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David

Tunbridge Wells | Member Since 2011

25
HELPFUL VOTES
  • 31 reviews
  • 190 ratings
  • 426 titles in library
  • 60 purchased in 2014
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  • Sourcery: Discworld #5

    • UNABRIDGED (7 hrs and 53 mins)
    • By Terry Pratchett
    • Narrated By Nigel Planer
    • Whispersync for Voice-ready
    Overall
    (1034)
    Performance
    (478)
    Story
    (485)

    A sourcerer is born in Discworld: a wizard so powerful that he makes all other magicians look like a bunch of fools in pointy hats. Now, suddenly, Discworld is brought to the brink of an all-out thaumaturgical war. The only hope for peace is Rincewind, the failed magician who has a risky plan to save the world. He enlists the help of several odd new characters, including Conina the barbarian hairdresser, Nijel the Destroyer, and a yuppie genie who sees lamps as a growth industry.

    Melisa says: "Discworld fans will love it!"
    "Rincewind is the best!"
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    While the Rincewind books are my favorite sub-series of Discworld, this is probably my least favorite of the Rincewind books. Still worth it if you like Rincewind.

    0 of 1 people found this review helpful
  • Critical Failures: Caverns and Creatures, Book 1

    • UNABRIDGED (8 hrs and 3 mins)
    • By Robert Bevan
    • Narrated By Jonathan Sleep
    • Whispersync for Voice-ready
    Overall
    (63)
    Performance
    (60)
    Story
    (60)

    Tim and his friends find out the hard way that you shouldn't question the game master, and you shouldn't make fun of his cape. One minute, they're drinking away the dreariness of their lives, escaping into a fantasy game and laughing their asses off. The next minute, they're in a horse-drawn cart surrounded by soldiers pointing crossbows at them.

    Chris and Clara Brown says: "Fun if you enjoy tabletop RPGs"
    "Not Sure if Gamer Humor."
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    In short, this is a worthwhile read. I enjoyed the narrator immensely. Whether he intended to capture the hokey voices done by DM's, GM's, Referee's and ST's everywhere or not, he did it. I'd swear to having done a few of those voices myself around table covered in inscrutable bits of paper claimed to be character sheets, and many, many dice.


    I'm just not sure this is actually gamer humor, as opposed to someone with passing familiarity with gamers making fun of them. The main characters are funny and their interplay is fun, but they are seriously unlikable. The author takes pains to heap it on with lots of sad loser traits on them all too. You could think a C&C player beat up the author and took his girlfriend if the author didn't belabor the point that no C&C player could ever know the touch of a woman.

    The story is far from an original idea, but I've never known it to be more than smoke break and downtime musing by most players. It's greatly redeemed by the ending, which was actually great and unexpected. Also, I'm confident that this book contains more instances of the words, sh*t and vomit than it does instances of the main character's names.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  • Equal Rites: Discworld #3

    • UNABRIDGED (7 hrs and 43 mins)
    • By Terry Pratchett
    • Narrated By Celia Imrie
    Overall
    (1316)
    Performance
    (619)
    Story
    (627)

    Lisa L. Hilton says: "Lots of fun"
    "The worst of the best series on Roundworld"
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    Celia Imrie is a fine narrator, but she was never suited to Discworld material and I'm surprised they let her try it on twice.

    This was the novel that made me quit reading Discworld books for years. Literal years, about five or six of them. I read the first two novels as fast as anything and then ran into this. Having now finished every other Discworld novel, this is the worst. It really seems that this was apparent to Pratchett too. Pretty much everything in this novel is sort of non-canon.

    Other than the later appearance of a rather different Granny Weatherwax almost nothing in this novel is connected to any later works. If Esk hadn't made a little appearance in I Shall Wear Midnight, I'd swear this novel had been blotted from the history of the disc.


    I didn't like this book the first time. I still don't like it. If there is any other discworld book you haven't already listened to, listen to it instead.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  • Comrades at Odds: A Tale from The Legend of Drizzt

    • UNABRIDGED (1 hr and 33 mins)
    • By R. A. Salvatore
    • Narrated By Ice-T
    Overall
    (87)
    Performance
    (78)
    Story
    (75)

    Actor and musician Ice-T is the Dungeon Master for this emotional, anguished tale. In Comrades at Odds, Tos'un is faced with a difficult decision as Drizzt comes to odds with his grief and guilt over the tragic fate of Ellifain.

    David says: "Listen to this BECAUSE Ice-T narrated it."
    "Listen to this BECAUSE Ice-T narrated it."
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    This was not a great story. Not quite the worst, but hardly a stand out in a collection of cutting room floor stories.

    And then they got Ice-T narrate it. And it was AWESOME.

    It's not a clinical Books for the Blind reading. It's Ice-T reads D&D, and it sounds like it. Ice-T brings something magical to Forgotten Realms. I've certainly never heard violence and combat narrated with such power.

    The whole collection was worth it just to hear this piece of narration.

    3 of 4 people found this review helpful
  • Free: The Legend of Drizzt: The Collected Stories

    • UNABRIDGED (10 hrs and 24 mins)
    • By R. A. Salvatore
    • Narrated By An All-Star Cast
    Overall
    (1516)
    Performance
    (1413)
    Story
    (1423)

    The Legend of Drizzt: The Collected Stories expands upon the epic legend of the dark elf with 12 tales performed by the all-star cast of Felicia Day, Dan Harmon, Greg Grunberg, Tom Felton, Danny Pudi, Sean Astin, Melissa Rauch, Ice-T, Wil Wheaton, Al Yankovic, Michael Chiklis, and David Duchovny!

    Robert Eric Koch says: "Just Plain Awesome"
    "You need to hear D&D as narrated by Ice T"
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    Having only read 3 of the 14 or so Drizzt's novels that preceed this, I felt a little lost. The story's are alright on their own merits, but I'm sure a lot of significance was lost on me. Also, it's rife with spoiler material.

    Most importantly though, Ice T narrates one of the stories, and it's amazing. I hadn't even finished his bit when I started looking to see if he'd done more books. Positively steals the show. Following directly after Melissa Rauch, I was terrified about how his female characters would sound, but there was no need to worry. He nails it.

    And while I'm mentioning her, Melissa Rauch is terrible. Her Catti-brie sounds like a leprechaun on helium and hard drugs. Seriously, I kept expecting her to shout about her Lucky Charms. On a positive note, the story she was narrating was so ludicrous that her performance sealed it as a slapstick comedy piece.

    Well worth a credit to hear Ice T read D&D and laugh as Melissa Rauch fails to be able to do a credible female voice despite having presumably having spoken in one for most of her life.

    5 of 7 people found this review helpful
  • Cibola Burn: The Expanse, Book 4

    • UNABRIDGED (21 hrs and 23 mins)
    • By James S. A. Corey
    • Narrated By Erik Davies
    • Whispersync for Voice-ready
    Overall
    (405)
    Performance
    (376)
    Story
    (373)

    An empty apartment, a missing family, that's creepy. But this is like finding a military base with no one on it. Fighters and tanks idling on the runway with no drivers. This is bad juju. Something wrong happened here. What you should do is tell everyone to leave. The gates have opened the way to a thousand new worlds and the rush to colonize has begun. Settlers looking for a new life stream out from humanity's home planets. Ilus, the first human colony on this vast new frontier, is being born in blood and fire.

    Striker says: "Decent Story, Lacking Good Narration"
    "The Narration isn't as bad as the story"
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    The narrator change is jarring but it wasn't a deal breaker. The new guy isn't Jefferson Mays by a long shot, but he's not actually that bad. He just pales by comparison.

    The story is dreadful. Several rather long subplots are introduced and resolved randomly, often contributing nothing to the story for their entire runs. We get to meet bit characters from previous novels, now starring in this one and revealing why they should have remained bit characters.

    Minus padding, and pointless subplots, this could have been a novella. And it still wouldn't have been a good one.

    I'm beginning to get the Lost/X-Files/Twin Peaks sense that they're just making crap up at random with no plan to resolve any of it. We're never really going to learn more, only get more mysteries added until the series chokes on them.

    3 of 8 people found this review helpful
  • The Eye of the Chained God: Dungeons & Dragons: The Abyssal Plague, Book 3

    • UNABRIDGED (10 hrs and 48 mins)
    • By Don Bassingthwaite
    • Narrated By Michael McConnohie
    • Whispersync for Voice-ready
    Overall
    (2)
    Performance
    (2)
    Story
    (2)

    In the aftermath of the plague demons' attack on Fallcrest, Roghar's inspiring optimism has played a significant role in the rebuilding of the town. Albanon, meanwhile, has not recovered so well. Tormented by his experiences and his near-transformations - first by Vestapalk then by Kri - he has retreated to Moorin's tower, where he immerses himself in books. He is the last member of the Order of Vigilance, touched by both the Voidharrow and Tharizdun - he feels as if he stands on the brink of madness.

    David says: "Can you have a good anti-climax?"
    "Can you have a good anti-climax?"
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    I listened to this right after I finally managed to finish the second book in the series (of which no review of mine has been printable). To be honest, just don't read it. You probably shouldn't read any of them.

    If you finished the first two novels in the series and are still even considering buying this book, then feel free to consider this review ignorant, uninformed hate-speech, but do remember later when you're feeling bored, let-down, and taken-advantage of, that you were warned.

    0 of 1 people found this review helpful
  • The Temple of Yellow Skulls: Dungeons & Dragons: The Abyssal Plague, Book 1

    • UNABRIDGED (11 hrs and 57 mins)
    • By Don Bassingthwaite
    • Narrated By Michael McConnohie
    • Whispersync for Voice-ready
    Overall
    (7)
    Performance
    (7)
    Story
    (7)

    Imprisoned in the void of a ruined universe by vengeful gods, Tharizdun - the Chained God, the Elder Elemental Eye - shares his exile with the Progenitor, a pool of liquid crystal that is all that remains of the Abyss that destroyed his universe. Enter our heroes Albanon, Shara and Uldane - all three adventurers readers will know from The Mark of Nerath. They thought their quests were over and done with, but danger still burns like the embers of a smoldering fire in the tall grass.

    David says: "Decent but not the first book"
    "Decent but not the first book"
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    Without reading "The Mark of Nerath", this book makes a lot less sense. Everything in this book was established in "Mark of Nerath", except the titular Temple of Yellow Skulls.

    Ignoring that, it's a decent adventure (if those elements were actually removed so it could stand alone, it would be an excellent adventure) and it is easily better than the next book in the series. I just can't escape how much it refers to the previous book. It fills in all the details, the characters spend a lot of the adventure talking about the events of the last adventure, which isn't marked as part of the series, or available on Audible.

    Honestly, I'd skip this one unless you've read "Mark of Nerath". If you have read "Mark of Nerath", you probably won't need me to tell you that you ought to skip this book. If for some reason you read this first, it completely and utterly spoils "Mark of Nerath" as they rehash, in detail, all the major plot points.

    Also, the second book has a different author. I blame this for ruining the second book (Oath of Vigilance", and I feel it's worth knowing about before you potentially become invested in the series.

    0 of 1 people found this review helpful
  • The Tomb of Horrors: Dungeons & Dragons: Greyhawk, Book 6

    • UNABRIDGED (10 hrs and 15 mins)
    • By Keith Francis Strohm
    • Narrated By Bernard Setaro Clark
    • Whispersync for Voice-ready
    Overall
    (17)
    Performance
    (16)
    Story
    (16)

    Kaerion Whitehart was once a mighty paladin, but sins of the past have cast him far from the light. Together with an elf mercenary, he now survives by the might of his sword alone. In exchange for a hefty purse, the two friends agree to accompany a band of patriots into a tomb haunted by fear and legend. They soon find the mission growing beyond their control. As warring factions vie for the ultimate prize of a long-dead wizard, Kaerion finds himself caught between death and redemption.

    Amazon Customer says: "I’ve not read much fantasy fiction"
    "Warning Contains Spoilers of Cliched Plot Elements"
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    I understand that the purpose of this whole series was to create novels around classic dungeon-crawl adventure modules, and that they have to work with some of the boring, predictable elements that were included in those modules, but this book was garbage, and not because of the original Tomb Of Horrors.

    The fallen paladin literally cries and whines through the entire book, displaying not a single redeeming characteristic, occupying about 8 of the 12 hours of listening time with descriptions of what a lousy piece of crap he is, and then, the author having murdered everyone else off just has the hand of god step in, and make everything better. Now here, Have your magical super-sword back, and one-shot the remaining bad guys, we've got to wrap this up in about six minutes.

    I've read better fan-fiction. written in sharpie. On truck stop men's room walls.

    2 of 4 people found this review helpful
  • Blackstaff Tower: Forgotten Realms: Ed Greenwood Presents Waterdeep, Book 1

    • UNABRIDGED (11 hrs and 11 mins)
    • By Steven E. Schend
    • Narrated By James Patrick Cronin
    • Whispersync for Voice-ready
    Overall
    (12)
    Performance
    (12)
    Story
    (12)

    A young group of friends stumble across a terrifying conspiracy that holds the heir to the Blackstaff, the defender of the city of Waterdeep, in terrible danger. These friends must search deep within themselves to become the heroes their city needs to save its champion from those who would see both brought low. Ed Greenwood, beloved author and creator of the Forgotten Realms, presents the first book in a brand-new series dedicated to showcasing both the City of Splendors and our most talented up-and-coming authors.

    David says: "I liked the goofy narrator voices."
    "I liked the goofy narrator voices."
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    I grabbed this one because the blurb said it was written for people who were new to Forgotten Realms and was showcasing Waterdeep. It fails utterly.

    It constantly references things that you'd need to be quite familiar with Forgotten Realms to understand, and up to date with it's constantly evolving story line. It showcases WaterDeep in much the same way that a really great performance of one of Shakespeare's plays showcases the excellent carpentry of the stage being performed on.

    The narrator does numerous voices, mostly intensely silly. They meld a bit later, as three characters seem to use the same "Big, dopey guy" voice.


    0 of 1 people found this review helpful
  • Angus, Thongs, and Full-Frontal Snogging: Confessions of Georgia Nicolson

    • UNABRIDGED (5 hrs and 1 min)
    • By Louise Rennison
    • Narrated By Stina Nielson
    Overall
    (174)
    Performance
    (52)
    Story
    (54)

    Several things about 14-year-old Georgia Nicolson's life are very wrong. Her bedroom smells like her little sister probably peed somewhere, but she can?t find where. Angus, her enormous cat, keeps terrorizing Mrs. Next Door's poodle. Dad's gone off to look for work in New Zealand. And one of her friends has rated Georgia's nose a zero on a scale from 1-10. But what's really driving her crazy is that Sex God Robbie doesn't give her the time of day.

    Kristi says: "Hilarious listen for pre-teens and adults"
    "Wonderful Narration!"
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    The story really is great, but I'm in love with Stina Nielson's narration. She really brings Georgia to life, and reminds me of some of my favorite comedians from BBC Radio 4. I enjoyed the diary/journal format, as well. It kept things punchy and succinct, so Georgia never becomes as annoying and hate-able as a silly, self-obsessed teenager ought to be. As she as can manage to do something dreadful, you're into another entry where she's correcting her actions, or at least suffering for them.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful

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