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Real Influence: Persuade Without Pushing and Gain Without Giving In | [Mark Goulston, M.D., Dr. John Ullmen]

Real Influence: Persuade Without Pushing and Gain Without Giving In

People won't put up with being "sold" anymore. If they sense they are being pushed, their guard goes up - and even if they do comply, lingering resentment undermines the relationship...maybe forever. Yet, most books on influence still portray it as something you "do to" someone else to get your way. That out-of-date approach invites resistance or cynicism from those who recognize the techniques. Manipulative tactics might occasionally wear down a colleague's or client's resistance, but they fail to produce the mutual trust that sustains successful relationships.
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Publisher's Summary

People won't put up with being "sold" anymore. If they sense they are being pushed, their guard goes up - and even if they do comply, lingering resentment undermines the relationship...maybe forever. Yet, most books on influence still portray it as something you "do to" someone else to get your way. That out-of-date approach invites resistance or cynicism from those who recognize the techniques. Manipulative tactics might occasionally wear down a colleague's or client's resistance, but they fail to produce the mutual trust that sustains successful relationships. In short, they just won't work in our sophisticated, post-selling world.

In this groundbreaking audiobook, authors Mark Goulston and John Ullmen reveal a new model for authentic influence - the kind that creates a strong initial connection and survives long after agreement has been reached. Based on listening, genuine engagement, and commitment to win-win outcomes, Real Influence provides a powerful four-step method you can use to:

  • Examine your priorities
  • Learn about the key players and what they need
  • Earn their attention and motivate them to hear more
  • And add value with your questions and actions

Complete with examples of the steps in action and insights from real-world "power influencers", this one-of-a-kind guide shows that being straight with everyone means winning for all.

©2013 Mark Goulston M.D., Dr. John Ullmen (P)2012 Gildan Media LLC

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    Thomas Thousand Oaks, CA, United States 02-01-13
    Thomas Thousand Oaks, CA, United States 02-01-13 Member Since 2012
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Insightful Read"
    What made the experience of listening to Real Influence the most enjoyable?

    The examples were excellent and the content was a new spin on the old yarn that you get two ears and one mouth so you should use them in proportion.


    What other book might you compare Real Influence to and why?

    NA


    Which scene was your favorite?

    Can't pick one but like the platinum rule of treating others as they want to be treated, this book defines how to listen, partner, align, add value, and a host of other subjects we can use everyday.


    Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

    Yes


    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    m.a. Saint-Hubert, Quebec, Canada 05-29-14
    m.a. Saint-Hubert, Quebec, Canada 05-29-14 Member Since 2012

    Say something about yourself!

    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Good until the religious nonesense comes up"
    What could have made this a 4 or 5-star listening experience for you?

    You know that awful feeling you get when you are listening to a great book about influence with some pretty good advice that sudden goes south on you. Because the two last chapters turn out being bullshit stories about how an atheist turned into a god fearing person to become a better leader, and then another non-believer became changed and spiritual after being in contact with religious folks. Yeah, that just made a decent book garbage. Don't bother. You can get the same awesome content sans the religious garbage with Crucial Conversations.


    Has Real Influence turned you off from other books in this genre?

    No, there are other good books about leadership without religion in them.


    Any additional comments?

    Don't bother, there are a bunch of great books about Influence and Leadership that don't weave in god in there.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    David ALBUQUERQUE, NM, United States 03-25-13
    David ALBUQUERQUE, NM, United States 03-25-13 Member Since 2011
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    "More great info on the art of listening"
    Any additional comments?

    For those who are serious about making a connection and moving forward with other people.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
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  • Marcus
    SANDHURST, United Kingdom
    1/11/13
    Overall
    "Your Credibility Comes From The Questions You Ask"

    Mark Goulston and John Ullman have written a book that even an insensitive oaf like me can see is valuable because they clearly show you how to achieve real influence, the ability to persuade without pushing and gain without giving in.



    We teach our clients in Sandler rules such as "when under attack, fall back", "to get more, give more", "slow the sale down to speed the sale up", "your power resides in being vulnerably assertive", "people buy for their reasons not your reasons", "burn your bridges" etc. Real Influence gives you the means to develop concrete habits for living these and our other Sandler rules in your daily life.



    This book is a practical, instantly applicable must read for anyone serious about improving the quality and effectiveness of their relationships, personal and business. If you are a Sandler franchisee and train No Guts No Gain, "Real Influence" and their previous book, "Just Listen" (also available on Kindle and audio) will help you better understand the content of NGNG and deliver it to your clients much more effectively. Their explanation of how the brain works because of how it has evolved and the functions of the different parts of the brain & hardwired scripts helps TA fall into place instantly. Understanding the implications for training the Buyer-Seller dance, up front contracts, reversing, stroking, dummy curve, consistent referrals and the submarine are very exciting too.



    The audio version is delivered well and sinks in quickly because of the vivid, real life examples the authors describe. A five star read.



    Thanks Mark and John for a splendidly simple and practical guide to Real Influence. It has already helped me to sell more with less effort and improve what I am already good at through my training with Sandler, and for the most part I'm behaving better at home too!

    1 of 2 people found this review helpful
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