In a time when much of the country sees red whenever the subject of gay marriage comes up, Dan Savage—outspoken author of the column Savage Love—makes it personal.
Dan Savage’s mother wants him to get married. His boyfriend, Terry, says “no thanks” because he doesn’t want to act like a straight person. Their six-year-old son, D.J., says his two dads aren’t “allowed” to get married but that he’d like to come to the reception and eat cake. Throw into the mix Dan’s straight siblings, whose varied choices form a microcosm of how Americans are approaching marriage these days, and you get a rollicking family memoir that will have everyone—gay or straight, right or left, single or married—howling with laughter and rethinking their notions of marriage and all it entails.
©2005 Dan Savage (P)2011 Blackstone Audio, Inc.
“The strongest argument here, which [Savage] brilliantly plays down, is that family means everything to these people: married, not married, blended, gay, straight, whatever.” (Washington Post)
A very funny, honest accounting of a little slice of Dan Savage's life. I enjoyed it a lot, but missed Dan's characteristic voice. I know he's busy these days, but I would have liked to have him read this himself.
I enjoyed the book as I have all of Dan's books, but this is the only one I heard with a different narrator. The characters (Dan's family members) come across much differently in his voice.
Whether you're gay or straight (or somewhere in between) this book is a good read for an objective look at what it means to be married from someone who isn't allowed.
Book nerd for life!
I bought this audiobook back in 2012 but just now listened to it. I had no idea what to expect, and I think it actually worked out better that way. Dan Savage wrote about his partner Terry, his son DJ, his loving family, and how marriage does and doesn't work for some couples. His commentary was hilarious, and his conversations with others (mainly his family members) about marriage made great points, for both, straight and same-sex couples. The narrator, Paul Michael Garcia, made the audiobook even more enjoyable. I'm glad I got it and glad I read it. Recommended for anyone who isn't too serious, as I can see some of Dan's writing rubbing the far right the wrong way (especially DJ's opinion of George W. Bush haha)
I like Dan Savage, so I enjoyed the book and found it entertaining. I could see that some might find it a bit preachy. My main gripe is that Dan didn't read the book himself. The narrator did a fine job, but didn't sound anything like Dan which was just strange to listen to.
This memoir was at times very entertaining, but too often lapsed into repetitive lecturing. I am straight, but I wouldn't have chosen this book if I disagreed with gay marriage. So on a number of occasions I felt like protesting, "you're preaching to the choir here!" But, all in all, Savage is an engaging writer and storyteller.
I've enjoyed this author's work for many years - so much that I dutifully credit him with important contributions to many of my own best life choices (my younger boyfriend - now husband; our daughter; etc). This is the first of his books that I've read, and it was new to hear that familiar authorial voice - the humor, the fantastic logic, the strong undercurrent of no bullshit compassion - in a longer narrative. I thoroughly enjoyed the book. I'm now rightly scared of and in love with his late mother, I looked up Terry's picture - just wow - and I love the Chinese Room at the Smith Tower even more.
Though I enjoy the author's own spoken performances very much, I was impressed by the performer here and very much enjoyed his reading.
This is much more a sequence of connected essays than a novel or story, centred around Dan Savages and his male partner Terry's plans for a 10 years together celebration.
There were a few chapters in the middle where the serious overtook the fun and non US readers may find the references to various political names a little glazing, but for the most part there is a great deal of humour and a lot of insight into being gay in the US and into getting married.
At the time of writing (2004) the US legislature at least, in many, perhaps most of its states regarded homosexuals as second class citizens, and that is probably being generous. I don't know how much has changed there. This is one of those books that would really benefit from a few minutes of appendix at the end with an "update" from the author. Perhaps Audible could note that this sort of "add-on" could be a much more realistic feature in the online downloadable world they trade in.
Well worth the read. If you are in Western Europe, it will certainly leave you wondering why the US thinks of itself as the land of the free, at least for some 10% of if citizens!
"A great insight into gay parenting!"
This is a book of three parts. The first is a bit dull, outlining the circumstances of Savage's life leading up to the 'big question' after ten years with his partner: Should we marry? The vignettes about Savage's family aren't hugely interesting, but they're valuable for context. The middle section is Savage talking about the 'gay marriage debate' in the US, and is interesting as it shows the fire in his argument, and the final section - the most entertaining - tells us 'what happened next'. All in all, worth reading.
I'm a huge Dan Savage fan anyway, but I really loved this book. Something to make you think and to make you laugh.
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