Provides a useful insight into how we and others perceive and experience relationships.
Practical examples to idnetify key patterns of thinking and relating
world traveler, on the move, creating, really enjoying hand free books!
Really great listen! It gave me a lot to think about. It also helped me be able to understand other people in my life. From family and friends to lovers.
This book gave me so much understanding about human communication I am so amazed at how helpful it was.
No this is my first one.
All of it - I just keep listening to it every week or so.
Thank you! Is there any follow up books on the same topic?
I have found the concepts described in this book to be very practical and immediately useful. It includes checklists that make the ideas very concrete and directly applicable to individual situations. Essentially, it picks up where books like "He's Just Not That Into You" leave off. It gives the why.
You won't regret listening to this if you are even a little bit interested in this topic.
Both practical and backed up by studies.
Highlight of the book are the immediately useful checklists.
The narrator is very good. The only minor quibble I have is that the book is slightly repetitious.
Yes, I would recommend. It's a fairly simple and easy yet interesting way to look at relationship and adjust your expectation of other people as well as yourself.
This book is a helpful tool for anyone in an intimate relationship. The analysis of the different attachment styles gives a new perspective on common relationship conflicts. It makes a point of helping the listener get into the mindset of the different attachment styles so they might be better able to identify and react to attachment styles of romantic partners. It also offers useful advice for dealing with insecure attachment styles.
The book seemed to be very sympathetic to the anxious attachment style. It frames behavior that is typically looked down upon in a more reasonable manner and allows the listener to empathize. The whole time you feel sorry for anxious types but this does have the effect of vilifying avoidant types.
Clear easy to listen to narration.
The book is educational and interesting but not particularly emotional. There are some anecdotes where you might feel sorry for one of the people and there is a lot of negative attention paid to avoidants but it is not meant to be a roller coaster.
If I didn't know any better I'd think this book was written by anxious types for anxious types. It treats avoidant types as misanthropic predators who prey on the vulnerable anxious types. It makes a very strong point in the beginning claiming it is not judging the attachment styles as good or bad but it is very clearly painting the avoidant type as something to be avoided at all costs.
This book really opened my eyes about attachment
Very helpful in relationships
Understanding the different attachment types
This book made the subject of adult attachment easy to understand and then use in every day life. Understanding the attachment mechanisms will definately help develop strong relationships either personally or professionally. It was an easy listen and I can't wait to apply what I've learned.
I found this book very enlightening. Once you start thinking about relationships in this way, it makes some of the day-to-day arguments a lot easier to avoid.
After listening to this, part of me suspects that "anxious" and "avoidant" types are just two sides of the same coin -- people who are insecure about relationships and have different kinds of defense mechanisms. I wonder this especially because I have seen someone who seems to be "avoidant" flip to "anxious" when she is in a relationship with another "avoidant" type.
It's hard to believe that "secure" types are really in the majority, because it seems like there are so few of them around, either in popular media or in my day-to-day life. Maybe "secure" is not a type at all, but a way of interacting with others that shows that you have learned to let go of your defenses a bit and interact more maturely.
The authors don't seem to agree with me on these points, and suggest for most of the book that people don't change their basic attachment style, though they suggest in some places that people can learn to be more secure. Maybe they simplified things into a typology to make this theory easier for a general reader to understand, but it left me with a lot of unanswered questions.
In terms of romantic relationships, I have always assumed that there are two kinds of people, which turned out to be known as the anxious and the avoidant people according to this life-saving book, and I thought that I belonged to the first category. Because I blamed myself for being anxious, I did not want to have relationships with other anxious people (one was enough, I thought); and though I did was not a fan of the avoidant type of people, I thought, for lack of a better choice, I preferred to mate with an avoidant person.
After This book entered my life, however, I realize now that I have another choice, another possibility, a new hope! There is a whole new category of people of whose existence I was not aware, but secretly wanted to believe: the secure people. This was hu-u-u-ge comfort to me.
Also, the book helped me to accept myself and see that my sensitivity was not disfunction (as the avoidant people I realized I was surrounded with used to force me to believe).
Thank you all (writers, directors, publishers, featured people, narrator [Walter Dixon’s voice was a delight to hear]) for this book. I love myself more now, and I have hope.