Unrequited AI Lust
This book is somewhat similar to Red Dwarf in terms of British accents, humorous dialogue, emphasis on widespread booze consumption in key parts of the story, feline characters and milk toast junior officers who, over the course of the story, go from zero to hero.
Magisterial. Barnaby Edwards is a narrator of the first water. Each character's voice was unique. He even threw in a quality rendition of what cat people and aliens probably sound like, if they could talk.
Join us and see how the Munstro's Artificial Intelligence quenches her obsessive thirst to be Captain Dangler's submissive e-slave as she begs him to download his humungous hard drive deep into all of her ports over and over and over.
This audiobook won't exactly unravel the mysteries of the cosmos, nor will it get you any closer to that MENSA membership, but you will laugh at least 27 times and maybe forget about that nagging "life crisis" du jour that has you by the stones. Drop a couple dimes, get the audiobook and just relax for a couple of hours. You deserve it.
Yes. This book is essential reading for all humans interested in any / all of the following:
1. spending an enjoyable 5 hrs listening to a funny story; 2. laughing when a humorous scene unfolds - and my unofficial count came to 32 give or take a couple; and 3. rooting for the underdog character reeling from the blows but staying strong and sliding into a relationship upgrade before the curtain falls.
The girlfriend of Albert's best friend. Where to begin? No joke - get this audiobook and let her world wash over you like a sticky spatter of love. What a woman! She is a hard working young lady absolutely dedicated to providing her diverse, loyal customer base 100% guaranteed satisfaction. Her front door, back door, even the upstairs window are always open. She will bend over backwards, even get on her knees to please her clients.
With all of this said, don't forget that she is also deeply in love with Edward, her not-so-worldly shoe repairing boyfriend. Their love is the love that lasts through all time. Edward is a lucky man to have her by his side.
He narrated this audiobook cleanly and mixed in some well done voices for the diverse cast of characters.
I was particularly touched in the scene where Edward shows up at his girlfriend's work a bit early before she is done for the day in order to surprise her. He has to wait a few minutes becausesShe is getting drilled hard by one of her customers. When he hears her soft rhythmic moaning subside and then her begging for her cowboy to cum in her mouth, he knew it wouldn't be long before she would walk down those stairs and into his loving arms. Their embrace in the lobby was as tender a moment as I can ever recall. Love IS a wonderous thing!
Buy this audiobook! A wonderful way to spend an afternoon. If you don't find this book funny, then you are not the answer, you are the problem!
Hey Seth, hope there is more stuff like this in that dome of yours. This is my kind of out of left field, bust up laughing book so rarely offered by Audible these days. Keep pumping out the good stuff, and I will keep coughing up the jack to buy it.
The dialogue between characters was really interesting - a bunch of nailed one liners and retorts, especially from Tristan. That gal has a biting verbal slap on tap and has no compulsions about letting them loose.
Ray Chase scored another 10 out of 10 on my narrator excellence scale. He brings every character to life in a uniquely cool way. In my opinion, he has secured a spot on the starting squad of the top team in the big leagues when it comes to narration.
Subject matter being.......science fiction? How humanity copes with sudden mass extinction through a pandemic prior to alien invasion? As long as the author is creative as Mr. Robertson and Ray Chase is sitting in the narrator's chair my interest will continue to wax.
To be frank, this question doesn't exactly jive with a science fiction book focused on 2 sets of siblings trying to stay alive and together while humanity slouches into oblivion around them. I'd say the author has a keen insight into the depth of solidarity that can exist between siblings when circumstances demand they make tough decisions. The bonds run deeper than one may acknowledge when sauntering through 'salad days".
Absolutely nothing. Ray Chase has my pocketful of votes for Narrator of the First Half of the Second Decade Award hands down. Mr. Chase is so fun to listen to. I pretty much automatically press purchase when I see his name in the narrator spot. Keep up the good work, Mr. Chase!
This audiobook flew by, and that's a good thing. I am impressed with the Breakers series so far and will press play on Book 3 as soon as I stop typing. This was one of those books that I wished would just keep going on so I could "hang out" with the characters. That's either kind of sketchy and somewhat worthy of waving a mental yellow flag of concern or it is a symptom of finisher's remorse after listening to a well written and narrated piece of science fiction worthy of this glowing endorsement and the multi-5 star rating given by yours truly at the top of this review. I am leaning toward the latter.
This audiobook receives a 9.24 out of 10 on my Modified Indexed Listening Formula (MILF) scale. I own somewhere in the low four digits of audiobooks, so the above mentioned rating is my way of saying get this audiobook! If you are interested in books about Normandy operations and the fighting inland around Caen, then you will not find a more in depth account from Audible.
There was more of an accumulation of memorable moments that leave a lasting impression - Canadian soldiers fought with tenacity and valor against some of the most determined and well led soldiers Germany could produce - 12SS PzD "Hitlerjugend" and other I & II SS Korps forces. There was absolutely no love lost between the Canadian and Hitlerjugend soldiers, and I am putting it mildly. If the Canadian forces had mid level and divisional commanders even half as combat savvy and competent as the German forces had, then the Canadians would not have suffered such terrible losses in men and materiel in the July and August operations south of Caen.
Favorite scene does not really fit with my impression of this military history audiobook. A scene that I particularly remember was the fierce fighting in and around St. Andre, May-sur-Orne and Verriers Ridge areas between the Black Watch Regiment and elements of 9SS PzD "Hohenhstaufen". Listening to Mr. Zuehlke's account of this area of operations, one gets a strong sense of the vulnerability Canadian forces had in attacking a well entrenched enemy, armed with state of the art equipment - 1 Mg-42 per 12 riflemen, powerful Panther tanks able to knock out Canadian armor from a long distance, and support from Nebelwerfer detachments able to bring down deadly accurate fire observed from Verriers Ridge.
Of course I didn't laugh or cry - this is a well researched, sober account of a hard fought area of operations during the inland fighting phase of the Normandy campaign. Mr. Zuehlke provided a much needed / deserved historical spotlight on the Canadian forces who bore the brunt of intense, bloody fighting during the above mentioned time period.
This is a very well written book by a military historian of the first water. Mr. Zuehlke has done Canadian veterans and all students military history a huge service by writing this and the several other WWII books about the Canadian Corps contributions to the Allied victory over the Axis. This audiobook is a must for all students of military history. I must thank Audible for the availability of Mr. Zuehlke's books to us listeners.
Books like Breakout from Juno are what I and hopefully many other people want to see from Audible. I wish there were more audiobooks of this caliber available, and less mindless chick-lit formulaic romance dribble that takes so much of Audible's virtual book shelf space these days.
In my humble opinion, I think it is pathetic that there is such a big demand for that kind of audio-crap. For example, count up each week how many audiobooks are released that have a picture of some guy without a shirt with some clingy chic wrapped around his torso versus the number of books about actual scientific topics (not esp or how to live with yourself or ufo conspiracies) and history books like Breakout from Juno. For the record, I have not actually put figures to paper, but why should I? It is so overwhelmingly scaled on the audio crap side that I end up having to rant like I am doing right now. Audible can do better. I wish Audible would do better.
Yes. This installment is another solid addition to B.V. Larson's Star Force series. Once I started it up it was hard to turn off. First Sargent Quan and Marvin continue their wary alliance as they help Griggs defend sentient life against those pompous Crustaceans and backstabbing Macros. Everyone everywhere should get the chance to follow the glorious deeds of the greatest robot in the history of everything - Marvin!
Any time Marvin grabs the mic. a memorable moment is on tap. I get a huge kick just listening to him as he tries to leverage as much personal advantage as possible out of every exchange. Marvin the Magnificent is always in the mix, always shaping conversation to squeeze out some self-aggrandizing concession - another camera, new appendages, a couple more vats to expand his colony of captive micro wonder bugs. As hope fades and humanity is crumbling under the Macro's boots, or being diced by some sadistic Crustacean's pincers, who slides in from the abyss and saves our collective asses yet again? That's right - Marvin!
When Marvin gets the helm and everyone but him groans and rolls their eyes. Jealousy, pure and simple. They may hem and haw, but deep down inside they are thanking every diety they can conjure that Marvin is on their side. Marvin may have his faults, but don't we all? Think of it this way, if you were stuck alone in vacuum space with fourteen pissed off Macros zorching towards you with malice aforethought who do you call?
All together now - Marvin!
Extreme reaction? Well...not really. I did not cry, but I laughed 46 times give or take a few. I frequently found myself smiling as yet again Griggs has to turn to his designated savior of mankind - Marvin!
Hey B.V. - if you ever feel in a rut with this series, I have a suggestion. Start a new a epic space saga with Marvin at the head of a band of conniving, passive aggressive uber probes tasked with the mission of eradication of everything lame, slow or otherwise chronically in the way. Marvin's jurisdiction is only limited by the scope of your imagination, Mr. Larson. And I can say, without fear of contradiction, that you are one creative individual. So, think about it. At least two beings will be fired up: yours truly and my favorite robot - Marvin!
I did and it was as fresh as the first time. Solid mil sci fi action throughout. Evil Crustacean and/or Macro "egg stealing mites" to despise and massive pictophile Worm People and long-winded Bovines to root for.
Marvin. In my opinion, Marvin is the greatest robot character I have come across, ever. Every time this robot enters a scene he has an agenda and a plan. He is loyal to the Colonel and no else, as everyone one else would have shut his meddling, borderline genocidal ass down by about the 20th minute of book 3.
Does this adversarial relationship with 98% of the rest of the characters slow him down? Might Marvin not get to mount that 8th or 9th camera? Absolutely not. Marvin triumphs every time. Why? Because he has perfected his method of systematically terrorizing those little micro-life savers into being the sole provider of the one thing humans crave most of all -an almost 100% guarantee of bio-tastic musculature, outer extremity regeneration and increased ability to bring the hammer down when hammering is due. Those bugs are the reason almost everyone who matters in the story is still alive at the end of this installment. No bugs, no more characters. Who keeps the bugs alive - barely? That's right - Marvin.
Marvin is the keeper of the flame. Wherever Marvin is, hope is not far away. Does it matter that he is pretty much always the first to bail out in any crisis situation zorching away to safety with some soon to be really needed power generator pod strapped to his back? Not on your life. Marvin knows that once the fleet of Lobster missile ship's are finally destroyed after being collectively t-boned by a salvo of missiles piloted by suicidal bovines outfitted with thermonuclear boompacks, Marvin will be right by his Colonel's side with 4 - 5 of his cameras zeroed on the Colonel's face as he stands there checking out the Captain's tight little ass as she stoops to pick up that pen that always seems to be on the floor next to her bridge console when the Colonel orders her to take down some notes.
Yes. 7-8 other performances. This installment's narration continues Mr. Boyett's string of top notch performances. He has this series and these characters down cold.
Will Marvin finally get to video THE event of the whole space trip - the Colonels' insatiable psycho girlfriend grinding her fearless leader as he lies on his back with the Captain pulling the all important multi-task of sitting on his face and simultaneously french kissing his pneumatic girlfriend?
We might need a rather large billboard, but damn it! This is America! We'll get the biggest God-damned billboard if that's what gets the job done.
Americans are finishers. We are Back to Back World War Champs!
By the way, who is smack dab in the middle of the above described action again? Marvin. This series should have been name Marvin's Star Force or Star Force Marvin. I kind of like the latter. What do you think?
This whole series has been a joy to listen to. BV Larson is an author of the first water. He knows his stuff. I am a better person after listening to this audiobook. I Hope this series goes on for another 12-14 years. As long as Marvin and the Microbes are in the mix, these characters can live long enough to see every single person they hold dear or are acquainted with mature, rise to their active middle years and then slowly die of old age. And who wouldn't want to pass that opportunity up!
Gabriel's Revenge ranks 8.92 out of 10 on my Modified Indexed Listening Formula (MILF) scale, which is nothing to sneeze at. Why? Because it isn't.
Evan Gabriel was a hard as nails, government sanctioned killer of all things evil who has to carry several metric tons of psychic baggage since he was about 2 1/2 years old. He had more ghosts stalking him than the total spooks who chased that shiftless peach fuzz Shaggy and his gangly mutt Scooby in three years of that show's episodes.
Evan will corpse up anyone who stands in his way, especially if it is one of those banditos from the SAR. When one of these soulless cucarachas had a reverse MENSA brainwave and told his cronies, "I know what will make Evan Gabriel crumble and throw in the towel, I'll kidnap the one person left in this solar system and local star cluster that Evan truly loves and cares for with all of his heart - his hot girlfriend. Yeah that will make him back down. Hey amigo, pass me some more of that crappy Chilean ripple heh, heh, heh," If there is a better example of famous last words that ends up biting your ass and entire lower torso off I have not heard it.
Didn't the guy who uttered this nonsense remember what happened two weeks ago on Planet Armpit, or something to that effect, when Evan and the surviving half dozen of his merry band of merciless unrelenting space avengers ground into a mushy paste each one of the 82 assorted mercenaries, 60 Asian ninja wannabes and 39 innocent bystanders too slow to scramble away from the fusillade of bullets and pulse laser beams? And that was for some Mars-based washed up politician's son who really never entered the story in any meaningful way. Yeah, idiot, grab Evan's girlfriend, he won't get pissed.
Evan is about to get a new hole in the back of his head by the head mercenary guy but his "brain buddy" pulls an ace out of its virtual sleeve and ends that nonsense. The next thing you hear is a wet pop and BING! we now have a headless mercenary guy.
Evan Gabriel will hunt you down and destroy you along with everything you love and cherish if you don't immediately line up at this theatre and buy a ticket for his movie. And yes, there is a red light beam zeroed on your sternum. Make your decision.
Ray Chase is the right guy for this genre. He has a lyrical and - it is hard to put in words - a way of narration that makes scenes a trip to listen to. For example, every time that space ship captain friend of Evan speaks, his voice is just a tad on the pompous or unabashed self important side, which I dig. Ray Chase does this kind of thing in many of his narrations, usually for a character in some kind of leadership position. Every time I hear that tone of voice I either start laughing or crack a smile. I like that kind of narrative style because it keeps the storyline light while not taking away from the overall mood. And don't we all need a little dollop of lightness in our day?
Too many audiobooks these days are way too heavy and dark with some crappy two-bit kingdom lousy with shiftless wizards who have absolutely nothing else to do but come up with new ways of fucking with people who just want to be left alone so they can get that stuff they need and go home and eat. All I have to say to the wizard community at large is "Hey losers, why don't you get a job, get a life and get the hell out of my world! Oh, and before you go, get yourself a new dress. That mu mu or whatever you got on stinks like crap and makes you look like an emaciated grief chick. And please brush your remaining 5 teeth. Your breathe is ...... you get the point."
I am sick of wading through the thousands of redundant "Crown of the Zogflith" or 'Swordmen of the Blagghespl" type audiobooks. They bring down the general tone.
All that genre that should be left to the people who really deserve that kind of morbid tripe - 103 pound brace faced D and D players, pizza faced puss bags and the chronically virginal who look like that guy who runs the comic book store in "'The Simpsons". Now, I shall make like my pants and split!
For the record, reader, the questions I was originally strapped with have magically disappeared and the ones you see here probably bare no connection to my replies. No joke,POOF! just switched 20 seconds ago. As I have just wasted an hour of my life trying to come up with a review, I decline to change my responses to conform to this new set. I put up the review anyways out of spite and contempt for the nudnicks at Audible who perpetrated this act on me. Sorry for the confusion. Thanks again for fucking with me Audible!
Now to my review that now makes little if any sense.
Yes. I plan on revisiting this audiobook in 7 months and 14.5 days. Why? EZ Audible. Your computer generated unimaginative question borders on the accusatory. I'll get back to this book, just don't get all pissy about it. When I do, I'll drop you a line, alright?
I would compare Lines of Departure to one book in particular - "Like a Cliff in the Ocean" by Kurt Ullrich. The two books are almost totally unrelated other than they both chronicle wartime experiences and the first letter of each title is L.
Grayson's unit had just finished kicking the crap out of a Chinese battalion on one of those god forsaken toxic planets. His squad is just about to break out the soy-based synth champagne and toast their victory when they all suddenly froze, looked up into the inky nothingness and saw death zorching into view and then proceed to swat down the UNA space fleet (Grayson's ride back home). As I listened to this scene I briefly closed my eyes, bowed my head and murmured "f......k, these guys are toast." Needless to say, I was thoroughly in the moment. Yet another sign of an audiobook well written and professionally narrated.
Maybe I am a bit dense, but didn't I just answer this question? If a scene particularly moves me, it tends to be a favorite scene. Which mouth breathing missing link intern over at corporate is coming up with these questions?
Hey Audible - thanks for posting questions so as to make actually reviewing this audiobook as difficult as possible.
What I now get to say is this audiobook is a top notch piece of military science fiction.
The author created a truly bleak picture of a future Earth infested with shiftless ghetto rats sardine canned into crumbling urban mega-slums. Put it this way, to show how much the good ol' USA had slouched into what I can only describe as a putrid armpit, the author gives us a scene from an earlier book in this series when Grayson was a grunt in the TA and his unit was pinned down in an exposed position receiving fire from the upper stories of a bombed out high rise tenement. All of a sudden there is an explosion in one of the building's lower stories which causes massive structural damage and sends the whole building pancaking down on itself in a cacophony of wrenching rebar and cries of lament.
Grayson and his comrades were saved that day by a bad batch of teeth loosening twitch powder that blew up another poorly ventilated "stim lab" in that building, thus snuffing out the snipers who were trying to pick them off. A big chunk of the human population basically devolved into heavily armed, jacked up cockroaches. Tough world, no doubt.
In Lines of Departure, this foul dystopoia keeps wheezing along. The new enemy is exponentially more deadly than anything humans can cook up. These intergalactic losers, these oversized pesky CO2 sucking scum bags want our stuff, we won't let them have it. Can humanity drop all of their petty quarrels and shout a collective "Get your own stuff you slackjawed leaches!" Only time will tell. Only one side will be left standing.I add in summation that there is no one, and mean no one who can pull off the paranoid shriek an overwhelmed, scared shitless soldier makes like Luke Daniels. He is a pro, and when given a narration gig like this book, he rises to the challenge and cracks a liner out of the park. He can mix in 12 different character voices one after the other and then seamlessly deadpan back into narrator mode without skipping a beat. His range is limitless, the southern drawled, squeaky voiced Barney Fife type character being my favorite. I hope Mr. Kloos keeps pumping out books like this, and Mr. Daniels is offered the narrator's spot. They make a solid team. I will definitely snap up books by this talented duo.
As far as I can tell....Yes, absolutely. I have not purchased the print version, opting to listen to the narration. I wonder how many people who bought the print version turned around and purchased the audiobook. Out of the couple thousand printed books and the almost couple thousand audiobooks I have purchased so far, I think I have bought both versions maybe 10 times, and never contemporaneously. Seems a smidge redundant and the narrator never keeps up with my reading pace, so I end up not really hearing the narration.
When Jessica turns that pick up driving pervert's nutsack into jelly with a well placed boot kick. I saw it coming as soon as she started down that road back on Earth. That reprobate dirt farmer should have known as soon as he saw Jessica - a woman I have obviously never met, as I am real and she is not - that she could kick his ass and twist his head off without breaking a sweat. From what I have heard so far in this series Jessica is one of those firm femme fatales that can make a man think he holds the reins, only to end up securely spread eagled on some table in her basement with a rubber ball in his mouth and Jessica standing there about to begin her version of education through total submission.
If I just read the book, I wouldn't know what I am missing, as I wouldn't hear his narration.
I don't remember crying, as I am a rather jaded pessimist these days. To get the tears flowing Mr. Brown would have to step up his game several notches and create more potential heart wrenching situations.
A quick note to the author: In the first book of this series less than 10 minutes from the beginning you had Nathan drilling Jessica in the closet during some party. I thought, "Allo Allo! Might this series have that special combination of techno-matic bowel loosening action AND a bunch of scenes when Nathan grabs Jessica or Cameron or maybe both at once and throws her / them on the dead captain's king sized waterbed and proceeds to pound like a pornstar? Could there finally be a series where three mid-twenties nubile, single humans find themselves in command of a kick ass spaceship and proceed to corpse up all Jung and other space scum who get in their way AND follow along as Jessica and Cameron, all dialed up after screwing their captain back to the stone age, get into sweaty scantily clad cat fights over who has the real skills?"
All I can say is that I am still waiting. Come on, Ryk! Throw me and hopefully other like minded listeners a bone. I am not asking for much. The possibilities are endless with your dynamic trio. Here we are - 9 books into the series, who knows how many Earth months have past, all of the grownups have been conveniently slaughtered in the first half of the first book and not even a friggin kiss, boob squeeze or unintentional gluteus grope after that quickie in the closet.
To be honest, I am bringing this subject up not for myself. I am not some freak who is always slinking around looking for lurid second-hand saturnalia. I am writing this plea to you, kind author, on behalf of Nathan and, surprisingly, Cameron. Through the wonders of audiobook telepathy these two yearning yet frustrated lovebirds have thrown me a Vulcan mind meld asking me to tell you, and I quote, "Don't deny our love. Oh, and Jessica wants a piece of the action." They can't get a whiff of action because you have heartlessly written any and all traces of a perfectly normal, healthy act, i.e. sex out of their lives. Nathan is turning into a total basket case and Cameron, poor Cameron is on the verge of sneaking out of the Aurora and opening up the air valve on her space suit.
Ryk, do you want this on your conscience? They are trying to save Earth from total destruction for Christ's sake. Show them a little respect. You have let them live, I now ask you to let them love!
No less than 9.5 out of ten. This is a quality audiobook, narrated by a top shelf pro.
St. George and Stealth, the ravishing runway model and avenging ninja, are at a bar waiting for that scientist to show up. After throwing down the wadded up tissue in his nose .... you will know why when you start listening .... St. George opened up a family sized can of woop ass in the most one sided show of sack since Darth Vader, from the comfort of his personal planet crusher - the Death Star - telepathically vice gripped across the galaxy and fatally choked out that incompetent, rat faced Imperial vice admiral guy live on view screen.
Jay Snyder is a narrator of the first water. Peter Clines made the narrator's job a lot easier by writing a book with a bunch of great lines. I lost count of how many different ways Clines described what happened when St. George's fist impacted a zombie's rib cage or skull. His pacing kept the story flowing very well. He hit the right notes throughout. A solid audiobook got great very quickly because of Jay Synder.
A moment that particularly moved me was when St. George, after smashing two deadun's heads together, "like two pinballs...." brushed another post-living fool's teeth fragments out of his shirt sleeve and then drove his fist through the gummer's face, his knuckles breaking out the back of the skull. The cherry on top was Clines' post impact statement, "the sound could only be described as pulpy." I could go on and on retelling other particularly moving moments, but this one somehow stood out.
I bet 1.5 bazillion people will purchase this audiobook. In my humble opinion, I think this one is tops in the series, with the others close behind. Hey Peter Clines, I know you have at least 7 - 8 more books for this series in that brilliantly f....ked up dome of yours. Keep them coming!
Human Plus ranks 8.65 - 9.28 out of 10 in my modified rating scale. This audiobook combined a fast paced storyline with sizable slabs of thought provoking techno-cognitive harangues. As an added bonus, the author was gracious enough to include an omnipneumatic sex goddess whose mission in life is to be pounded like a pornstar by the main character as often as possible in order to compensate for feelings of rejection and low self esteem after some brainiac power monger that got his fill and then chucked her. Why didn't Human Plus score higher? Blame James' earth shakingly poor decision regarding his relationship with the above mentioned beauty.
When James is smacked in the side of his head by a lead pipe named cold hard truth regarding who he is and what he is destined to do.
I have listened to many audiobooks narrated by Ray Chase. This audiobook compares quite favorably. In my opinion, this book is the second best one out of the 4 book series. The first book, Sub-Human I believe, tops it for reasons that you, fair reader, probably do not give a damn about anyways.
Extreme reaction? The closest I came to extreme was when James makes that decision I have already mentioned regarding his relationship with his girlfriend - a healthy, bright eyed eager young woman who pretty much admits to his face that all she wants to be is his own personal nympho. I just stood there shaking my head.
I hope there are more sequels coming. Ray Chase is the perfect fit for this kind of book. He brings a certain something to the books he narrates that I would prefer to listen to him read the book to me rather than sit and read the book. That is the mark of a quality narrator.
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