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Ted

Don't know what I want to be when I grow up. Trip's cool though. Use Audible to make gym-training sane... And rip my imagination.

Lancaster, PA, United States | Member Since 2010

779
HELPFUL VOTES
  • 242 reviews
  • 316 ratings
  • 612 titles in library
  • 90 purchased in 2014
FOLLOWING
4
FOLLOWERS
113

  • Native Tongue

    • UNABRIDGED (15 hrs and 57 mins)
    • By Carl Hiaasen
    • Narrated By George Wilson
    Overall
    (578)
    Performance
    (281)
    Story
    (289)

    Ex-reporter Joe Winder had been working in the public relations department of a sleazy family entertainment park, The Amazing Kingdom of Thrills, when he chanced upon a news-breaking story inspired by the disappearance of two blue-tongued voles and the bizarre death of Orky, the killer whale.

    Tricia - Audible says: "A Perfect Summer Listen!"
    "Silly... If You Want That... This Is Your Book..."
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    I'm torn, this story falls into one of two types... (1) It is was ordered up by the people who create Chelsea Grammar screenplays so that the star can sell his reputation for the most bucks quick until eventually everyone who might have attended decides, "Fool me once... shame on you.. But fool me twice and well, I feel gypped." or (2) It's one of those "Famous Writing Academy" classroom exercise where the manuscript is passed to another student after his predecessor wrote a chapter.

    Okay, in both cases, some talented people might flack out the next scene or chapter, but their reward's going to come from a teacher or producer, not from anyone who actually pays money for the thing. No wonder that the longest chapter in Native Tongue is the epilogue which has to fill more holes than come woven into a Florida window-screen. I didn't hate this thing... But the word "disappoint" sparks to mind fast as a Bic's flame.

    Once upon a time I reeeeeeely enjoyed Carl Hiaasen. I guess he got used to the income supplement from books and figures its also a way to wrap something around his nature rants. Hell, maybe the rants let him sleep at night? Certainly it can't be authorial pride anymore. Sigh... Skip this one, K?

    2 of 4 people found this review helpful
  • Death at Charity's Point

    • UNABRIDGED (8 hrs and 41 mins)
    • By William G. Tapply
    • Narrated By Stephen Hoye
    • Whispersync for Voice-ready
    Overall
    (21)
    Performance
    (21)
    Story
    (21)

    Brady Coyne never meant to become the private lawyer to New England’s upper crust, but after more than a decade working for Florence Gresham and her friends, he has developed a reputation for discretion that the rich cannot resist. He is fond of Mrs. Gresham - unflappable, uncouth, and never tardy with a check - and he has seen her through her husband’s suicide and her first son’s death in Vietnam. But he has never seen her crack until the day her second son, George, leaps into the sea at jagged Charity’s Point.

    Ted says: "Stinko!"
    "Stinko!"
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    What a tiresome…

    Imagine living next door to a beginning bagpipe student. There will not be a happy ending, right? Or middle, or probably not a beginning worth enduring. Hey I paid for this Charity Point thing and kept listening , hoping it'd become minutely as fascinating as Lawrence Sander's Archie McNally. But nooooooooo. It just kept on droning through a tedious plot more improbable than a Victoria's Secret angel looking for love at a soup kitchen.

    Yeah, I get it that William Tappley writes the ideas of authors who have ideas in a number of collaborations. Some of that sort of "collaborative" work drones like the noise from a freshman bagpiper's nozzles and bladder. I guess it was a combined loss of ideas and lack of creative discipline that caused this novel to annoy me.

    Tapply may be good at ghost writing, here his corpus is less substantial than a ghost.

    Avoid this thing even though Stephen Hoye works hard to sell it.

    4 of 4 people found this review helpful
  • Rogue Code: A Jeff Aiken Novel

    • UNABRIDGED (11 hrs and 29 mins)
    • By Mark Russinovich
    • Narrated By Johnny Heller
    • Whispersync for Voice-ready
    Overall
    (294)
    Performance
    (276)
    Story
    (276)

    Michael Lewis’ Flash Boys revealed how high-frequency trading has created a ruthless breed of traders capable of winning whichever way the market turns. In Rogue Code, Mark Russinovich takes it one step further to show how their grip on high finance makes the stock market vulnerable to hackers who could bring about worldwide financial collapse.

    Ted says: "This Will Probably Happen."
    "This Will Probably Happen."
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    See, Mark Russinovich is the ubber-geek who can speak colloquial English.

    You know like meeting a space alien who talks like he came from Philly. He can explain so that I can suddenly mutter… "Good God! We're all in a LOT of trouble."

    Here he digs into the space where computer security meets VERY VERY VERY Big Money. And he explains exactly what opportunity (or threat) lurks between the left scissor edge of computer engineering and the right edge of international financial transaction.

    First I'm warning you NOT TO LISTEN TO THIS BOOK… first. Go get Russinovich's "Zero Day" first. Because you probably will after you hear this novel. And since it's a continuing ensemble cast, hey… why not enjoy all of the feelings and back-stories as they grow through Mark's second novel, "Trojan Horse" (and his best), and then come here to Rogue Code?

    Johnny Heller does a terrific job. I was disappointed though with the Jeff Aiken (hero) - Darlyl Haugen (demoted heroine) relationship's direction. They were so much more interesting twin parts of whole lead character in Zero Day and Trojan Horse. The altered path seemed like some sort of personality-ectomy. Hope the partnership gets renewed.

    Oh yeah, that teaser up above… The Steven-King-terror-inducing-talent of Mark Russinovich is that what his stories tell-about will escape from his cloud and will probably happen quite soon, maybe tomorrow. YIPES!

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  • The Boyfriend

    • UNABRIDGED (8 hrs and 41 mins)
    • By Thomas Perry
    • Narrated By Robertson Dean
    • Whispersync for Voice-ready
    Overall
    (612)
    Performance
    (523)
    Story
    (520)

    Jack Till, who has retired from the LAPD after a respected career as a homicide detective, now works as a private investigator, comfortable chasing down routine cases while visiting his 24-year-old daughter, Holly, who has Down Syndrome. But when the parents of a recently murdered young girl, about Holly's age, ask for his help when the police come up empty, Till reluctantly takes the case.

    Opule says: "Typical Thomas Perry"
    "Take An Idea. Do it, then rethink it… Interesting"
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    The Boyfriend is derivative of Thomas Perry.

    I ask artists this question, "How much of a final work is created in the process as opposed to whatever concept you brought to the project at the start". Their average answer, "A whole bunch. The inmates take over the asylum early on."

    Ever played the game, "Imagine how history would have changed if…. (fill in the tiny change… like someone jostled John Wilkes Booth shooting hand). Imagine the options… the paths… And that's what happens to an artist during process… Forking pathways are discovered and one is chosen over the other.

    And yet… What if the author-artist could go back to that pathway to make the other choice? The Boyfriend exists in a universe that's parallel to other Perry stories. In it he takes one of his most complex bad-guy's essence and bends his presence to a totally different world.

    Perry is such a talented story teller, and Roberstson Dean a gripping audio artist, that even though you think you've been this way before… you'll notice that both the scenery and destination become way, way different.

    Perry's one of the best.

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  • Illegal Alien

    • UNABRIDGED (9 hrs and 42 mins)
    • By Robert J. Sawyer
    • Narrated By Joe Barrett
    • Whispersync for Voice-ready
    Overall
    (158)
    Performance
    (140)
    Story
    (143)

    When a disabled spaceship enters Earth's atmosphere, seven members of the advanced Tosok race are welcomed by the world. Then a popular scientist is murdered, and all evidence points to one of the Tosoks. Now, an alien is tried in a court of law -and there may be far more at stake than accounting for one human life.

    Joyce E McBride says: "What more could you want?"
    "Like a haute stew!"
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    Is it a murder mystery? How'zabout a "what are those weird aliens up to anyway" mystery? Or no… perhaps its a dig into a "BIG QUESTION" or two? Well, like a swell stew, this Sawyer novel – it be all a dem tings.

    But do you think of stew AND haute cuisine? Not so much. But it's still good.

    Look, you ever get a tune stuck in your head? Well Robert Sawyer writes his tales like the insidiously talented folks who compose pesky head-sticking music. He stays with you. And you stay right back.

    Illegal Alien is about murder-solving, mysterious intentions, and even a big question Which is driven by anatomical-deterimination of all things. It'll stick in your head. Joe Barrett is in the top league of audio artists. He stays there throughout Illegal Alien.

    I liked it. I'm gonna' go now and shop for another Sawyer listen. Bye...

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  • Missing You

    • UNABRIDGED (11 hrs and 46 mins)
    • By Harlan Coben
    • Narrated By January LaVoy
    Overall
    (1830)
    Performance
    (1617)
    Story
    (1627)

    Number-one New York Times best-selling author Harlan Coben set huge sales records with last year’s Six Years - and he’s poised to do it again in his next breathtaking stand-alone thriller. Harlan Coben, author of six consecutive instant number-one New York Times best sellers and a total of 24 award-winning, best-selling, and internationally acclaimed novels, returns with another ripped-from-real-life thriller full of impossibly high emotional stakes and the real-to-life characters for which he has become famous.

    Susan says: "I Ain't Missing You"
    "A hair more romance than mystery..."
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    Harlan Coben is a powerful craftsman. Is he an artist? Hmmmm… Not here, no - and if you're looking for insightful literature, better go download some Tolstoy, Fitzgerald, or Wolfe. Nope, no great questions asked or answered. No cultural depths plumbed.

    Instead Coben holds your attention the way a dark suit grabs cat hair. The heroin is, of course, a woman sodden with an 18 year old unrequited love. Why is it that heroines are love sodden and heros guilt ridden? It's the nature of commercial mystery clichés, eh? Stereotypes that sell.

    Anywayzzz…. January LaVoy is brand new on my list of smoking audio actresses. She allowed me to suspend disbelief in the parade of coincidences that made twin plots intertwine - both as tightly - yet unnaturally in their contrivance, - as a cheerleader's plaited pig tails.

    The ending… so important to every one of these things… was acceptable, tied up the strands that skipped their traces, and worked well enough for this genre. Look, I enjoyed Missing You. I recommend it to sedate you through a tough gym workout, or a boring commute. I'll keep buying Coben's books.

    Nuff said, right?

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  • Ties That Bind

    • UNABRIDGED (9 hrs and 24 mins)
    • By Phillip Margolin
    • Narrated By George Guidall
    Overall
    (83)
    Performance
    (26)
    Story
    (26)

    On the outside, Amanda Jaffe has healed from the traumatic events that concluded the sensational New York Times best seller Wild Justice, but inside, she's struggling to regain her self-assurance. When she is forced to represent a pimp accused of murder (a case no other lawyer will touch), her client threatens her, strirring up the trauma to such an extent that she must finally seek the help of a psychiatrist.

    William says: "Good Book!"
    "Stinko!"
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    Adequate characters, and the writer had craft BUT, this "story" stinks! I have never been so disappointed with the way a writer ended a plot. He betrays the reader with one narrative, then inserts an incongruous, entirely different storyline that assumes the reader is a dolt! Margolin appears to have contempt for his readers, assuming we accept any twaddle that let's him write, "The End" when it's obvious that he's grown tired of the entire thing.

    I worried about getting this book after the way Margolin's "Wild Justuce" fell apart at the end, but I enjoyed some of his ensemble enough to try "Ties That Bind". Boy am I sorry. Margolin's needs to become a ghost writer for someone who has plot ideas, his just evaporate in the end.

    Don't buy this thing, even with George Guidal, it was - in the end - Un-saveable! Stinko!

    5 of 5 people found this review helpful
  • Trojan Horse: A Jeff Aiken Novel, Book 2

    • UNABRIDGED (10 hrs and 50 mins)
    • By Mark Russinovich, Kevin Mitnick (foreword)
    • Narrated By Johnny Heller
    • Whispersync for Voice-ready
    Overall
    (432)
    Performance
    (387)
    Story
    (393)

    It’s two years after the Zero Day attacks, and cybersecurity analyst Jeff Aiken is reaping the rewards for crippling AlQaida’s assault on the computer infrastructure of the Western world. His company is flourishing, and his relationship with former government agent Daryl Haugen has intensifiedsince she became a part of his team. But the West is under its greatest threat yet. A revolutionary, invisible trojan that alters data without leaving a trace has been identified, roiling international politics.

    Ted says: "5 STARS: Russinovich Is Tranformative"
    "5 STARS: Russinovich Is Tranformative"
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    Somewhere in the middle of “hunt For Red October it clicked. “Yoa!” I thought, “This is a new something… a genre… if not a new species, well at least a new breed.” So I read the next 16 (or was that 18?) Clancys… Until somewhere in “Shadow Warriors”, or perhaps “Search and Destroy” he lost his power to fly the class he created (and never recovered them in his own attempts at cyber-fiction).

    “Trojan Horse” goes “CLICK!” Mark Russinovich has accomplished where Neil Stephenson and the aging Clancy failed. Issac Asimov argued that if science did not drive the plot, it was not "science" fiction, but fiction in drag. Clancy at his best did the same thing with his techno-fiction where a sort of electro/mechanical engineering drove the plot. Russinovich’s transformational technology-driver has done to Clancy’s breed what the internet has done to newspapers… This is a disruptive book.

    While “Zero Day”, the first in this Jeff Aiken/Daryl Hagen series, was engrossing –Russnovich was experimenting with his powers. I enjoyed it, and recommend that you read or listen to it before starting this book since it explains the allusions to that story peppered through “Trojan Horse”. But while each of these books are VERY commercial and crammed-full with action (cinematic is the word that comes to mind), Russinovich is sucking on the cyber-pipe full-on here in “Trojan Horse”.

    BTW, this is NOT a Jeff Aiken book. While it’s a partnership, Daryl Hagen is now the stronger member of this pair. I hope someone at Audible will fix that in the series description.

    Johnny Heller does a fine, if not masterful, job of presenting this work even if his characters are incompletely nuanced. Still, I won’t do anything to pull all five stars away from “Trojan Horse”. It’s as masterful as “DaVinci” code in its story telling clout yet "cyber"-fiction in the Asimov sense.

    This is a cross-over novel that every adventure/mystery lover can enjoy and the best adventure book I’ve listened to in years.

    6 of 6 people found this review helpful
  • Collision

    • UNABRIDGED (11 hrs and 41 mins)
    • By Jeff Abbott
    • Narrated By Phil Gigante
    • Whispersync for Voice-ready
    Overall
    (53)
    Performance
    (35)
    Story
    (34)

    Collision is the story of two men living very different lives - one, a successful corporate consultant who is mourning the murder of his new bride; the other, a former CIA agent known only as "Pilgrim", whose current assignment for a fringe espionage agency is so treacherous he doesn't trust even his own boss. When they are thrown together in a violent, unexpected event, the two men realize that they've been framed in an elaborate setup.

    Ted says: "Action Without Adventure"
    "Action Without Adventure"
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    Maybe this was a first novel? Nope, this is what Abbott does all the time I guess. Anorexic characterization that's much fatter than the plot. If you believe any of this tale, hey… I've got a pair of bridges that are totally cheap… lemme know, K? It reminded me of the early summer blockbuster movies… Back in the 70s… The ones that were all shoot-em-up car chases. Fine for the times, but un-viewable today. This story wouldn't get green-lighted for cable TV.

    I stopped listening three times, but finally,with nothing else on my iPod and a long gym workout to fill… it got finished with an ending that was unexpected as a baby's birth gender after a first trimester ultrasound.

    Maybe this is aimed at prepubescent reading-challenged males? Actually I'm thinking that the interminable action scenes may have been assignments to the author in a creative writing class that he sort ran back to back without bothering to imagine a story for glue?

    Phil Gigante made a buck here, probably deserved, not so much for his performance which is OK, but for his tenacity in reading "Collision".

    3 of 3 people found this review helpful
  • The Drop: Harry Bosch, Book 17

    • UNABRIDGED (11 hrs and 26 mins)
    • By Michael Connelly
    • Narrated By Len Cariou
    Overall
    (3231)
    Performance
    (2636)
    Story
    (2606)

    Harry Bosch has been given three years before he must retire from the LAPD, and he wants cases more fiercely than ever. In one morning, he gets two. DNA from a 1989 rape and murder matches a 29-year-old convicted rapist. Was he an eight-year-old killer, or has something gone terribly wrong in the new Regional Crime Lab? Then Bosch and his partner are called to a death scene fraught with internal politics....

    Joanne says: "A completely satisfying listen"
    "It's BOGO Bosch!"
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    Pay for one, get two Harry Bosch novels entwined here in "The Drop" AND…. a bridge to Connelly's next Bosch… "The Black Box"! Plus this is totally great Michael Connelly. Here Harry goes puzzling-out the mysteries of a "Splatter" who's found seven stories below his penthouse terrace while Bosch's also working through the mindset of a pedophile who's got an astonishing alibi as a suspect in a rape/murder.

    Of course both cases are cemented together with procedural detail and cop-politics. Connelly's never been better, nor has Michael McConnohie. As usual, I recommend you start Bosch from the beginning of this epic series to capture all the whorls and whims of Connelly's imagination, but hey… If you just want to start your Bosch experience somewhere…

    Drop in here…

    3 of 3 people found this review helpful
  • No Time for Goodbye

    • UNABRIDGED (10 hrs and 52 mins)
    • By Linwood Barclay
    • Narrated By Christopher Lane
    • Whispersync for Voice-ready
    Overall
    (289)
    Performance
    (162)
    Story
    (165)

    The house was deathly quiet. That was the first sign that something was terribly wrong. Fourteen-year-old Cynthia Bigge woke that morning to find herself alone. Her family - mother, father, and brother - had vanished without a word, without a note, without a trace. Twenty-five years later, Cynthia is still looking for answers. Now she is about to learn the devastating truth.

    S. Johnston says: "I truy enjoyed this book!"
    "Schmucks!"
    Overall
    Performance
    Story

    Every male (I can't use the word "man") in NTFG is built around a spine that's wispier than stuff Victoria's Secret uses to make panties. Think of the word "manly" then think of its most extreme opposite. There, you've described every male character in this book.

    Actually the mystery here is interesting, and adequately worked out. But these panty-waist guys are so weak… no "weak" is to these creatures is like using the word "dull" to describe Uncle Dan's family slide show. Barclay's women are shrews, his males pansies and this story what happens when the word man is surgically separated from the word testosterone.

    As for Christopher Lane… I guess this was work. We all need to make a buck, and this chore was probably better than digging ditches in winter during a storm.

    5 of 5 people found this review helpful

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