!

It’s better to offer suggestions for food then force/negotiation
better: try this prune, it’s like a big raiser so you’ll probably like it.
Bad: eat this so you can have ice cream later. I’ll take your iPad away if you don’t eat.
Food refusal is increased if you offer chicken nuggets after a refusal
Keep offering a wide variety of food.
No threats or rewards to eat.

Fruit juice isn’t good. Water is best
No honey before month 6! All the way to year 1.
actually no great evidence for botulism.
Still a good idea to avoid
Babies don’t really ever need vitamin pills
except Vitamin D
Iron can have issues too



Development Stages
1% to 99% develop milestone
Sitting with our support 4-9 months
Standing with assistance 5-11 months
Crawling 5-13 mo (5% never crawl)
Walking with help 6-14 mo
Standing alone 7-16 mo
Walking alone 8-17 mo

Getting to a stage early has no impact on long term success. Ex. Early walkers aren’t better athletes as teens.


Screen time and educational shows
Sesame street does slightly improve “school readiness” in 3-5 year olds
TV correlated to low test scores and low health
We have good evidence that TV doesn’t teach anything

Vocab development is mostly linked with parents reading books. Not screen time of any educational product. No affect on infants.
Pre schooler can learn from TV
Curate content for older kids. Babies don’t matter

Does TV rot your brain?
Under age 3 has a correlation to lower test scores
After 3 has no affect
Natural experiment on Sesame Street introduction showed no causation
What about apps? NO IDEA!

Bottom line.
Infant can’t learn from TV
Preschool can
You should monitor what they are watching
Probably doesn’t matter too too much how much they watch

Language development
Boys are slower


Toilet training
Lots of methods. Not one killer technique
Up to 25% of kids will refuse to poop in a toilet
Eventually everyone poops in a toilet
Nighttime dryness aka Bed wetting
You have to wake up to peep
85% of kids wake up to use the bathroom by 5
If 6 or older, need to fix.
Happens about 10% of time

Behavior of toddlers
Best to walk away from a tantrum toddler
No magic bullets for behavior modification. Some good practices though.
Point of discipline is to raise good adults
Don’t get angry
Be consistent. If you do 123 magic, you have to actually punish at need if 3.
Don’t bluff.

123 magic is fantastic!!
Spanking and corporal punishment has a small negative affect in kids behavior

Number of kids
Quantity vs quality?
Not much of a difference is school attainment for each kid
Only kids don’t have personality differences like more or less social

Birth spacing
Not much of a difference
There is an 80% higher chance of having a pre me if you get pregnant less than 6 months after birth.
Best to wait at least a year before getting pregnant again.