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Heads in Beds Audiobook

Heads in Beds: A Reckless Memoir of Hotels, Hustles, and So-Called Hospitality

Jacob Tomsky has worked in hotels for more than a decade, doing everything from valet parking to manning the front desk. He's checked you in, checked you out, separated your white panties from the white bed sheets, parked your car, tasted your room service, cleaned your toilet, denied you a late check out, given you a wake-up call, eaten M&Ms out of your mini-bar, laughed at your jokes, and taken your money. And in Heads in Beds, he pulls back the curtain on the hospitality business.
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Publisher's Summary

In the tradition of Kitchen Confidential and Waiter Rant, a rollicking, eye-opening, fantastically indiscreet memoir of a life spent (and misspent) in the hotel industry.

Jacob Tomsky has worked in hotels for more than a decade, doing everything from valet parking to manning the front desk. He's checked you in, checked you out, separated your white panties from the white bed sheets, parked your car, tasted your room service, cleaned your toilet, denied you a late check out, given you a wake-up call, eaten M&Ms out of your mini-bar, laughed at your jokes, and taken your money. And in Heads in Beds, he pulls back the curtain on the hospitality business, revealing the crazy yet compelling reality of an industry we think we know. It is an incredibly funny, authentic, and irreverent chronicle of the highs and lows of hotel life and boy, is there a market for it: in 2010, the American lodging industry generated $127.7 billion in revenue. Prepare to be amused, shocked, and amazed as he spills the unwritten code of the bellhops, the antics that go on the valet parking garage, and the housekeeping department's dirty little secrets.

Prepare to be moved, too, by his insightful honesty about the profession; employees are often poorly paid and frequently abused. However, Heads in Beds is more than just a memoir. Jake explains the secrets of the industry, offering easy and legal ways to get what you need from your hotel without any hassle - from scoring late check-ins and upgrades to getting that pay-per-view charge knocked off your bill. This book will give you the knowledge you need to get the very best service from any hotel or property, from any business that makes its money from putting heads in beds. Or, at the very least, it will keep the bellhops from taking your luggage into the camera-free back office and stomping the crap out of it.

©2012 Jacob Tomsky (P)2012 Random House Audio

What the Critics Say

"Jacob Tomsky is a star. The kid writes like a dream. Heads in Beds is hilarious, literate, canny, indignant and kind - revealing an author who manages somehow to be both a total hustler and a complete humanitarian. I love this book. Keep an eye on this writer. I'm telling you, he's a star." (Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman's Search for Everything Across Italy, India and Indonesia)

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

4.2 (594 )
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4.1 (546 )
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4.3 (548 )
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3 star
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2 star
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1 star
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Performance
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  •  
    TV Lover Phoenix, AZ 02-12-13
    TV Lover Phoenix, AZ 02-12-13
    ratings
    REVIEWS
    1
    1
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    Performance
    Story
    "What I should have expected"
    Would you recommend this book to a friend? Why or why not?

    Not a whole lot of surprises in the hotel business. There are a few tips on things you can do to improve your stay at a hotel, mostly, tip the hell out of everyone. And some obvious reasons not to piss off people who work at hotels. There was a story that tied it all together, but it was pretty redundant and not that interesting.


    How would you have changed the story to make it more enjoyable?

    Not sure a non-fiction book about working in the hotel industry could be made to seem much better


    Have you listened to any of Jacob Tomsky’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

    None.


    Did Heads in Beds inspire you to do anything?

    Tip more at hotels - although I'm not sure it helps. I think that the people this book will likely help more than anyone will be hotel employees who may get a few more tips from readers who buy into any truth to the book.


    Any additional comments?

    Kind of a dissappointment. If you read the articles written about this book, you pretty much got all the inside tips you are going to get.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Laurie Florence, KY, United States 02-09-13
    Laurie Florence, KY, United States 02-09-13 Member Since 2012
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    "Just let me sleep, thanks"

    I had heard alot about this book, so I thought I might pick up some great tips for traveling. Turns out, it's just a ho hum tell-all written by a whiny ex hotel worker. His big insight? Tip well. Gee, thanks!

    3 of 6 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Jodi Oak Park, IL, United States 02-05-13
    Jodi Oak Park, IL, United States 02-05-13 Member Since 2014
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    3
    2
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    "Might be one of my all-time favorite audiobooks"
    Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

    Yes! I've already reccomended it. It was funny, the subject matter was fresh and it made me feel a lot better about my own job. Plus I learned some tips that I'll use during my limited travels. I'm going to be passing out the baby bricks.


    What was one of the most memorable moments of Heads in Beds?

    There were too many laugh out loud moments. The most memorable though was hearing the extent to which the author tried to provide customer service--an amazing level of service that I think any company would be delighted to see--only to see management try to manage him out of a job. Sad times for the service industry.


    Have you listened to any of Jacob Tomsky’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

    No--has he written anything else? I'd listen.


    Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

    It really made me laugh. He has a great speaking style and really paints an interesting picture of the many colorful characters he encountered.


    Any additional comments?

    I only got this book because Dan Savage reccomended it and I was like "if Dan says so I'll try it." I would never have picked it up otherwise. It was such a great book though. I was worried at first that it would make me never want to stay at a hotel because I thought it might be filled with tales of bed bugs and germs, but I was plesantly surprised. I've always known that that is a tough job to be in, but I have even more respect for hotel staff now. I was always a good tipper before but now I am really going to be a "hitter" as Tommy would say.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Paul Centerville, OH, United States 02-05-13
    Paul Centerville, OH, United States 02-05-13 Member Since 2010
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    "OK, I get it"
    Any additional comments?

    This one's like the waiter rant. The workers are frustrated and angry. The only way out is to give them money and even then it never seems to be enough. I learned a lot seeing it from the other side, the story and the performance were well done, but I don't ever want to go to a hotel or a restaurant again.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Patricia Fort Collins, CO, United States 02-05-13
    Patricia Fort Collins, CO, United States 02-05-13
    ratings
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    "Just what I wanted at the time."
    Where does Heads in Beds rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

    This was the first audio book I've purchased


    What other book might you compare Heads in Beds to and why?

    "Kitchen Confidential" but not quite as gritty and foul. (unfortunately)


    Which character – as performed by Jacob Tomsky – was your favorite?

    Thomas


    Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

    It is amusing and informative for travelers.


    Any additional comments?

    I was looking for a light, amusing listen while I worked. Perfect. I looked forward to every chapter. I enjoyed it very much and will listen again before my next stay in a hotel. Well done Jacob!

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Allen Pittsford, NY, United States 02-05-13
    Allen Pittsford, NY, United States 02-05-13 Member Since 2014
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    "Loved it, funniest thing I've read in a long time!"
    Would you consider the audio edition of Heads in Beds to be better than the print version?

    The audio version was great because the author himself read it, and he is a great orator. A real personal spin that adds to the book.


    What was one of the most memorable moments of Heads in Beds?

    I love cheap thrills, so the "after-shave/cologne" scenario left me laughing out load.


    What about Jacob Tomsky’s performance did you like?

    He is a great story teller and excellent speaker. Seems very comfortable with himself and that comes out in his narration.


    Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

    The book wasn't heavy, just entertaining in a cheap laugh's kind of way. Laughed out load a few times, funny, funny, funny!


    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Ted K 02-04-13
    Ted K 02-04-13
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    "Fine, but not worth going out of your way for"
    Would you recommend this book to a friend? Why or why not?

    I would not - it has a couple good tips which I could tell them myself, and is not worth the ten hours of listening or whatever.


    Would you ever listen to anything by Jacob Tomsky again?

    Only if it was short.


    What about Jacob Tomsky’s performance did you like?

    He really knows his accents


    Did Heads in Beds inspire you to do anything?

    Steal from the minibar? I'm already generally very nice to hotel staff...I thought it would be more concise and filled with tips about what to do in hotels generally. It had a few tips but really, hearing about someone's work life is not my bag.


    Any additional comments?

    I'd bought this because Dan Savage raved about it on his podcast and then asked for tips about getting with a hotel worker...stuff like that was totally missing from the book, and in fact it was only mildly interesting.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Jatin 02-04-13
    Jatin 02-04-13
    ratings
    REVIEWS
    2
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    Performance
    Story
    "Entertaining narrative of the inside story"
    Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

    Yes


    What did you like best about this story?

    Gives nice little tid bits and advice about hotel life in an entertaining story, that would have been entertaining even as a fictional book.


    Have you listened to any of Jacob Tomsky’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

    No


    Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

    No. Did laugh at times.


    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Hannah BARRINGTON, IL, United States 02-04-13
    Hannah BARRINGTON, IL, United States 02-04-13
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    "Fascinating (if a bit long-winded)"
    What made the experience of listening to Heads in Beds the most enjoyable?

    Really interesting behind the scenes information about hotels - I will definitely think differently next time I check-in to one! Also, easy to connect and sympathize with the main character, as many of us have had those first terrible jobs.


    Who was your favorite character and why?

    The main character & narrator, Tommy.


    What do you think the narrator could have done better?

    There were times when his narrative grew a bit whiny - as if no one else had ever had such a difficult job or situation as him.


    Any additional comments?

    Worth a read, if just for the helpful hotel hints! But you'll get more from it than that.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Amazon Customer Tallahassee, FL, United States 02-03-13
    Amazon Customer Tallahassee, FL, United States 02-03-13 Member Since 2015
    ratings
    REVIEWS
    5
    2
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "I'm in the business for 15 years"
    Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

    I would definitely recommend this book for anyone who is interested in the inside of the hotel business. I've in the hotel business for 15 years, and a lot of what he says is true. It made me laugh, brought back some good times, and brought back some times I'd rather just forget about. Either way it's a great book. I like that the author read his own book because he really does give some of the characters that image that you can really see. For me it was great because I could relate to many of the issues.


    Who was your favorite character and why?

    Of course Tommy, but Perry is a good one too.


    What about Jacob Tomsky’s performance did you like?

    How he added that great voice to Perry and other characters.


    If you were to make a film of this book, what would be the tag line be?

    All in a day's work


    0 of 0 people found this review helpful

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