I Am Not Myself These Days

A Memoir

By: Josh Kilmer-Purcell

Narrated by: Johnny Heller

I Am Not Myself These Days follows a glittering journey through Manhattan's dark underbelly---a shocking and surreal world where alter egos reign and subsist (barely) on dark wit and chemicals...a tragic romantic comedy where one begins by rooting for the survival of the relationship and ends by hoping someone simply survives. Kilmer-Purcell is a terrifically gifted new literary voice who straddles the divide between absurdity and normalcy, and stitches them together with surprising humor and lonely poignancy. As Booklist raved, I Am Not Myself These Days is "as tart and funny as a Noel Coward play, for Kilmer-Purcell is especially good at dialogue, and, as in Coward's best plays, under the comedy lies the sad truth that even at our best, we are all weak, fallible fools. Again and again in this rich, adventure-filled book, Kilmer-Purcell illustrates the truth of Blake's proverb, 'The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom.'"

©2006 Josh Kilmer-Purcell (P)2011 Tantor

Critic reviews

"As tart and funny as a Noël Coward play." ( Booklist)

depressing

Would you say that listening to this book was time well-spent? Why or why not?

First of all, it's hard to listen to a story about a twenty something drag queen read but what sounds like an old straight guy. The story for me would have been much better if it actually sounded like the guy telling the story was about the story. secondly, i don't want to spoil the end but did it really have to end this way???

Unxpected diamond in the rough.....

Would you listen to I Am Not Myself These Days again? Why?

Yes because it is just fun and wild with just the right amount of bittersweet after taste. I didn't actually know this book would be about a drag queen when I started it guess I should have paid more attention before selecting, but after the surprise of finding out it was just a fun read.

What was one of the most memorable moments of I Am Not Myself These Days?

The description of the Christmas "performance" by one of the drag queens with the candy-cane prop had me crying I was laughing so hard and the finality of the end and push forward in time and sad pathetic "death" of Aqua also had me in tears but this time from sadness.

Great story

Great read, funny at times, original storyline that leaves you in awe.

July 18th, 2015

Great Read, Hilarious!

This book was hilarious, I was utterly amazed at times thinking oh my gosh did this really happen? I recommend it!

I was sobbing at the end

This is one of the saddest stories I have ever heard. Yes, there are many amusing incidents, but underlying everything is a fierce and desperate struggle. I kept trying to reconcile this Josh Kilmer-Purcell with the successful Beekman Boy, and it was almost impossible. All I can do is marvel that he survived, and that he is thriving despite the sorrow of his past. His story will stay with me for a long, long time.

Wow

A great memoir and beautiful story told excellently by mr. Kilmer-Purcell. Throughly enjoyed and highly recommend, although be warned it's explicit.

The funnier side of lifes adventures

Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

Yes I would highly recommend this audio book to a friend. And in fact, I already have. I throughly enjoyed the antics and humor in Josh's everyday life. The author and narrator bring life to this memoir.

What other book might you compare I Am Not Myself These Days to and why?

Josh's other book , Bucolic Plaque. His sence of writing is very conversational. I feel like he is sitting around having a conversation with me. His sence of humor and manor come through directly in his writting.

Which character – as performed by Johnny Heller – was your favorite?

Of course Aqua / Josh. The discription and thoughts of both aqua and josh are so excellently detailed, it is like you are there in the room with both of them, living the situation. All the steps to unvail Aqua and her wardrobe is amazing.

If you were to make a film of this book, what would be the tag line be?

The Life of Aqua, the DragQueen

Any additional comments?

I have already recommended this audio book to a few friends. Josh's sense of humor is addicting to listen too. His antics and lifestyle are a facinating read/listen. I will keep this book and his others to return to for listening again and again. When things get tough just add another layer of lipstick and some fresh water to the fish and march on.

a metaphor for one's own life

listening to the narrator drone on, demonstrated aqua life! story worth listening to while driving

What a world

If you could sum up I Am Not Myself These Days in three words, what would they be?

A great book and introduction to a world that this Southern housewife knows little about. While I never was a fan of Jack's, and not because he is/was a male escort or a crack addict. I just didn't think that he was good enough for Josh or Aqua, I still rooted for them to make it. Now learning more about Mr. Kilmer-Purcell and realizing that he was on the Amazing Race and one of my favorite contestants, I'm happy that they didn't work out. I doubt that Jack would have made any of Josh's wishes a priority and taken the time away from the beeper to travel the world, and win a million dollars. Josh's new partner seems like a true partner. Good for him and I look forward to reading his next book.

What was one of the most memorable moments of I Am Not Myself These Days?

His parents visit, while the lies were grander in his life, there are always lies about your life when you are in your twenties and you are dealing with your family.

Loved it

Where does I Am Not Myself These Days rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

This is the first audiobook I've ever listened too. At first I was a bit skeptical because I was never one for being told stories. I'm not going to lie I think I loved it a little too much.

What was one of the most memorable moments of I Am Not Myself These Days?

The most memorable moment surprisingly wasn't the Christmas scene (although it was hilarious) but the part where Jack writes on Josh's back "I love you more than heaven". The other most memorable, although not quite a moment, was the very last chapter.

What about Johnny Heller’s performance did you like?

I loved that he got into character based upon how Purcell described them. Again I'm new to audiobooks so I'm not sure if that is normal, but I loved that he would even sing when needed.

Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

YES YES YES

Any additional comments?

It can be very off putting with the lifestyle Purcell describes, but it adds a little something out of the ordinary which in a weird way kept me reading.