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Too Fat to Fish
- Narrated by: Artie Lange
- Length: 7 hrs and 56 mins
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Publisher's summary
A natural storyteller with a bottomless pit of material, Lange grew up in a close-knit, working-class Italian family in Union, New Jersey, as a maniacal Yankees fan who pursued the two things his father said he was cut out for: sports and comedy. Tragically, Artie Lange Sr. never saw the truth in that prediction. He became a quadriplegic in an accident when Artie was 18 and died soon after. But as with every trial in his life, from his drug addiction to his obesity, to his fights with his mother, Artie mines the humor, pathos, and humanity in these events and turns them into comedy classics.
True fans of the Stern Show will find Artie gold in these pages: hilarious tales that couldn't have happened to anyone else. There are stories from his days driving a Jersey cab, working as a longshoreman in Port Newark, and navigating the dark circuit of stand-up comedy. There are outrageous episodes from the frenzied heights of his coked-up days at MADtv, surprisingly moving stories from his childhood, and an account of his recent U.S.O. tour that is equally stirring and irreverent. But also in this volume are stories Artie's never told before, including some that he deemed too revealing for radio.
Wild, shocking, and drop-dead hilarious, Too Fat to Fish is Artie Lange giving everything he's got to give. And like a true pro, the man never disappoints.
Critic reviews
"A comedy treasure....One of the funniest guys there is....The pride of New Jersey." (Jimmy Kimmel)
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The New York Times best-selling biography of an American comedy legend. After three years of sobriety, Chris Farley's life was at its creative peak until a string of professional disappointments chased him back to drugs and alcohol. He fought hard against them, but it was a fight he would lose in December 1997. Farley's fans immediately drew parallels between his death and that of his idol, John Belushi. Without looking deeper, however, many failed to see that Farley was much more than just another Hollywood drug overdose. In this officially authorized oral history, Farley's friends and family remember his work and life.
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Incredibly sad....
- By Marie B on 04-12-15
By: Tom Farley, and others
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Digging Up Mother
- A Love Story
- By: Johnny Depp - foreword, Doug Stanhope
- Narrated by: Doug Stanhope and Friends
- Length: 12 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Doug Stanhope is one of the most critically acclaimed and stridently unrepentant comedians of his generation. What will surprise some is that he owes so much of his dark and sometimes uncomfortably honest sense of humor to his mother, Bonnie.
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Not my thing.
- By J. Harral on 01-27-18
By: Johnny Depp - foreword, and others
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Easy for You to Say
- By: John Melendez
- Narrated by: John Melendez
- Length: 6 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Easy For You To Say is "Stuttering" John Melendez's memoir of his childhood being bullied in school for his stutter; his years as an on-air personality with The Howard Stern Show; and his subsequent 10-year career as a writer and on-air announcer for Jay Leno's Tonight Show. It details his famously acerbic relationships with celebrities he interviewed/insulted (Raquel Welch once punched him in the face). In the audiobook, Howard Stern emerges as a surprisingly mean, stingy, and megalomaniacal boss - and Jay Leno as a seeming sufferer from OCD.
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Was expecting more
- By Amazon Customer on 10-25-18
By: John Melendez
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The Filthy Truth
- By: Andrew Dice Clay, David Ritz
- Narrated by: Bruce Rubenstein
- Length: 8 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In this unapologetic and uncensored autobiography, Andrew Dice Clay is ready to set the record straight. He was the eighties’ answer to Lenny Bruce, with material that stretched the boundaries of decency and good taste to their breaking point, and in turn became the most vilified stand-up comic of all time.
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The Diceman Returns!
- By Steven D. Sorrell on 03-26-15
By: Andrew Dice Clay, and others
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Loudmouth
- Tales (and Fantasies) of Sports, Sex, and Salvation from Behind the Microphone
- By: Craig Carton
- Narrated by: Craig Carton
- Length: 6 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In this debut, Carton invites the listener to join him as he recounts tales from his suburban youth, defends his long-held love affair with the New York Jets, reminisces about the shenanigans of some of the highest paid and most celebrated athletes playing today, and reflects on his work as one of radio's craftiest, most hilarious personalities ever to get behind the microphone.
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Fun but too much about early life
- By Anthony A. Ciaccio on 07-13-13
By: Craig Carton
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Dirty Daddy
- The Chronicles of a Family Man Turned Filthy Comedian
- By: Bob Saget
- Narrated by: Bob Saget
- Length: 6 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Millions of viewers know and love Bob Saget from his role as the sweetly neurotic father on the smash hit Full House, and as the charming wisecracking host of America's Funniest Home Videos. And then there are the legions of fans who can't get enough of his scatological, out-of-his-mind stand-up routines, comedy specials, and outrageously profane performances in such shows as HBO's Entourage and the hit documentary The Aristocrats.
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Meh to the 2nd Power
- By Hilary on 06-30-14
By: Bob Saget
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Bare Bones
- I'm Not Lonely If You're Reading This Book
- By: Bobby Bones
- Narrated by: Bobby Bones
- Length: 6 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Growing up poor in Mountain Pine, Arkansas, with a young, addicted mom, Bobby Estell fell in love with country music. Abandoned by his father at the age of five, Bobby saw the radio as his way out - a dream that came true in college when he went on air at the Henderson State University campus station broadcasting as Bobby Bones while simultaneously starting The Bobby Bones Show at 105.9 KLAZ.
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A look inside the narcissist life of Bobby Bones.
- By Selena on 05-20-16
By: Bobby Bones
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The Improv
- An Oral History of the Comedy Club That Revolutionized Stand-Up
- By: Budd Friedman, Tripp Whetsell, Jay Leno - foreword
- Narrated by: Johnny Heller
- Length: 10 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In 1963, 30-year-old Friedman - who had recently quit his job as a Boston advertising executive and returned to his hometown of New York to become a theatrical producer - opened a coffee house for Broadway performers called the Improvisation. His goal? Simply to make a living, and if all went according to plan, to also make enough professional contacts to be able to mount his first Broadway show within a year's time. Later shortened to the Improv, its first West 44th Street location was in a seedy section of Manhattan's Hell's Kitchen.
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Shockingly tone deaf
- By JenniferW on 06-28-23
By: Budd Friedman, and others
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Coreyography
- By: Corey Feldman
- Narrated by: Corey Feldman
- Length: 8 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In this brave and moving memoir, Corey Feldman is revealing the truth about what his life was like behind the scenes: His is a past that included physical, drug, and sexual abuse, a dysfunctional family from which he was emancipated at age fifteen, three high-profile arrests for drug possession, a nine-month stint in rehab, and a long, slow crawl back to the top of the box office.
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Didn't like the Two Coreys, but liked this.
- By ricketsj on 04-29-14
By: Corey Feldman
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You're Better than Me
- A Memoir
- By: Bonnie McFarlane
- Narrated by: Bonnie McFarlane, Alexander Cendese
- Length: 7 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In the spirit of Mindy Kaling, Kelly Oxford, and Sarah Silverman, a compulsively listenable and outrageously funny memoir of growing up as a fish out of water, finding your voice, and embracing your inner crazy person from popular actress, writer, and comedian Bonnie McFarlane.
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Sandy!!! She wrote a book...it's crazy, a book!!!
- By Jonathan Placek on 03-02-16
By: Bonnie McFarlane
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Dynomite!
- Good Times, Bad Times…Our Times - A Memoir
- By: Jimmie Walker, Sal Manna
- Narrated by: Jimmie Walker
- Length: 9 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
>Born into the violence of South Bronx ghetto life, the comic pioneer of TV’s Good Times fame offers a hilarious and politically charged review of his career as one of television’s first hugely successful Black stars. From opening for the Black Panthers and getting his first Tonight Show spot to becoming the first “Black” TV sitcom star, having comedians David Letterman and Jay Leno writing jokes for him, recording number-one comedy albums, and opening for rock n’ roll bands in 50,000 seat stadiums, Walker’s career hit all the highs.
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An transparent story of a socially but funny American icon.
- By John Lucasey on 05-08-21
By: Jimmie Walker, and others
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The Todd Glass Situation
- A Bunch of Lies about My Personal Life and a Bunch of True Stories about My 30-Year Career in Standup Comedy
- By: Todd Glass, Jonathan Grotenstein
- Narrated by: Oliver Wyman
- Length: 6 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Growing up in a Philadelphia suburb in the 1970s was an easy life. Well, easy as long as you didn't have dyslexia or ADD, or were a Jew. And once you added gay into the mix, life became more difficult. So Todd Glass decided to hide the gay part, no matter how comic, tragic, or comically tragic the results. Now, Todd has written an open, honest, and hilarious memoir in an effort to help everyone - young and old, gay and straight - breathe a little more freely.
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Worth It
- By Heather on 11-17-14
By: Todd Glass, and others
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Pain Killer
- A Memoir of Big League Addiction
- By: Brantt Myhres, Michael Landsberg - foreword
- Narrated by: Brantt Myhres, Michael Landsberg
- Length: 10 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Brantt Myhres wasn't around for the birth of his daughter. Myhres had played for seven different NHL teams, and had made millions. But he'd been suspended four times, all for drug use, and he had partied his way out of the league. This is his story, in his own words, of how he fought his way out of minor hockey into the big league, but never left behind the ghosts of a bleak and troubled childhood.
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I love hockey.
- By Brew2go on 06-14-21
By: Brantt Myhres, and others
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American on Purpose
- The Improbable Adventures of an Unlikely Patriot
- By: Craig Ferguson
- Narrated by: Craig Ferguson
- Length: 7 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In American on Purpose, Craig Ferguson delivers a moving and achingly funny memoir of living the American dream as he journeys from the mean streets of Glasgow, Scotland, to the comedic promised land of Hollywood. Along the way, he stumbles through several attempts to make his mark - as a punk rock musician, a construction worker, a bouncer, and, tragically, a modern dancer.
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Unabashedly Honest
- By Diane on 12-09-09
By: Craig Ferguson
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Robert Altman
- The Oral Biography
- By: Mitchell Zuckoff
- Narrated by: Robert Altman, Warren Beatty, Cher, and others
- Length: 18 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Robert Altman - visionary director, hard-partying hedonist, eccentric family man, Hollywood legend - comes roaring to life in this rollicking cinematic biography, told in a chorus of voices that can only be called Altmanesque.
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Enthralling!
- By Wise & Careful Shopper on 10-17-10
By: Mitchell Zuckoff
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Based on a True Story
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When Norm Macdonald, one of the greatest stand-up comics of all time, was approached to write a celebrity memoir, he flatly refused, calling the genre “one step below instruction manuals.” Norm then promptly took a two-year hiatus from stand-up comedy to live on a farm in northern Canada. When he emerged he had under his arm a manuscript, a genre-smashing book about comedy, tragedy, love, loss, war, and redemption. When asked if this was the celebrity memoir, Norm replied, “Call it anything you damn like.”
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Waste of time, and I returned it...
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One of pop culture’s great enduring unsung heroes: Gary Dell’Abate, Howard Stern Show producer, miracle worker, professional good sport, and servant to the King of All Media, for the first time tells the story of his early years and reveals how his chaotic childhood and early obsessions prepared him for life at the center of the greatest show on Earth. Baba Booey! Baba Booey! It was a slip of the tongue - that unfortunately was heard by a few million listeners - but in that split second a nickname, a persona, a rallying cry, and a phenomenon was born.
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Today, Anthony Cumia is the co-host of the wildly popular “Anthony Cumia Show,” which live-streams to a huge following of paid subscribers; however, Anthony is most well-known from the legendary, nationally syndicated “Opie and Anthony Show.” Permanently Suspended is an all-access pass to the controversial mayhem that ensued on-and-off the air. A must-listen for all diehard O&A fans, Permanently Suspended finally answers the questions that everyone has been waiting for.
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A Polaroid Guy in a Snapchat World
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Free on Spotify
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Happy Endings
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brilliant and tragic
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Leon Russell
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Leon Russell is an icon, but somehow is still an underappreciated artist. He is spoken of in tones reserved not just for the most talented musicians, but also for the most complex and fascinating. His career is like a roadmap of music history, often intersecting with rock royalty like Bob Dylan, the Stones, and the Beatles.
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A dream come true for Leon Russell fans!!
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Yearbook
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Hi! I’m Seth! I was asked to describe my audiobook, Yearbook for websites and shit like that, so...here it goes!!! Yearbook is a collection of true stories that I desperately hope are just funny at worst, and life-changingly amazing at best. (I understand that it’s likely the former, which is a fancy “book” way of saying “the first one.”) I talk about my grandparents, doing stand-up comedy as a teenager, bar mitzvahs, and Jewish summer camp, and tell way more stories about doing drugs than my mother would like.
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Good until it turned political
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Whatever You Say I Am
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- By cosand on 09-20-11
By: Anthony Bozza
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No Encore for the Donkey
- By: Doug Stanhope
- Narrated by: Doug Stanhope
- Length: 6 hrs and 20 mins
- Original Recording
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Misanthrope. Iconoclast. Apostate. Drunk. Many words have been used to describe Doug Stanhope, but rarely has “hopeful” been one of them. However, heading into 2016, Stanhope peered through the apocalyptic fog and saw a forecast that was more rainbows than acid rain: His first book was set for release, his new stand-up special was in the can, and he was about to film a television pilot with his friend and confidant Johnny Depp. The only thing that could stop Doug was himself, and that’s exactly what he did.
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Wow.
- By Jennifer Carr on 08-20-20
By: Doug Stanhope
What listeners say about Too Fat to Fish
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall
- John
- 03-18-09
great book, horrid readers
sadly, i cannot give this audible book the same rating i would give the written book. the book itself is funny, sad and eye opening. when the audible version starts, Artie Lange begins as the voice of the book. However, other readers take over and bring this book to an end for me. Please redo the audible with one reader who can actualy read.
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10 people found this helpful
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Overall
- J. Johnson
- 02-16-09
Only for big Stern show fans
I bought this because of being a fan of the Howard Stern show and it was the only reason I was able to finish it. The book reads like Artie talks which to some might be a good thing but I didn't think so. Second, Artie quits reading the book himself not even halfway through and has other people do it for him. This wouldn't be so bad except he somehow thought it would be funny to have Bob Levy read part of the book when it's a known fact Bob can barely read.
If you're a fan of the show I'd still recommend buying this, but if you're not then I'd pass on this one.
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6 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Kevin
- 11-24-08
Funny - but no forward by Howard
Artie spoke a lot on the air about how touched he was by Howard's forward to his book. It would have been nice if the powers that be had included the forward in the audiobook - unfortunately, the forward is not included.
Decent book - but I still would love to read Howard's words. Guess I'll have to pick up the dead tree edition.
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5 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Richard
- 01-07-09
Too funny to not buy
If you are from the the Tri-State you will LOVE this book.If you are a fan of the Stern show, you will love this book. If you want to hear someone talk passionately about their life, then this is one of the most engrossing books you are ever likely to read. Listening to Artie speak frankly about his life, his demons, his love(s) and his losses will bring tears to your eyes. Tears of joy and tears of sadness are never far apart.
This book only left me wanting for more.
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4 people found this helpful
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Overall
- R. Conley
- 02-17-09
Save your credits
I am about through with this and haven't laughed once. Not shocking, not funny, and impossible to have any empathy for the man. I had not heard of him or seen any of his movies or comedy and I surely won't look for them now. I doubt I'll finish it. A waste of a credit.
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3 people found this helpful
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Overall
- S M
- 11-18-08
In all honesty
I'm a huge fan of Artie and the whole show and if you are too this book won't disappoint. I was actually surprised though that of all the talent that read, Bob Levy was one of the best while Artie himself sounded a bit flat and lacked the natural inflection and intonation I'm use to from hearing his stories told on the radio. It's a great book though, especially if you are a fan of the show.
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3 people found this helpful
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- lisa
- 07-25-12
Fantastic Listen
Where does Too Fat to Fish rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?
This absolutely ranks waaaaay at the top of the autobiographies I've listened too. Artie is so honest and has really lived life. He pulls no punches, doesn't sugar coat it and he is truthful about himself which most people aren't. This story is hilarious, sad, poignant... absolutely worth your time!
What was one of the most memorable moments of Too Fat to Fish?
My favorite story was about Artie and his Dad going to the world series. Absolutely made me cry and gives me goosebumps now remembering it.
Would you listen to another book narrated by Artie Lange?
Absolutely... and he should have read the entire thing!!!!
Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?
I DID listen to this all in one sitting.
Any additional comments?
I am not a howard stern fan- don't even listen to his show... so that is not why I got this book. Artie Lang is a talented man.
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2 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Edward
- 11-17-08
Two Hands on the Wheel
If you, like me, tend to listen to your audiobooks on the road, beware. Keep two hands on the wheel. As you will need all the help you can get when hysteria takes over.
A brilliant several hours is delivered by a talent too large to miss. Outburst laughter, heartfelt sadness, anger, and stark moments of self loathing bring this marvelous journey to life.
As a long time AudibleListener, whose style is leave the writing to the professionals, I will not bore you with why the quintet of stars?
All I pray is Artie finds time for more . . . and shelves any notion his contribution is all there is - for a shame it would be if this were his way of scripting the longest suicide note on record.
Do yourself a favor, and make the download button your next key stroke. Fire!
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2 people found this helpful
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- Frank
- 11-14-08
we love arty!
the jersey devil strikes again. great book keep it up.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Darth Vinnie
- 08-11-22
Wow…tough read
Heart wrenching to listen too, like being stuck on the tracks and seeing the train coming. It’s real, it’s emotion, and very sad at times. But I respect Artie for telling the story…with the help of Bababooie, Florientine and Rev Bob
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1 person found this helpful