Lots of Candles, Plenty of Cake

A Memoir of a Woman's Life

By: Anna Quindlen

Narrated by: Anna Quindlen

Length: 7 hrs and 7 mins

Publisher's summary

In this irresistible memoir, the New York Times best-selling author and winner of the Pulitzer Prize Anna Quindlen writes about looking back and ahead - and celebrating it all - as she considers marriage, girlfriends, our mothers, faith, loss, all the stuff in our closets, and more.

As she did in her beloved New York Times columns, and in A Short Guide to a Happy Life, Quindlen says for us here what we may wish we could have said ourselves. Using her past, present, and future to explore what matters most to women at different ages, Quindlen talks about:

Marriage: “A safety net of small white lies can be the bedrock of a successful marriage. You wouldn’t believe how cheaply I can do a kitchen renovation.”

Girlfriends: “Ask any woman how she makes it through the day, and she may mention her calendar, her to-do lists, her babysitter. But if you push her on how she really makes it through her day, she will mention her girlfriends. Sometimes I will see a photo of an actress in an unflattering dress or a blouse too young for her or with a heavy-handed makeup job, and I mutter, ‘She must not have any girlfriends.’”

Stuff: “Here’s what it comes down to, really: there is now so much stuff in my head, so many years, so many memories, that it’s taken the place of primacy away from the things in the bedrooms, on the porch. My doctor says that, contrary to conventional wisdom, she doesn’t believe our memories flag because of a drop in estrogen but because of how crowded it is in the drawers of our minds. Between the stuff at work and the stuff at home, the appointments and the news and the gossip and the rest, the past and the present and the plans for the future, the filing cabinets in our heads are not only full, they’re overflowing.”

Our bodies: “I’ve finally recognized my body for what it is: a personality-delivery system, designed expressly to carry my character from place to place, now and in the years to come. It’s like a car, and while I like a red convertible or even a Bentley as well as the next person, what I really need are four tires and an engine.”

Parenting: “Being a parent is not transactional. We do not get what we give. It is the ultimate pay-it-forward endeavor: We are good parents not so they will be loving enough to stay with us but so they will be strong enough to leave us.”

From childhood memories to manic motherhood to middle age, Quindlen uses the events of her own life to illuminate our own. Along with the downsides of age, she says, can come wisdom, a perspective on life that makes it satisfying and even joyful. Candid, funny, moving, Lots of Candles, Plenty of Cake is filled with the sharp insights and revealing observations that have long confirmed Quindlen’s status as America’s laureate of real life.

©2012 Anna Quindlen (P)2012 Random House

Critic reviews

“A reporter by training, a storyteller at heart, [Quindlen’s] writing is personal, humorous, and thought-provoking.” ( Seattle Post-Intelligencer)

“Quindlen is an astonishingly graceful writer.” ( San Francisco Examiner)

“Thank goodness for Anna Quindlen. [She] is smart. And compassionate. And witty. And wise.” ( Detroit Free-Press)

Lots of Laughs, Plenty of Wisdom

A jewel of a book. She could be my best friend or my sister who died of cancer a few years ago, she's someone who feels intensely and shares brilliantly. She makes growing older, growing up a lot easier to contemplate. She suggests making mistakes are worth making. She takes life seriously yet doesn't take herself seriously. I just wish she kept on talking to me. I miss her already. I'd recommend this book to anyone especially those with full lives full of children, relationships, work, and fears about getting older. I hope she writes another memoir when she's eighty.

It is like listening to an old friend

Would you listen to Lots of Candles, Plenty of Cake again? Why?

I would listen to it again. The wisdom and wit from Anna Quindlen can be enjoyed and mused over many times!

What did you like best about this story?

The personal anecdotes were delightful and made the lessons she learned easy to assimilate.

What does Anna Quindlen bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?

Somehow, hearing it in her own voice made it seem like a conversation with an old friend and brought her stories to life.

Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?

All of the stories about her husband and their marriage really resonated with me.

Any additional comments?

I fully enjoyed this book and it gave me pause to remember and celebrate my own relationships with family and friends.

Could Have Been Better

Overall a little depressing. Once you reach a certain age, things happen, we all know this. I would have enjoyed a lighter spin on things, maybe a little more upbeat and the big life events that most of us go through. I can do drab all by myself.

A must read for baby boomers

Would you listen to Lots of Candles, Plenty of Cake again? Why?

Yes. I am in my mid fifties and starting to look at life from a diferent perspective. This book is a thought provoking look at mid life from a woman with a bright and positive outlook.

What did you like best about this story?

It resonated with where I am in my life right now. It is as if I could have written it myself.

Have you listened to any of Anna Quindlen’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

This is my first Anna Quindlan audio book although I have read all her others. She is my favorite author of all time. I don't think this book could have been performed by anyone but her. I really liked hearing it in her voice.

Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

No, because I didn't want it to end!

Any additional comments?

I have recommended it to all my friends.

Unique

I loved Lots of Candles, Plenty of Cake by Anna Quindlen! While reading her book, she made me imagine and feel her unique way of writing. She is a very optimist person and made me laugh many times throughout her book! This was my first book of hers, I know I will read more of hers.

Favorite Book of the Year

This woman knows how to write. I travel all over working with teachers and students on writing. I only wish that Anna Quindlen could visit each and everyone of their classrooms. I have read a number of memoirs and a number of them fall flat. Quindlen's voice, sentence fluency, and word choice create an engaging piece of work that I did not want to end. She is funny, poignant, and boy does she hit the nail right on the head in relationship to women and where they are in life. I found myself laughing out loud. The best part is that she narrates this piece herself and she absolutely shines.

She is the type of writer who you want to be your next door neighbor and chat over coffee or even better a glass of wine. I have recommended this book to everyone I know and am suggesting it for all three of my book clubs. She is absolutely brilliant in every way. This is truly my favorite book of the year!

How she wrote those feelings so hard to express

I love that she herself read w/ all that truthfulness & honesty, I cried at the very end of her description of what her older self would perhaps become, lovely read , thanks Anna❤️

Worth a listen!

Bestselling author and Pulitzer Prize winner Anna Quindlen now takes a realistic look at her 60th year in this memoir. Within, she talks of the past (growing up, parents, boys, dating, marriage, children..), the present (the importance of friends, not getting so worked up anymore, faith, loss) and the future (decluttering life, enjoying the moments...)

Anna talks to you in her memoir like she is talking to a friend hashing over the good, the bad, and the ugly while sitting in a sunny chair on her porch sitting ice-cold tea and the sampling of the occasional short bread.

I have not read a lot of Anna Quindlen. However, I know Anna Quindlen can write, and I know her name as an author upon hearing it.

While I am no where hear the 60th birthday mark, I was still intrigued by a life memoir by a woman who is known for writing about realistic life opportunities in ways that make you think and care. I knew that writing a non fiction for Anna, would be an honest, even if it was brutally so, look at the life lessons she has carried.

I for one felt I too would get something out of listening to this book.

I used to think that surrounding myself with trusting girlfriends was just my own personal way of dealing with so much loss in my life. I like, and need "Go To Girls". Listening to Anna, I am realizing that my need to hang out with my friends is not a unique thing, but really - a girl thing. As Anna points out, as we get older our girlfriends become all the more important to talk about everything, and to talk about nothing. I like that.

From dating to marrying to children of our own, Anna Quindlen covers all the topics with a matter of fact and confident tone. I enjoyed listening to her life lessons, smiling and laughing at times.

All in all, this book is not just for nearing or over that 60 years old mark. It is a read for any woman who feels they have lived much, but have more left to do.

Vintage Quindlen

Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

Having read several of Anna Quindlen's other non-fiction works, I was accustomed to her literary voice and tone of writing, her turn of phrase and her ability to bridge the common experience. I'm not married and dont have kids, but we are the same age, share much the same background and pretty much the same politics, so reading/listening to her is always a good read. I'd recommend this to anyone of like mind or experiences.

What about Anna Quindlen’s performance did you like?

Love her turn of phrase.

Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

No. More like sisters of the same experience.

This was my first Anna Quindlen book. WOW!

This book is so full of incredible observations and insight about life from a "boomer" woman's perspective! I laughed out loud...I shed tears...I saw some new light. Anna writes so many quotable passages...I had to get the Kindle version as well to re-enjoy the highlights!