I would have Gilbert Gottfried narrate the entire thing. That would really take this craptacular audiobook to the next level - definitely. Seriously folks...I'm not even kidding - watch the clip of him reading selections of this on You Tube. Classic. Absolute claaaaassssssiiiiiicccc.
Only to people that can laugh at truly bad work that was meant to be taken seriously. In fact, get them all in a room together with copious amounts of alcohol and blast this audiobook. Make it a drinking game - take a shot every time Anastasia refers to her "inner goddess" or sputters "oh, my!" Take another shot every time creepy Grey "levels his intense (serial killer-like) gaze upon Anastasia". On second thought, don't - everyone will wind up dead from alcohol poisoning.
Let's see, was it Ms. Battoe's mind-numbingly dull and droning Valley Girl-esque delivery? Check. Could it be her even worse leaden vocal rendition of the rich-yet-menacingly-sexy sociopath that is Mr. Grey? Check that too. HIGH-LAR-I-OUS. Best yet, I love the fact that it's told in first person through Anastasia's character. In no time you'll be screaming to be let out of her brain. Help! Hellllppp! Someone get me out of here!!
Only to a very small percentage of the population that enjoys books and films meant to be taken seriously but can be enjoyed for all the wrong reasons. Just when you think Anastasia couldn't possibly be more knuckle-draggingly stupid...she manages to reach a new low. Every single time. Guaranteed! In fact, Anastasia Steel is such a cretin that I often wonder how this character could function in daily society. Oh yeah. She can't. It would all make more sense if her character suffered some kind of brain injury that would preclude her being this naive or possessing such a painful lack of cognitive skills with zero tolerance for self awareness.
Folks, this is just a symptom of a much, much bigger problem with the state of extremely successful books and films. Why do we support work that depicts all female leads in today's big hits (I'm looking at YOU, Hunger Games Automaton Catniss and Twilight Boneheaded Bella!) as completely blank maidens in distress that have absolutely no sense of self awareness or willingness to own their own sexuality, much less be completely unable to understand if and why a man finds them attractive, preferring to remain asexual robots until they're felt up or kissed unexpectedly?? Such is the sad state of female leads in books and films. If I didn't laugh, I'd have to give up books and films altogether. If this is considered the only socially acceptable form of porn for mommies, they should have higher standards. We should too.
I just loved “The Christmas Cave”.
Author David R. Bashears has written a novella that has a broad appeal not only for pre/tween/teens, but adults as well. The audio production, narrated by Dan Absalonson, sets the stage for an absorbing listening experience. His vocal performance is the perfect touch to this unique tale about siblings Jack and Amanda, as they are drawn into an daunting adventure fifty years in the making.
I appreciated genuinely not knowing where the plot would lead to next, and enjoyed the warm and compelling narration style Narrator Dan Absalonson provided throughout the production.
I highly recommend this audiobook to people searching for a unique tale in celebration of the power of family, friendships and the holiday spirit.
What a dark and absorbing production - I loved it!! Roland Yeoman's novel poses a frightening scenario - the concept of intelligent red blood cells turning against mankind. As Narrator, Hubert Williams' powerful character voice adds the perfect chilling mood to this thriller. Truly gave me chills!!
Another great collaboration between author Drac Von Stoller and narrator Dan Absalonson! All the elements - a good old-fashioned scary story, the skillful and nuanced vocal of the narration combined with the well-timed sound effects - combine for an audio thrill-ride!
"Grave Robbers" reminded me of old time radio theater for the modern age - sharp and absorbing from beginning to end. I love the seamless weaving of Drac Von Stoller's gritty, haunting prose coupled with Dan Absalonson's spot-on narration. The dark/moody music and accompanying sound effects add the perfect chilling touch to this top-notch production. This is a must have for all horror/suspense fans!
Engaging read, but I couldn't understand why the male lead was so contemptuous of the female protagonist. I could definitely understand from her point of view the frustration of dealing with a jerk of a boss, but the level of contempt Bennett seemed to have for her was alienating and unjustified.
This was unintentionally funny, because the narrator was simply out of her depth in reading an explicit memoir like this. Picture that recorded voice that welcomes you to the mall when you're given your ticket. Picture the recorded voice in the airport that tells you which zones are for loading and unloading. Now imagine that voice reading a dirty memoir. I don't know about you, but I laughed my ass off for the first ten minutes until i realized two things: the entire memoir will sound like this, and the sinking knowledge that I had wasted yet another precious credit...DAMN!!
If you're interested in learning about recording and tech issues from 70s era sound and recording equipment, then this is for you. If not (like me) you'll wish that you skipped this altogether. Yes, Caillat served as co-producer and trusted tech employee on the Rumours album as well as helping out on tech issues during the Rumours tour, but folks...this bears repeating: other than the aforementioned, you won't be learning anything new about Fleetwood Mac that you haven't already seen covered on an episode of VH1's "Behind the Music." I'm not kidding. This was a borefest of the highest degree. And, oh yes- did you know he's the father of singer Colby Caillat? That's good, because if you don't, you'll be reminded (in addition to a completely useless detailed description of how he handled a recording issue on his daughter's (Colby Caillat!) album. I wish someone would please kick me in the forehead with a pen for buying this damn thing.
Would you like to know what Caillat's days were like? (I woke up. I showered. Scooter went through the doggie door to go to the bathroom. Scooter came back in from the doggie door after he went to the bathroom, etc.) Holy crap- it's a monotonous nightmare. If this book was solely about his adventures with his dog Scooter, the best little buddy and tension breaker that made him happy during the recording sessions, that's one thing (I adore dogs)...but that's not how this was marketed. ("I ordered a drink. The waiter arrived. He poured the wine into my glass. I raised my glass. I made a toast." With hours upon hours worth of moment by moment description of every single thing he did every single day he worked on the album and subsequent tour, how in the hell did he have time to effectively do anything? He's too busy writing down every single boring everyday tasks he did, thought, etc. Frankly, if the book was about Scooter, the best pal Caillat ever had, it would have been far more interesting on the road with him and Scooter's adorable personality in the recording studio. That dog was interesting. Caillat wasn't. In spades.
Other than two major confrontations that take place during the Rumours recording sessions,I learned nothing. Just a lot of "the band seemed tense/the band knew exactly how much was at stake in making this album"...really? Ya don't say! Honestly, I felt that Caillat's reflections had about as much importance as a pimple on the ass of the universe.
By the way, is it just me, or does the narrator (although giving his best) sound like a voiceover actor for children's products/that happy voice at the end of the latest medicine commercial that happily warns you that one of the side effects is death? They should have had that warning at the beginning of this audiobook.
I really enjoy the voice of narrator Victor Bevine - he created distinct and very different voices for each one of the characters. I appreciated it.
Too many. The Johnson family history is packed with painfully sick individuals that took extreme joy in punishing/annihilating their family members. The ripple effect still affects the family to this day.
It gave me the opportunity to listen to Dodson's life without any sugar-coating. I have always respected the work she continues to do - breaking old myths about women and men's sexuality. I just had no idea about the hell she went through in the search just to be herself and question the old principles of sexual morality. To me, she comes across very much like a sex-ed astronaut from the future, plopped smack dab onto Earth with the sole mission of changing our attitudes about the double standards that women are confined to - even to this day! I think that the title was misleading because Dodson learned very early that she preferred not to become entangled in exclusive dating. She made a choice to remain steadfastly single, yet build a network of friends that understood and respected her life choice. It fueled her life, research, writing and art powerful because she experienced it all...with no regrets. Please note however that there are three incidents in the book that were triggering, so be forewarned.
What I liked best about this memoir was learning about her life-long struggle to teach herself (and others) not to be afraid of their own bodies, nor should there be any fear in speaking frankly with your partner to work together for greater intimacy. Also, there is nothing wrong with choosing not to marry/have kids, etc. for a life of free personal exploration and solitude.
Yes, I have. I'll be honest - at first, when I heard her voice, I distinctly thought that it was being narrated by one of Marge Simpson's sisters with a gravelly deep voice. Actually, I wound up appreciating it because Rosenblat's voice really does sound like Betty Dodson's voice! It was a very bold choice to have this narrated by an older woman with a powerful, booming voice instead of an annoying breathless ingenue. She captured the cadence and style of Dodson's voice spot-on. Lastly (but most importantly) the audiobook is narrated as if Dodson is right in front of you, sharing her life story with joy, humor and determination.
I had an extreme reaction toward the end that I never, ever expected to do- the relationship that Dodson had with her mother when she became an adult. It was precious and moving (I'm getting chills just remembering that section.) That relationship was such a source of support, laughter and mutual respect that I will never be able to listen to that passage without crying. It was incredibly moving. You'll be moved, too. Please read the emotional trigger alert below for more. This book is very polarizing and not for the faint of heart.
EMOTIONAL TRIGGER ALERT: Please be aware that the book delves briefly into childhood molestation, sibling incest and bestilality. Although Betty has a completely different opinion on how she chose to deal with her childhood, there's no doubt that it will certainly open up a contentious debate. The bestiality incident she witnessed - no matter how many protestations to the contrary that the animal was never hurt/raped, just "spoiled" and "loving" left me infuriated and disgusted. No matter how brief the aforementioned incidents were, it doesn't take away the anger I had about these incidents.
No. No. Please no.
Anything but this!
They all come across as exactly the same- the narrator obsessively whines about every facet of every gal pal that she's ever had- it's no wonder the friendships didn't work out
Pleaase folks, don't waste your time!!
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