This book gives fascinating insight into the three types of adult attachment styles.
If you've ever wondered why long-term relationships are difficult for you to maintain the answer may be inside. Odds are you fit into one of the three attachment styles and your partner fits into another. The book will provide advice for making your particular styles work together and moving yourself and your significant other toward a more compatible dynamic.
In terms of writing style the book is a bit clinical. Parts of it read more like a masters thesis than a self-help book. Overall, though, I found this extremely helpful.
Show me the credits!!!! :)
This audiobook was one that I was skeptical at first to get, but glad I did. The dynamics between people are always fascinating and fun to inspect, almost like walking through life with a different pair of shades on. Everything is reevaluated with the perspective of what you have just learned. This book seems to be the foundation of every interaction you have. If you think about it's core concepts the author illustrates, people's actions don't seem as strange. Everything seems to make more sense and it's not that big of a leap to understand. This is worth the credit and learning about, if not for the fun little factoids inside.
Dr. Levine presents some useful insight into relationship difficulties with anxious and avoidant type personalities. I found it educational and affirming. If you are doubting yourself and your decision to stay or leave a relationship listen to audio book.
Yes, I recommend this book to everyone!
The information in this book should be taught as a college course to anyone who wants to become a therapist or marriage counselor.
Way worth the money or credit...don't wait...GET IT! It's changed my life.
I have recommended this book to friends. This book provided a nice balance between research and practice. It explained what attachment looks like in adults and how it plays out in relationships by providing a multitude of case examples. I really liked how the authors also shared how to understand your own attachment style and improve your ability to communicate and attach to others.
They weaved together case examples to illustrate the principles they were explaining.
Pleasant to listen to and didn't get in the way of the content and helped move along the material.
As a newly single psychologist I was pretty turned off by books like The Rules and He's Just Not that into You as sources of relationship advice. These are books written by people who are totally untrained about psychology or relationships, and go very much against what is known about attraction and love. I had studied child attachment theory and knew it was well validated, but really had never learned anything about attachment applied to adults. I was floored at how well this theory explains relationship behavior and was so totally able to explain dating and relationship issues I had run into. Even the exact phrases I had an avoidant partner use with me. This book spured me to do some delving into the scientific literature, which agrees with what the authors present. The advice appears good, except I think not encouraging enough that anxious folks should try to change their behavior and thinking (which is dysfunctional and can create relationship problems even with a securely attached person or one who is even mildly avoidant). It does paint avoidant folks as fairly hopeless and as the bad guys, which I'm not sure is 100% the whole truth. Although I did get a take home message of avoiding avoidants because they are just more trouble than they are worth! The book also doesn’t consider mixed attachment types (avoidant-preoccupied/fearful). However, this book does an excellent job explaining adult attachment in a simple and entertaining way.
In terms of romantic relationships, I have always assumed that there are two kinds of people, which turned out to be known as the anxious and the avoidant people according to this life-saving book, and I thought that I belonged to the first category. Because I blamed myself for being anxious, I did not want to have relationships with other anxious people (one was enough, I thought); and though I did was not a fan of the avoidant type of people, I thought, for lack of a better choice, I preferred to mate with an avoidant person.
After This book entered my life, however, I realize now that I have another choice, another possibility, a new hope! There is a whole new category of people of whose existence I was not aware, but secretly wanted to believe: the secure people. This was hu-u-u-ge comfort to me.
Also, the book helped me to accept myself and see that my sensitivity was not disfunction (as the avoidant people I realized I was surrounded with used to force me to believe).
Thank you all (writers, directors, publishers, featured people, narrator [Walter Dixon’s voice was a delight to hear]) for this book. I love myself more now, and I have hope.
I have already started listening to the audible book again just to make sure I didn't miss anything. Fresh perspective that makes total sense.
Understanding myself better - understanding what triggers my anxious attachment style.
The tittle says it all.
This is a unique book.
Great for following
No I wanted to listen on my one hour commute
Worth reading for all