Springfield, MO, United States | Member Since 2010
A zombie laughing his head off. Do ghouls eat popcorn with their fingers? No they eat their fingers separate. (spoiler alert) Those were the two best jokes in the entire book.
This is cute and sometimes silly. You will often crack a smile, but you will not LOL. I thought it was ok, just not real good. I am always routing for Anderson. He has written over forty novels, and most people don't know who he is. His problem to me is that he is always writing in other peoples' universes. His Seven Suns saga which I like is probably his best work. I have read the first five novels in that saga and plan on reading them all. Even though this was ok, I will not continue the series. With great writers like Jim Butcher, Dean Koontz and Christopher Moore, why waste my time with a pretender.
My advice to Anderson is to return to Science Fiction and come up with something original.
Narrator was pretty good.
Only old farts like me will probably get the title, a reference to a classic B Movie called Warriors. Probably the only Warriors not included in this collection would be gang bangers.
It is hard for an anthology to get a high rating as it usually only takes one bad story to bring the whole rating down. If you are looking for that one good story, then this is an excellent collection. Most of these stories are over an hour long. There are twenty stories and the book is over 31 hours long. Some are shorter and the one by Martin is three and a half hours long. I was a little worried when I started the book, as usually anthologies start with one of there best stories, and this started with one of it's weakest stories. I would suggest that after ten minutes you are not enjoying the story, fast forward, there will be some great stories later. I also like this type of collection, as I got to hear from authors I have never heard from before. The Best story was from Lawrence Block and he writes in a genre a rarely read in. He has a new fan now and I will be seeking his writings out.
By the reviews a lot of people got this book for many different authors. I can only speak to my own tastes. I really liked the stories by Lawrence Block, Joe R. Lansdale, Robert Silverberg, Tad Williams and Joe Haldeman. The stories by Novik, Rollins, Ball, and Vaughn are pretty good. Stories by Hobb, Saylor, Weber, Morrell and Martin are okay.
Block's story is the most unique and scary in today's world. Lansdale's story is very funny. Williams and Haldeman's stories are furturistic, with Haldeman revisiting Forever Peace and focusing on sex. Rollins' story is about dog fighting. Martin continues the adventures of the Hedge Knight, which he started in Silverberg's Legend series.
If you like anthologies and Fantasy, then you will love Silverberg's Legend stories.
I first heard the narrator Lawlor, doing Jack Vance's Dying Earth book. He was good in that, as it involved elves, wizards and fairies. Whoever thought his little boy scout voice would be good doing Vikings or any tough guy, needs to find a new career. By reading the reviews you can tell he ruined it for many. I found it distracting and do believe I would have enjoyed reading the book better. The problem being it would have taken me months to read it, audible, even bad audible works so much better for me, especially long works like this.
Kudo's to Foster, Orci, Kurtzman and or Abrams. Whoever it is that is responsible for bringing back this series. These guys get it. They understand that what we like are the characters. The characters make the show, the movies and the books. In this book Kirk continues to show his hard headed, cheat if you have to side. Damn it Man, Doc is his cranky self. Scotty's character stands out in this one and I found him to be one of the most interesting members of the cast in this go around.
Without giving it away let me say they bring back a bad guy and a good guy. They do change the script a little, so sticklers for things being exact will not be happy. They have some references to Bradbury, Asimov and Clarke ( us old guys appreciate that). The story is a little weak, there are some things that just happen to happen the right way, but that is usual for movie books. I did not like this as much as the first Star Trek book by Foster, but the writing was still worth five stars.
What I don't understand is the narrator. First it is a female, second she is British. If you watched that series last fall on NBC, called The Neighbors, the good looking black alien, this narrator sounds exactly like her. Most of the characters as you know are male and this girl does not do good male voices. I am not against female narrators, I believe Kate Mulgrew would have done a good job. Her accent was very distracting at times. Sometimes Kirk was Kirk, but most of the time he was Kuck. McCoy and Spock had British accents. At times it was hard to figure out who was talking, almost everybody but Chekov and Scotty sounded alike. Spock emoted more then Kirk did, by her voice. Lots of times it sounded like a teen romance and I know that it was not the writing.
It is still worth five stars, it just could have been so much better.
THOSE MEAN REVIEWERS
It is amazing how attached we get to certain authors. Having read and loved, three great books by DB (Da Vinci Code, Angels and Demons, and Deception Point) and with Inferno just coming out, I thought I couldn't lose. Then I read the reviews and I could not believe how mean these arrogant reviewers were treating the Great Dan Brown. I took it personal. I figured they were spoiled and trying to be self important at Brown's expense. I would listen and write a scathing review on the reviewers. I have now noticed that one of those lengthy manifestos as been removed. Through the first twenty chapters I thought I was so in the right. The book really started out gang busters.
MISSION IMPOSSIBLE, INDIANA LANGDON, DR. PHIL, SOYLENT GREEN, OR SNAGGLEPUSS.
After a while I found my mind wondering. I found the mystery, not that mysterious. I was getting tired of the constant chasing and the I know something and I am not telling you stuff. Then the silliness set in. You know, like jumping out of an airplane without a chute and surviving. The book started to sound like an old episode of Mission Impossible, which was a good show in it's day, but watch it now and it's terrible. They brought up the old theme of overpopulation. This was a theme in the 50's and 60's and none of the things those fear mongers predicted came close to being true. I started to see all the staging for the movie, I almost expected to see blocking (Exit Stage Left Even). Langdon starts to want to father/love? a woman he has known for only a few hours. (Because she is beautiful, the smartest woman in the world and she is misunderstood.)
THE PLOT THINS
So like the plot in the book, my ability to lambast the reviewers did not happen.
There is some good stuff in this book. Brown is still a master at putting words together. You get a really cool tour of Florence. There is a little science, such as eugenics. The last couple of hours has so many twists and turns you will get dizzy.
Narrator is excellent
I strongly agree with David from Wisconsin. I believe that Bart does a better job with this subject then probably anyone else could. Several chapters are devoted to how this document was found and what happened to it after. Bart explains why this document is important and in layman's terms. He explains a lot about Gnostic teachings. At first this is fairly interesting, but later he goes into so much detail that I lost interest.
I did like the explanation about how people often combine the three Gospels, which in effect creates another gospel all together. All the gospels where written in a certain way to a certain group of people and to highlight a certain theology. When you combine them, it distorts the effect. I have narrated a lot of Easter programs for my church and have seen how that happens.
Gnostics seem to believe that the Old Testament God (Creator God) is not the same as the New Testament (Loving) God. This is an interesting concept, but from there it gets pretty weird. They seem to become the Anti-Church. They believe almost the opposite of what Christians believe.
Toward the end, Bart starts repeating himself and gets into thick details I lost interest in.
The narrator is so good, that I thought it was the author. Narrator is very comfortable to listen to.
This is not Agent to The Stars or Fuzzy Nation. It is not terrible, but if you are thinking you are going to get as funny or as good as the above mentioned then, sorry No.
In comparing Scalzi to Scalzi, I was a bit disappointed. At times I forget I was listening to Scalzi and thought I was Listening to Nora Roberts. This really gets bogged down in the details. The plot is fairly complicated and not in a good way. Warning to all, chapter six has a high Ick factor. I am talking sex with animals.
I did like Robin, she was a funny character. I liked the bowling shoes. I also liked the satire about L. Ron Hubbard.
Wil Wheaton was good, although at the beginning of the book he sounded a little tired. He might have been arguing with Sheldon all night. Will WHHHeeedon!
They Lose All Sense.
Another Five Star Novel, with a Five Star Performance by Ray Porter.
I will be the first to admit that this not as good as Patient Zero the first book in this series and even though you could read this book without reading that book, I believe you would be happier to read PZ first. PZ introduces you to Joe Ledger and to the Department of Military Sciences (X-Files on steroids). Some have given this less the five stars, the trap they have fallen into is that they are comparing Maberry to Maberry. That's like giving your second favorite book in the world three or four stars, cause it ain't as good as your favorite. Meaning only one book you have ever read could earn five stars. This book is still better then most of what is out there.
This is a Mad Scientist Novel (Mevil), no Zombies, but lots of genetic monsters.
Pro: Like a Koontz novel this filled with all kinds of creatures and bad guys. Here is a sample of what you will come across; Centaurs, Scorpion Dogs, Elves, The Chamber of Myths, Quetzalcoatl, Chinese Dragons, European Dragons, Sea Serpents, Gargoyles, The Hive, anti-aging gene, White Angel, mudpeople, transgenic soldiers, albino twins, life unworthy of life, extinction clock, Tigerhounds, clones, Neanderthals, New Men, unicorns, faith gene, and The Island of Dr. Moreau. The bad guys are cliche, Nazi's, Albinos and Russians, but in a book like this sometimes cliche is good. I lived for almost a year as a kid in Germany and went on vacation there almost two years ago and I love the German people, but you have to admit they make great bad guys. You may say that is politically incorrect, but you know you agree.
Con: I got sick and tired of the Extinction Clock. Every one of the 133 chapters starts with the Extinction Clock Countdown. It seemed to me that they kind of Wussied Ledger a little. He falls in love in this, he gets touchy feelie in parts, he less of a smart a@@ and he thinks before acting, something he didn't do in book 1. There are a couple of points where the book gets real patriotic in a patronizing way. There are a couple of duller then usual parts and the book seems a little unnecessarily stretched out. The epilogue is kind of stupid. Keep in mind we are comparing Ledger to Ledger, which sets the bar pretty high.
Ray Porter is great. I did notice in this book that Ray sounds an awful lot like Tom Hanks. I like Tom Hanks, so that is not a problem with me, it just seemed weird.
Since you can get these five books for one credit, go ahead and get it, instead of one book at a time. Believe me if you buy the first book, you are going to want the second and if you buy the second, etc. Since this is five books I will go over each, in case you buy one at a time. I will try an be brief. I mean if if takes you as long to read the review as the book, why not just get the book.
1, The Sword and The Stone (1938). This is the best of the five and is mostly a fantasy. Wart/Arthur is turned into several animals to learn about life. There is also an interesting part on boar hunting. Did you know on a boar spear there is a cross piece to keep the animal from running up the spear to get to you.
2.The Witch In the Wood (1939) This is shorter, darker and not as funny, nor as good as the book before and after, but necessary as it explains the origin of the Round Table.
3. The Ill-Made Knight (1940) This is all about Lancelot. You really get to know his character, matter of fact there is more character building in this book then the others. This is the longest of the books and actually goes on about three hours longer then it should have. Did you know that Lancelot was extremely ugly? This is one of the reasons he became such a great Knight. It is such a big part of his character I can't believe so many movies chose to make him some stupid Handsome Hunk. He is a lot more complicated as an Ugly Man. You are introduced to the tragic character Elaine, who starts out as a trickster, but who you end up feeling strongly sorry for. Guinvere turns out to be one horny queen.
4. The Candle in The Wind (1958) Does Might Mean Right is the common theme in all these books. It is especially in this one and the book has several long speeches. I myself as a child never understood why John Wayne won ever fight he was in. Until True Grit, John Wayne strongly believed he should never be killed in a movie. Heroes don't die and never lose fights. King Arthur's mother dies at the age of 70, in bed with a young man she seduced. In the original "Once and Future King" this was the last book, as it should have stayed.
5.The Book of Merlyn (1977) This was published after T.H. White's death. He wanted it in the original (Once and Future King), but the editor would not allow it. That was one smart editor. This book brought the whole series down from Five stars to Four. This book has no plot and is 97% anti-war speeches. There is a part where the King is turned into a ant and then into a goose. Those parts and the end which explains what finally happens to everybody are the only good parts to the book. This is mostly a debate where White argues both sides. I also am aniti-war, but no explanation is given about what to do about people like Hitler. White seems to say let him keep murdering Jews.
All in all this is very well written, is very entertaining and if you are a fan of the Legend of Arthur, then it is a must read.
The narrator is excellent.
I usually don't rush out to buy the newest hot book to come out. I let those I am following read first before I chance my money. Having loved Heart Shaped Box and Horns, I knew I did not need to wait on someone else to tell me this would be good. In my humble opinion this is the best Joe Hill has written yet.
I am sure JH gets tired of being compared to his dad, but having recently read "IT" by Stephen King I can not resist. I mentioned in that review that even though King throws a lot weird stuff and mean monsters at you, it's all just cover, to introduce you to some great flawed characters that you fall in love with. Hill has lots of weird things and mean scary monsters, but he mostly builds characters. You are scared, not because of the monsters, but because you don't want anything bad to happen to the people you have fallen in love with. All though I am not sure that I like the fact that in the book "It" you learn to hate clowns and then Hill ruins Christmas in this novel.
The bad guy is described as a bald Keith Richards with big blue veins covering his bald head. You learn in this book that: The blood of a red headed woman is three degrees colder then a normal woman. A cop does not want to pin a murder on the Gingerbread Man, cause word on the street is "You can't catch the gingerbread man".
Warning: The main difference between Hill and King, is that Hill uses very foul language, a lot worse then his dad would think of and if you read Heart-Shaped Box then you know that Hill is fixated on Blow J@@s. I hate to sound chauvinistic, but the stuff that comes out of the mouths of the women in this book made me cringe. I grew up around foul language and have worked around over the road truck drivers most of my life. If you were alright with Heart-Shaped box then you will be okay with this. Like I said I loved both books.
I hate nepotism, so I am in the position to dislike this author, but the talent of Joe Hill can not be denied. I have all his books in First Edition and plan on collecting everything he writes.
Now if you are not tired of me gushing like a little girl, let me remark on the narrator. I am in total awe of Kate Mulgrew. If you have read the hardback, you still want to get this audio. Nobody could have done a better job. She even does male voices better then some males. I am hoping like Muller and King were, so will be the team of Hill and Mulgrew. I don't know what they paid her but it was not enough.
What a rip off!! Gentleman save your money.
I liked Cuckold's Cabin by J.L Hugh, I love zombie books, so I thought what a great idea. A lot could have been done with this subject, but Hugh did nothing with it. If you were in the mood before you listened to this, then listening to this boring crap will get you out of that mood.
If you Joe Friday was to write porn, this is what it would be. Just the facts mam.
This is so poorly written and so uninspiring, I will probably never listen to another J.L. Hugh.
This is why you do not write a review until you have finished the book. Had I written the review at the end of ten chapters, I would have given it five stars. It starts out with this girl in prison. A prison where there is only a small window about fist size. The only light is through that window. She is fed maybe once a day. She has been in prison for nine months and has not spoken to anyone in that time. It kind of reminded me a little of Room by Donoghue. The language or vocabulary is different then any I have heard in any book: See Examples. When the story started to go down hill, which is when she is let out of this jail for another jail, I stayed with it for the flavor of Mafi's words. After about a third of the book is over, the story seems rushed, gets very predictable and even the tasty language which had been about every other sentence stops, with the exception of the semi-love scenes. With the exception of one line in the whole book(See Examples), the love scenes are very middle school. The bad guy is laughable. The book ends with a copy of X-Men.
Examples of Mafi's savory language; My words use no parachutes as they fall out of my mouth. I've discovered I don't know how to breathe. The bed under my back. My eyes are fighting not to flutter. I am going to memorize every inch of your body with my lips. I die stupid in that second.
I wish I could have written these down as I drove, they come at you every other sentence in the first half of the book. If Mafi ever writes an adult novel or erotica, I most assuredly want to read it. This book went from five stars to two stars faster then a speeding bullet and I have no interest in the rest of the series.
The narrator sounds like a ten year old girl, the girl is seventeen.
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