Despite the title, the book didn't dispel the myth for me that charisma can be learned. If you've read articles or books on public speaking, you'll find many of the same recommendations in this book -- be authentic, really listen to people, be willing to be vulnerable and reveal something personal about yourself, practice and visualize your presentations, and mirror the person whom you want to build a rapport. There were a few suggestions that were new for me: divide and conquer (convince your detractors separately, not when they're all together in a big, important meeting), dress well and comfortable (look good but not go overboard that you're uncomfortable and give off negative body language), and reframe stressful situations into positive ones (such as instead of thinking about how you might mess up a presentation, think about how you got this assignment because your boss has such confidence in your abilities).
While the author may have helped her clients become charismatic, I don't think it's something that can simply be learned from a book. It probably requires a coach understanding what you're facing and giving advice that specifically address your problems. If charisma could be gained through authentically wanting to connect with the person, listening intently, and mirroring, we would have learned it in high school.
The good and bad thing about this audiobook is that the most important tips & techniques are given right away, at the beginning. The descriptions of charisma as "warmth, presence, and power" were extremely helpful. I think about that all the time now. But the rest of the audio was basic, such as how to make eye contact, listen, and shake hands. Scattered throughout, there were some good tips on monitoring the pace and intonation of your voice. I just wish there had been more elaborate descriptions on how people perceive one another and maybe subtleties within the three "warmth, presence, power"... She does discuss combinations of the 3 and encourages people to make use of their "natural" talents rather than feeling like they have to be all things to all people.
Book starts out with solid information about Charisma. But ends up being a compilation of good advice about emotional intelligence in general. In the middle of the book I lost interest because there was nothing really new.
I feel as though some of the information in this book is a little robotic and unnatural. I fully admit that doing any kind of new activity is going to feel a little unnatural at first but this is to a strange extreme. For instance the author suggests living life at times "method acting". This is where a person thinks of a scene which brings up feelings that you want to convey. For instance, if you want to convey warmth, think about something before hand that makes you feel the feelings of warmth. This to me is phony.
There are however very good and extremely practical applications which can be easily done without feeling fake. An example would be to take a full second or two before speaking to ensure that you absorb what the other person is saying. That isn't being fake, that is just good, common people skills.
For the reason that the book is scattered with some hints of genuinely good advice and applications, I don't give the book a terribly negative review. This book however is by no means perfect. I don't like criticizing but if you go to the books website and watch the author speak, she kind of lacks the very same warmth she purports to be able to project. I think this has to do with the fact that in the book she talks about deciding which kind of charisma to turn on and which ones to turn off. She was probably trying to turn on the "authority charisma" and turn everything else down... but I just don't buy it. I didn't see it working from her and I frankly can't see it working for me. The most charismatic people are the ones who are most interested in other people, genuinely. That in mind, go read the go-giver or the go-giver sells more. Not as much science, not as many hours but all of it is solid, good, applicable advice.
Say something about yourself!
I like the different ways to increase your charisma.
Nice voice- easy listening
People have noticed positive change in me.
Amazing Book. This book breaks down how we can fix certain self-sabotaging thoughts and behaviors. This book will grow your confidence, self-esteem, and re-duce stress. Really an effective life changing book.
Everyone should have this book. It is a fun read and truly beneficial. And guess what once you pick this book up you will read it...unlike the other self-help books you eventually give up on.
The plus is that the speaker's got a great voice, fun to listen to! Some opportunities: It would be helpful is the speaker offered sign posts when moving to a new section by pausing before starting it. In a written book, we can see the headers; not so, in an audio. Also it's really annoying that the reference is to "the box below". Why not ask the author/performer to modify the audiobook edition to that the speaker talks through the sidebars? I noticed in Bill OReilly's books, he makes small modifications ("in this audiobook, we'll discuss xyz"). Finally, and most importantly, the author emphasizes the importance of completing various worksheets. Why not make the worksheets easily downloadable for audio book listeners.
GK Chesterton (or maybe CS Lewis) said we need to be reminded of what we know more than we need to be taught something new. Many of these concepts are things we all know ... the reminder of their importance is invaluable!
Not sure!! I would have loved to have a workbook so that I could get the most out of it.
I have already applied some of the insights and it works. I have people telling me how warm I am and they keep asking me if I am the manager for my sales region.
Get it and follow the advice.
Great book, incredibly insightful. I found myself finally understanding specifically where I have gone wrong in the past with interpersonal relationships. I am in the process of listening to it a second time.
Greetings. My brother introduced me to Audible in 2011. Since, nothing but enjoyment. Hopefully my reviews are very useful to you. Enjoy!
Yes. This book is loaded with valuable information for anyone that wants to be secure about themselves.
Everything. This book builds you to be the proffesional you want to be.
Clear pronouncation and proffesional demeanor.
Yes and no. Too much to absorb in one setting however the ah ha moments never stop so it's hard to sit this book down.
This is the best book I've ever had. It combines professional tips along with science. So many tips on tricking your brain to perform how you need it to perform to appear competent and accomplish your goals. Buy this book TODAY it isn't an option! Unless, you want to remain a little fish in the big pond.