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Let's Pretend This Never Happened (A Mostly True Memoir) | [Jenny Lawson]

Let's Pretend This Never Happened (A Mostly True Memoir)

For fans of Tina Fey and David Sedaris - Internet star Jenny Lawson, aka The Bloggess, makes her literary debut. Jenny Lawson realized that the most mortifying moments of our lives - the ones we'd like to pretend never happened - are in fact the ones that define us. In Let's Pretend This Never Happened, Lawson takes readers on a hilarious journey recalling her bizarre upbringing in rural Texas, her devastatingly awkward high school years, and her relationship with her long-suffering husband, Victor.
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Publisher's Summary

Audie Award Nominee, Humor, 2013

For fans of Tina Fey and David Sedaris - Internet star Jenny Lawson, aka The Bloggess, makes her literary debut.

Jenny Lawson realized that the most mortifying moments of our lives - the ones we'd like to pretend never happened - are in fact the ones that define us. In Let's Pretend This Never Happened, Lawson takes listeners on a hilarious journey recalling her bizarre upbringing in rural Texas, her devastatingly awkward high school years, and her relationship with her long-suffering husband, Victor.

Chapters include: "Stanley the Magical, Talking Squirrel", "A Series of Angry Post-It Notes to My Husband", "My Vagina Is Fine. Thanks for Asking", and "And Then I Snuck a Dead Cuban Alligator on an Airplane".

©2012 Jenny Lawson (P)2012 Penguin

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

4.0 (2292 )
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  •  
    Kristy 06-06-13
    Kristy 06-06-13
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Author/narrator is annoying and self absorbed"

    The events that Lawson writes about are indeed funny, but the way that she writes and narrates is chatty and annoying. If her running commentry was edited out it might be ok.

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Kathy 06-04-13
    Kathy 06-04-13

    I really like thrillers. My favorite type of movie or book is one that has a unique perspective instead of a different version of the same story repeated by many different writers throughout the years. Many books are fine for a one-time listen, but to find one that's good enough to listen to again and again is a rare find indeed!!

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    "Let's Pretend I Never Wasted My Time"

    'The sample doesn't sound too bad,' I naively told myself as I was searching for books to buy. I was feeling the pressure of having to use up quite a few credits I'd collected before I reached the limit and possibly losing some. Not being a big fan of autobiographies, but thinking this (supposedly) humorous one would (probably) be okay to try, keeping in mind the sample I'd just heard and the reviews I'd just read, I put it in my cart, hit the right buttons and this audiobook was now mine. So were a few others. I now had breathing room regarding my credits and I could take my time to enjoy my books.

    Some I did enjoy. Some were wonderful!!

    This was neither enjoyable nor wonderful.

    The whacky, funny part of it being "a mostly true memoir" turned out to be whacky in a bad way and not funny at all. It wasn't just the words I was hearing coming out of my laptop that made me realize I'd made a huge mistake in purchasing this book. It was the scratchy, crackling, all-too-soon-becoming-irritating voice that made me quit listening before I got even close to the end. I simply couldn't bear it any longer.

    I realize people cannot help the voice with which they were either born or which has seen better days for various reasons. However, if you have written a book and want to be the one to read it aloud to others, it is my opinion you should definitely listen to how your voice sounds after you've recorded several samples. If, after hearing several sample readings of how your voice sounds reading those precious words you spent months or years working on until they were just right, and you find yourself irritated even the slightest bit, it is my opinion you should find a professional narrator and thus ensure the listening audience will be pleased, write great reviews and tell everyone they know to buy your audiobook.

    Do not buy this audiobook.

    5 of 6 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Karen United States 02-02-13
    Karen United States 02-02-13 Member Since 2012
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    "Every "ing" is pronounced "ink""
    What would have made Let's Pretend This Never Happened (A Mostly True Memoir) better?

    Different narrator would have made this better. Sorry Jenny, I just can't get past your saying "ink" instead of "ing" for all words ending in "ing" and boy, there were a lot of those words. I think in this case I would have preferred reading the actual book. Or sayink in your language, I would have preferred readink the actual book.


    Has Let's Pretend This Never Happened (A Mostly True Memoir) turned you off from other books in this genre?

    Nope.


    How did the narrator detract from the book?

    Yep.


    What reaction did this book spark in you? Anger, sadness, disappointment?

    Dissapointink narratink


    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Angela 11-09-13
    Angela 11-09-13
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Annoying"
    What didn’t you like about Jenny Lawson’s performance?

    I've always found The Blogess's writing very funny, but a lot of that is because she says off-handed, unexpected things that I read as deadpan. Hearing her read it, however, Jenny Lawson is extremely self-aware of the "funny" moments, and says them in a tone like, "HEY GUYS, THIS PART IS FUNNY," which makes it totally unfunny and just ... irritating.


    Any additional comments?

    This is not a memoir so much as a collection of stories that the writer thinks are funny. In the end, I didn't feel like I learned anything, it just felt like a lot of cheap laughs sewn together. The only chapter I really liked was the one where she talked about her miscarriages because it was the only one that felt real and human, like there was a point behind the jokes and not just a bunch of funny or awkward moments. Also, she's a good writer, but the tangents drove the me crazy. Listening to this book was like listening to your most ADD friend try to tell stories, but by the middle of the story you've totally forgotten what you were talking about because you've landed somewhere else entirely. That style is funny at first, and it lends itself well to conversational-toned writing in general and blogging in particular, but when an entire book is like that, and especially when you're listening to it rather than reading it, it's extremely annoying.

    4 of 5 people found this review helpful
  •  
    James Batavia, NY, United States 04-23-12
    James Batavia, NY, United States 04-23-12
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    "I didn't even get through it, and i read her blog"
    Would you try another book from Jenny Lawson and/or Jenny Lawson?

    Maybe, I thought that it was WAY too much rambling and the stories just kept going and going and going. She reads very fast so you really have to pay attention to what's she's saying.


    Has Let's Pretend This Never Happened (A Mostly True Memoir) turned you off from other books in this genre?

    No.


    Would you be willing to try another one of Jenny Lawson’s performances?

    Probably not. I think she reads way to fast.


    What reaction did this book spark in you? Anger, sadness, disappointment?

    Disappointment for sure. Her blog is so funny. And frustration. All of the stories just keep dragging and she never gets to the point.


    6 of 8 people found this review helpful
  •  
    APRIL SHADY SPRING, WV, United States 06-10-14
    APRIL SHADY SPRING, WV, United States 06-10-14
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    "I would like to stab myself in the ear."
    This book wasn’t for you, but who do you think might enjoy it more?

    Drug users. People with OCD or ADD


    What could Jenny Lawson have done to make this a more enjoyable book for you?

    Let some else read it. Get singing lessons if you are determined to SING the chapter title. Stop rambling. ...allow your editor remove 60% of this book.


    Would you be willing to try another one of Jenny Lawson’s performances?

    Not a chance.


    What character would you cut from Let's Pretend This Never Happened (A Mostly True Memoir)?

    Let's remove Jenny


    Any additional comments?

    Yuck

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Nanner Georgia 06-08-14
    Nanner Georgia 06-08-14 Member Since 2013

    Loving listening!!!

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    "Annoying and Vapid"
    What disappointed you about Let's Pretend This Never Happened (A Mostly True Memoir)?

    I was told about this book by a friend, and I expected to love it; I may be better to read it in print, as I found the author to be so annoying, that I only lasted about five minutes. Her story is conversational and rambling; As the reader, I felt like I was on the phone with a self-indulgent, bitchy teenager.


    What reaction did this book spark in you? Anger, sadness, disappointment?

    Disappointment


    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Ebony Henderson 04-29-14 Member Since 2014
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    "OMG this is the worst book I've ever read!!!"
    What would have made Let's Pretend This Never Happened (A Mostly True Memoir) better?

    Not writing this crap at all would have been best.


    Would you ever listen to anything by Jenny Lawson again?

    NO NEVER!!!


    What didn’t you like about Jenny Lawson’s performance?

    Everything...i just didn't think it was funny or entertaining at all.


    You didn’t love this book... but did it have any redeeming qualities?

    No.


    Any additional comments?

    Don't waste your time or money.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Krista Garnet Valley, PA, United States 03-05-14
    Krista Garnet Valley, PA, United States 03-05-14 Member Since 2011
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    "DO NOT WASTE YOUR MONEY! THIS IS HORRIBLE!"

    I have listened to dozens of books and have never written a review. I'm just not the reviewing type. However, I am compelled to write now because this BY FAR the WORST book I have ever listened to!! If there was a way to demand my money back from Audible, I would be doing that right now. The author's voice is annoying and the stories that she tells range from stupid to ridiculous. They aren't even kind of entertaining. If what she is saying is even close to the truth, the author should be locked up and submitted to intensive therapy immediately. The fact that she is a mother and is a lunatic is frightening, not funny. And the fact that she can't end most stories without a PS and a PPS and a PPPS and a PPPPS and that even after the 6th PPPPPPS the ending is completely moronic and uninteresting makes the listening brutal. If you are looking for a biography or a memoir there are so many better options. This is pure stupidity. Don't waste your time.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Laura SCOTTSDALE, AZ, United States 01-30-14
    Laura SCOTTSDALE, AZ, United States 01-30-14 Member Since 2015
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Recommended as comparable to Sedaris, Not So!"

    Very juvenile and much less sophisticated or intelligent than any of David Sadaris book, as it was compared to. Maybe a latent Valley Girl teen might appreciate it. Sorry

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
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