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Confessions of a Scary Mommy Audiobook

Confessions of a Scary Mommy: An Honest and Irreverent Look at Motherhood - The Good, The Bad, and the Scary

In a culture that idealizes motherhood, it’s scary to confess that, in your house, being a mother is beautiful and dirty and joyful and frustrating all at once. Admitting that it’s not easy doesn’t make you a bad mom; at least, it shouldn’t. When Jill Smokler was first home with her small children, she thought her blog would be something to keep friends and family updated. To her surprise, she hit a chord in the hearts of mothers everywhere. As other women shared their stories, Jill realized she wasn’t alone in her feelings of exhaustion and imperfection.
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Publisher's Summary

Sometimes I just let my children fall asleep in front of the TV.

In a culture that idealizes motherhood, it’s scary to confess that, in your house, being a mother is beautiful and dirty and joyful and frustrating all at once. Admitting that it’s not easy doesn’t make you a bad mom; at least, it shouldn’t.

If I can’t survive my daughter as a toddler, how the hell am I going to get through the teenage years?

When Jill Smokler was first home with her small children, she thought her blog would be something to keep friends and family updated. To her surprise, she hit a chord in the hearts of mothers everywhere.

I end up doing my son’s homework. It’s wrong, but so much easier.

Total strangers were contributing their views on that strange reality called motherhood. As other women shared their stories, Jill realized she wasn’t alone in her feelings of exhaustion and imperfection.

My eighteen month old still can’t say “Mommy” but used the word “shit” in perfect context.

But she sensed her readers were still holding back, so decided to start an anonymous confessional, a place where real moms could leave their most honest thoughts without fearing condemnation.

I pretend to be happy but I cry every night in the shower.

The reactions were amazing: some sad, some pee-in-your-pants funny, some brutally honest. But they were real, not a commercial glamorization.

I clock out of motherhood at 8 P.M. and hide in the basement with my laptop and a beer.

If you’re already a fan, lock the bathroom door on your whining kids, run a bubble bath, and settle in. If you’ve not encountered Scary Mommy before, break out a glass of champagne as well, because you’ll be toasting your initiation into a select club.

I know why some animals eat their young.

In chapters that cover husbands ("The Biggest Baby of Them All") to homework ("Didn’t I Already Graduate?"), Confessions of a Scary Mommy combines all-new essays from Jill with the best of the anonymous confessions.

Sometimes I wish my son was still little - then I hear kids screaming at the store.

As Jill says, “We like to paint motherhood as picture perfect. A newborn peacefully resting on his mother’s chest. A toddler taking tentative first steps into his mother’s loving arms. A mother fluffing her daughter’s prom dress. These moments are indeed miraculous and joyful; they can also be few and far between.”

©2012 Jill Smokler (P)2012 Brilliance Audio, Inc.

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

4.1 (241 )
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Performance
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  •  
    Amazon Customer 05-10-16
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    "boring"

    boring. we get it....parenting is hard. better as a website and not an entire book

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  •  
    kisa cle elum, WA, United States 04-23-13
    kisa cle elum, WA, United States 04-23-13 Member Since 2012
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Cracked Me Up!"
    Would you listen to Confessions of a Scary Mommy again? Why?

    This book was great, it made me feel much better knowing that there are so many moms (or maybe all moms) that are so much like me in my struggles to be a good mom, keep a sense of self and juggle everything else life throws at us.

    Caution: Do not listen to this while you're in the car with your kids ;)


    11 of 14 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Elizabeth 05-31-15
    Elizabeth 05-31-15
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    "Outstanding!"

    As a mom, I have days that I feel sub-par. I have days where I feel like everything I do is wrong, and that I'm the worst mother in the world. As I listened to this audiobook, I realized that there are so many women who feel the same way I do. Mrs. Jill Smokler is a genius! I laughed, I cried, and I learned to not be so hard on myself. Two thumbs WAY up!

    7 of 9 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Memyselfhjb Arnolds park, ia, United States 05-22-16
    Memyselfhjb Arnolds park, ia, United States 05-22-16 Member Since 2013
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    Performance
    Story
    "Oh my gosh, have we all lost it?"
    What could have made this a 4 or 5-star listening experience for you?

    A book about real motherhood with a comedian aspect. This book insulted my intelligence on a level that almost made me angry.


    Has Confessions of a Scary Mommy turned you off from other books in this genre?

    Oh, yes!


    What didn’t you like about Jill Smokler’s performance?

    She sounded so odd, brilliantly annoying, just like the book.


    What reaction did this book spark in you? Anger, sadness, disappointment?

    Anger/dissapointment maybe shock that this crap gets published?


    Any additional comments?

    Don't waste your money. If you are a mom you do not need this book you know it all already. And it almost insults women to be honest. I hated it!

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Jana 05-07-15
    Jana 05-07-15 Member Since 2015
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    "Best Parenting Book EVER!!!!!"

    While being pregnant as I hit the last few weeks of my pregnancy I started to worry about things like still loving my puppy, how my body would survive labor, how I would survive motherhood, I decided to read Scary Mommy after seeing someone post the Scary Mommy Manifesto on FB. This book has made me feel SO MUCH BETTER!!!! It's nice to know that other women out there felt/feel the same way I do. I didn't feel like I could talk to my friends or family with the way I was feeling I didn't think they would understand, but this book pretty much hit all of the anxieties and fears I had, made me laugh, and definitely made me feel like I would survive all the things motherhood would bring! I would recommend this to ANYONE who is pregnant, and as a laugh to any mommy out there. If you are gonna get something for the momma to be in addition to baby stuff for a baby shower GET THEM SCARY MOMMY, and don't forget to pick up a copy for yourself.

    4 of 6 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Leanne Hegarty 05-15-16 Member Since 2016
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "If you like your children and enjoy being a mother, don't read this"

    I didn't find anything particularly funny in the book at all. It is all actually quite depressing. It took about 3hours before she acknowledged that she actually did liked her children - sometimes.
    I know being a mother can be challenging, but if you don't want the challenge, don't have children; it is a choice.
    Sometimes when my daughter is doing something that irritates me, I take a deep breath and think how terrible it would be if something happened to her and she wasn't around any more to do the silly irritating thing.
    Children are so often a function of their environment. If they are running a muck, perhaps some mothers need to look at themselves first before they say how terrible and dysfunctional their kids are.
    Kids need disciple, routine, and most of all, unconditional love. It is all of their naughtiness, irritating ways, sneakiness, cheeky grins etc that make them so perfect.
    If you don't want the bad, you never get to have the wonderful, amazing and satisfying good.
    They're kids. When you get a puppy, you know it is going to pee on the floor; you expect it and mop it up. You know if you leave the door open, it will run away. So what do you do? You close the door. Why do so many people accept the mishaps of a puppy, but not a child? Why do so many of these mothers expect their children to act like adults? If you don't want the pee and the frustrations, don't have them. It is a choice.

    2 of 3 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Anthony R Taylor San Bernardino, CA, US 09-23-15
    Anthony R Taylor San Bernardino, CA, US 09-23-15 Member Since 2010
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    "I'm relieved after this book!"

    Funny and good read about motherhood. I'm pregnant with my 1st baby and I'm relieved after reading this book. I don't have to be a perfect mom and my kid will be ok!

    4 of 8 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Christina 04-08-15
    Christina 04-08-15
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    "Great book"

    this book is where its at ups and downs about motherhood. good and bad these are things as mothers we all go through

    3 of 6 people found this review helpful
  •  
    penelope Moraga, ca, United States 08-06-12
    penelope Moraga, ca, United States 08-06-12 Member Since 2014
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    "how can you not love it?"
    What did you love best about Confessions of a Scary Mommy?

    Irreverent, honest, funny, touching - the stories of all the ups and downs of motherhood.. and for an adoptive parent in the "waiting" stage, this gives me solace. It is confirmed that all my worst fears are true, BUT I am not the only one that thinks this way. What if I try for so long to become a mom and day after day, I will hate it? Looks like I will and I will also love it! These women's stories crack me up and help me pass the interminable wait with a smile.


    3 of 6 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Djvs 05-16-16
    Djvs 05-16-16 Member Since 2016
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    "Frustrated"

    I admit I'm not a stay-at-home mom. So maybe I'm not getting the full parenting experience. I do, however, I have a one-year-old, and I thought this book would be funny. What I found is that it celebrates and blissfully condones not only bad parenting, but also bad spousing. I mean, I'm not a perfect parent---I let my 1 year old eat 3 whole Barbados cherries yesterday (with 3 spiney pits each) and didn't tell the babysitter that it might hurt to poop today---but I don't take pride in my oversight and knowing others have done the same or worse doesn't make me feel better about it. I've already promised myself I won't do it again. I strive to be a better parent and spouse. I think it's the tone of the book that irritates me, not the content because I recognize no parent is perfect. Bad parenting is not ok---it happens--as parents we all have our oblivious and knowingly devious moments--but let's not write a book, grow complacent, and act like this is acceptable.

    1 of 3 people found this review helpful

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