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Portland, ME, United States | Member Since 2008

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  • 107 titles in library
  • 1 purchased in 2014

  • Let's Pretend This Never Happened (A Mostly True Memoir)

    • UNABRIDGED (8 hrs and 41 mins)
    • By Jenny Lawson
    • Narrated By Jenny Lawson

    For fans of Tina Fey and David Sedaris - Internet star Jenny Lawson, aka The Bloggess, makes her literary debut. Jenny Lawson realized that the most mortifying moments of our lives - the ones we'd like to pretend never happened - are in fact the ones that define us. In Let's Pretend This Never Happened, Lawson takes readers on a hilarious journey recalling her bizarre upbringing in rural Texas, her devastatingly awkward high school years, and her relationship with her long-suffering husband, Victor.

    D. S. Smith says: "How the Bloggess almost made me crash my car!"
    "Warning: Don't listen on your way to a funeral!"

    Ok, so I listened to this book on a seven hour car trip by myself to attend a favorite aunt's funeral. In hindsight, a dumb idea. I had figured I needed an upbeat listen while going to such a sad event. My usual fare of heartwarming books about special dogs who die too young or biographies about people battling debilitating mental illness would just tempt me to drive off an interstate bridge in a heightened depressed state of mind. It was going to be a sad occasion so I needed to keep my spirits up. Unfortunately, it worked too well. Jenny Lawson's reading of her book had the effect of planting some amazingly ridiculous images in my mind which stayed there through the funeral mass, despite my best efforts to brainbleach them out. Most notably, I got a totally inappropriate set of gigglefits during the homily with the image of Jenny requesting her obstetrician to "sew up her vagina" with a Harry Potter lightning bolt after the birth of her daughter. This was so that when she got menstrual cramps in the future she could claim it was because Voldemort was nearby. My sister and stepmother, sitting with me at the service, kept stealing worried glances at me, convinced I was experiencing a serious breakdown in my grief but also puzzled as to why my sobs sounded more like stifled guffaws. The book is seriously that funny. I felt a little like Mary Richards in an old Mary Tyler Moore episode...the one where Chuckles the Clown is killed in a circus parade by a stampeding elephant because he is dressed as a giant peanut. Mary is appalled at everyone's jokes about the event until the funeral when the absurdity of the situation finally hits her and she can't keep from laughing. I finally had to get up, climb across an entire pew of grief-stricken relatives and go outside to deal with my laughter. I knew my wonderful aunt would understand but the rest of my relatives...not so much. Their reactions ranged from deep concern about my mental well-being to just plain being pissed-off that I lost it in church. Both groups seemed to avoid any contact with me for the rest of the day

    My point is this book is FUNNY...not just polite tee-hee, "isn't that clever" amusing... but laugh-out-loud, howl til you cry and maybe wet yourself, lose your breath and get a headache hysterical! Even the sad parts (and there are some) have humor. I want this woman as my best friend so I can call her up and just listen to her to keep my endorphins going. I just KNOW we could manage to get into some very imaginative and memorable trouble together. She doesn't take herself, anyone else or life too seriously and I'm pretty sure that's the way we are intended to live. I'll have to ask my favorite aunt the next time I see her.

    Disclaimer: Ok, so I didn't actually embarrass myself at the funeral but I borrowed a trick of Jenny's by mixing fact and fiction. So I will edit this to read "A Mostly True Review."(less)

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