I'm an Extrovert married to an Introvert and I didn't understand him at all! This book helped me understand him and his style of communicating.
I learned that Introverts really can't think on their feet like we Extroverts do. In a conversation I cannot pressure my husband - I need to be more patient and give him time to process in his own way.
I learned about how to understand and deal with Introverts.
Thought I would learn a lot about communicating with introverts. Not what this book's about. It's to make real introverts feel justified and even good about themselves. (I never thought we shouldn't!)
The modern world is one that rewards assertive, extroverted, and (lets face it) aggressive people. The author makes the argument that 1/3 to 1/2 of the people in the world are introverted: and more importantly, we need them.
The book does the somewhat obvious by telling us how important the quiet folks are, especially in a world where technology makes the face-to-face interactions a little less important.
More helpful is the rest of the book: how does a quiet person interact with the world? How do you "fake" being an extrovert when needed? How do you manage quiet employees? How do you help your quiet child interact in the loud world?
From discussion about the physiological reasons for introversion, to monitoring (and modifying) this behavior in order to function in the extroverts world.
A great book for those looking to understand and appreciate the introverted person, whether it be yourself or another person in your life.
Gee, when you talk about discrimination you have to talk about introverts as major victims.
All along we know that we're just who we are, but at some point fighting back is not worth the effort, so let's just relax with a good book and do other things by ourselves such as drawing, playing music, inventing, cooking, creating, thinking........
Susan did a fantastic job selling the fact that being a "quiet" one is perfectly normal for those that are. Honestly, the jerks and cretins I had to deal with from childhood, long into adulthood were just jerks and cretins. (I don't care if I offended anyone).
This book should be required reading for everyone, especially parents who suspect that something may be wrong with their "quiet" children.
Yes, I'm a little hostile about it. The book definitely brings back childhood memories of some of the closed minded neanderthals who bought into the "extroverts rule" thing and treated me like a maladjusted mental dwarf.
I'd like to see Susan do a sequel wherein rather than siting so many studies, she interviews a spectrum of introverts and thus exposes more of the potentially damaging the "extroverts rule" mentality is. Further, I'd like to read about more studies that address the relative IQ's of introverts vs. extroverts.
In my case, it wasn't until I was in my early 30's that I learned that I have an "out-of-the-park" IQ. While I often say and truly believe that IQ is over rated, it does have some comparative values. I'm one of those who was assumed to be of below average intelligence and thus assigned to remedial classes in public school. Fortunately, I got past that garbage and eventually proved the culprits wrong. Especially dishonorable mention goes to my relatives who thought my life would be spent wearing a dunce cap and never a mortarboard and tassel of a university.
Thanks again Susan.
Susan Cains in-depth research and obvious passion for her subject. I gave it four rather than five stars because it got a somewhat repetitive about 3/4 of the way through.
There is a shorter book in a similar vein called "Introvert Power". It isn't anywhere near as exhaustively researched but if the subject interests you it's a good, quick read.
Susan Cain's Ted talk is worth watching as well.
Have achieved significant success in business and personal life through self-help & education books.
warm inspiring brave
the story-teller makes it that much enjoyable. Her tone of voice is what you can right away comfortably associate with an introvert person, which makes you feel that this person indeed knows what she is talking about.
I would recommend it, but would mention that there are some biases and at times a political agenda. Take it for what you can get out of it, but be careful not to accept it entirely as fact.
This book has a lot of valuable information and gave me a better understanding of such topics as introversion and what it means to be a sensitive person. There are times that the author's biases come out, and even her own political views on some topics. I happen to disagree completely with some of the things she included in the book based upon my own understanding of evidence. However, I did appreciate the vast majority of the material presented and of the science and psychology she presented, when she stayed on the true topic at hand. I feel it would have been better had she not included her political and personal digressions and excluded her personal biases and judgments of some individuals and unrelated topics. These were small portions and only slightly distracting to me. Overall, I felt the book has value and I learned a great deal from it.
Reading about an introvert's perspective on Tony Robbins. It was fascinating to hear the author's perspective on attending one of his conferences and how she completely processes just about every sensory input in the opposite way.
The part of the book where the author described parents who thought their kids were "defective" because they were not extroverted. It shows how our society is biased against introversion.
This book really opened my mind to introversion. I am an extrovert and have often held the same biases against introverts as other extroverts. It helped me to understand why people are introverted, why they are quiet, and how they still change the world. It has greatly enhanced my capability to interact with introverts and have much more productive relationships with them.
I loved the author's reliance on RESEARCH, something that is hardly ever overused nowadays.
The research finding that introverts and extroverts have, on average, the same amount of good ideas. Just that extroverts, because of their nature, are more likely to be heard.
The book's an all-around poignant, well-argued statement (and question) on our society's ill-advised and over-rated reliance on all things extroverted.