This book was written in a research style that dragged with redundancy at times. I liked most of the examples of denial & dissonance given, but some were lengthy & tedious. A closing summary of how to avoid becoming a major mistake maker in denial would have been helpful.
Avid reader of history, biography, and true crime.
This book explains cognitive dissonance and the related concept of self-justification. The research underpinning these theories is presented, with case examples which range from big political decisions which start wars to interpersonal conflicts which all of us deal with in our everyday lives. The easy and seductive part of the book is fitting the theories to the behaviour of people we know - it explains a lot. The tricky part is to keep reminding yourself that it is equally applicable to your own behaviour and may also explain a lot about you. With any luck it will help people to recognise their own mistakes and avoid making similar mistakes in future. Even if it doesn't change your life or improve your relationships, it's an interesting read and an easy way to learn some basic Psychology. Marsha Mercant has a very pleasant voice and does a very good job as narrator.
Besides incessant listening to audiobooks, I also read on my Kindle at night, birdwatch, garden (roses, daylilies), and do genealogy.
"Mistakes, who me? Not very often! I'm pretty perfect most of the time."
This book was a bit scary to me because it shook the foundations of many of my beliefs.
This book debunks many of all our common beliefs. For me, that my memories are reliable it is I who remember what really happened, unlike my brother and my hubby, who were there but must have memory problems. Not so, apparently. It seems my memories are as faulty and unreliable as anyone else's.
For me, that my sister-in-law adds to and embellishes her family history, more and more every year, but I certainly don't do that! Apparently, not so. I am not immune to this either.
In general, honest people do not confess to crimes they did not commit. Most certainly not. Well, maybe with the exception of the Central Park Jogger story, where all the young men arrested and convicted made false confessions and were innocent. That was an anomaly, right? Apparently, not so. This book in detail explains how and why people will confess when they haven't done the crime. This section is truly scary and I have given up my support of the death penalty, telling my hubby he was right all along. I admitted my mistake to him, a rare thing for one who seldom made mistakes (before this listen.)
Mistakes. Yes, that is another area covered. The book explains how and why we justify our mistakes, in the rare cases we make them (or are they so rare?) It is so understandable it is truly unnerving.
Also discussed in depth is a the area of spats, grudges, feuds, divorces, wars and why things get so terribly ugly. This section made me feel truly helpless and sad.
Everyone can benefit from this book. It really is a must listen that I stumbled across as a daily deal. I wouldn't have searched it out. My mistake.
It is life changing for me.
Reduce number of examples probably.
Depends on the book not the idiots who read it.
The book was very informative and helps explain this we do and see around us.
Enough with the Republicans/Conservatives are cheating, lying idiots and corporations are evil, corrupt and Selfish Meme. Can we please move on...
Fascinating subject, but very poorly written. This is an incredibly shallow take on a complex subject. In any particular chapter on an issue (say, cognitive dissonance), the authors give a brief explanation of the concept, cite a couple of studies, then go on extended length showing over and over again that it happens. Not "how" it happens, not the brain science, but "that" it happens, through repeated stories: some real, some inconclusive, some "just-so-stories" to show how a person would think.
This book could be reduced to a magazine article.
Though some of the topics were unsurprising, the authors present an honest, insightful discussion of the tendency toward self-justification, the harm it causes, and means for avoiding the temptation. Historical examples, and many recent issues, provide important lessons in the importance of skeptical thought and admission of mistakes.
although I purchased this book believing it to be on the topic of relationships, it was still a great listen, and much of the content is applicable to improving communication and dissolving tension in all manners of interpersonal relations.
the narrator (Marsha Mercant) was what deterred me from completing this book. this is the second book that I have not been able to get through because of this same narrator. Need a better suited voice please!!!
I studied cognitive development in grad school. I wish this had been on my list of books to read. As an educator and an activist, this information is invaluable when it comes to having difficult conversations.